"..give me back my House of Representatives view"
(sung to the tune of Green Acres)

"American Myopic"

Harry: "You vote the way I tell you to, or I'll take this pitchfork and..."

Nancy: "...and your eyes will pop wide open, like this!"

TINE Magazine People of the Year 2006

(yes the spelling is correct)

"I hope that hayfork is well-lubed, 'cuz it's gonna be used..."

"Greeeeeeeeeen Acres is the place to be..."

Ooops...sorry Eliott. Somehow I missed seeing your post...never mind.

Harry thought: It is bad enough being sent to Hell, but do I have to spend it here on this farm...with HER?

Harry's recurring nightmare: "I now pronounce you Man and Wife...you may now kiss the bride"

The official photograph of Pelosi and Reid has been hung in the Capitol. A Democratic spokeman insisted it clearly shows how the leadership is in touch with Middle America.

Say what they will about lobbyists and ethics reform, a closer look will reveal that the new Democratic leadership is overjoyed that they now own "Green" Acres.

Harry and Nancy seek to improve the Democratic Party's image in America's heartland. But being a city girl Nancy is caught off guard by the pig rooting up the back of her dress.

Let's talk farm subsidy....

1) The DNC's latest attempt to appeal to "Red State" voters by tauting their rural roots.

2) Pelosi's and Reid's answer when told that the pork they had for dinner was the star of "Wilbur".

Extra! Extra! Mystery of flying saucer over Chicago airport is solved!

The hens were no big deal, but she had never seen anything like that big red masculine...uh "rooster" before!

"I wear the pants now, Harry. Let's go in there and exchange clothes."

"Ooops…sorry Eliott. Somehow I missed seeing your post…never mind."

FormerHostage, Don't fret, they take
spin-offs - Elliot

"Oats? Wheat? Corn? Nope, we are planting guacamole this season!"

"It's a breach Nancy, ya just gotta stick your hands up in there and turn the calf around."

DRUDGEBREAKING: Today HBO has announced its new spinoff series -- Bride of the Cryptkeeper

"Nancy, my dear. I'm about to make your day."

Apocalypto II

Congressional Gothic

"I don't think we're in Kansas anymore."

The tyranny of the majority or the majority of the tyranny?

If we earmark it, they will come.

Two brains good, forebrains bad!

How are you ever going to keep them down in Congress once they've seen the farm?

The Great Karnak: "An Orc, a dork, and a fork."

Now on Fox: The Simpleton's Life

Surreality TV

Even Nancy was surprised when Harry suddenly said:
"Therefore, you men of Lincoln,
Take pity of your town and of your people,
Whiles yet my soldiers are in my command;
Whiles yet the cool and temperate wind of grace
O'erblows the filthy and contagious clouds
Of heady murder, spoil and villany.
If not, why, in a moment look to see
The blind and bloody soldier with foul hand
Defile the locks of your shrill-shrieking daughters;
Your fathers taken by the silver beards,
And their most reverend heads dash'd to the walls,
Your naked infants spitted upon pikes,
Whiles the mad mothers with their howls confused
Do break the clouds, as did the wives of Jewry
At Herod's bloody-hunting slaughtermen.
What say you? Will you yield, and this avoid,
Or, guilty in defence, be thus destroy'd?"

... and then, suddenly, Karl awoke in a cold sweat.

American Got Hick?

Suddenly, Nancy shrieked, "It's the prophecy!"

Nancy balked at Harry's suggestion that she consider Preparation 4-H to relieve her discomfort.

This was photoshopped?

Nancy was shocked when Harry started singing, "Up against the wall Red State mother."

The 101st Congress, sweeter than a George impeachment.

"What if he's got a pointed stick," is no longer a rhetorical question.

Nancy was not amused when Harry sang, "It's something unpredictable, but in the end it's right. I hope you had the time of your life."

"All power flows from the tines of a pitchfork." -- Senator Harry Reid

Harry glared and Nancy looked appalled -- that's twenty-two captions in less than one hour! There must be a way for us to tax such prodigious output.

Okay Nancy, tomorrow you get up at 4 AM, collect eggs from the roosters and milk the bull.

charles wins

...that’s twenty-two captions in less than one hour...

and this time most of them are funny,
nyuk nyuk nyuk

Nancy is still in shock from using the out house, that's one seat she didn't want to fill and someone stole the Sears catalogue to boot. Harreeee?

"I'll get Santa outta the Chimney."

When Hillary took off her top, Nancy could only stare in udder amazement.

Harry: "No Nancy, I said, 'I love ewe.'"

Harry: She always looks that way, one too many facelifts.

(Note, my dyslexia strikes again above... for the record, this is the 110th Congress.)

Riff Raff and Magenta back on Transylvania..., some thirty years on it's still a jump to the Left.

Harry and Nancy practice their expressions for the camera for President Bush's State of the Union speech.

Now on Fox: The Simple Lie

Nancy suddenly ralized that Harry meant business when he delivered the Democrat's response to the President's State of the Union speech, saying, "You hear me talkin', hillbilly boy? I ain't through with you by a damn sight. I'm gonna get Midwestern on your ass."

Realized, ralized, whatever.

Harry says, "Keep it up Nancy and you'll learn first hand what the Chorus meant by, "A little touch of Harry in the night."

Not a caption... Rodney, the lyrics to Show-Biz Kids fit this surreally well.

Senator Reid explains his three-pronged approach for defeat in Iraq while Speaker Pelosi merely shrieks, "Run away!", over and over.

Now on Fox: The Simple Lie (Repeat)