McCain "John, you MUST give the surge time to work. We MUST prevail in Iraq"
Kerry "Tim, his old gray mare is hanging out of his trousers...make him stop"

Kerry: "Tim, if he falls asleep one more time while I'm talking, I'm outta here!"

John McCain ponders the strategy of making a fist and re-deploying it to his right.

Russert: Whose tie is too bright for our cameras?

Kerry: "He is not wearing any pants"
McCain: "Because they said they were only going to tape us up here"

McCain: "Senator, point at me again and I'll karate chop your finger!"

Kerry: "He has a button right here under his suit jacket. If you push it, he'll spout off one of three pre-recorded messages: 1. If we leave Iraq the terrorists will follow us home. 2. Look at the success in Anbar! 3. We've always been at war with Eastasia."

Kerry - "My wife would tell you to get a facial, have your nails done and get some Just For Men "

"The smeller's the feller!"

McCain: Dynamite? DYNAMITE? There's no dynamite in "Rock, Paper, Scissors" you idjit!

The fickle finger moves in unaware of the force from above…..

It was only after the fact that McCain realized he should not have pulled John Kerry's finger.

McCain: "I think I just threw up in my mouth having to smell his breath...."

John McCain, patriotic defender of the Christian Nation, makes the liberal coward John Kerry look like the typical pandering elitist.

The '50%' nation took a violent turn as two top members of their respective parties started throwing gang signs in a clear harbinger of violence.

The senators took part in the latest senatorial game, trying to pass 'gay signs' to one another.

"I am in my happy place. I survived the worst torture the North Vietnamese commies could throw at me, this is nothing. I will not let him into my happy place."

When Irish eyes are napping, the whole world's napping too.

I'm sorry Madam Tussad, but while the setting looks very realistic, the figures don't look real.

The NBC show Meet the Press made a strong case for term limits Sunday.

Here's the movie pitch ... we combine "Weekend at Bernies" with "The candidate" but the twist is that the other party has to get him elected or face murder charges.

Kerry wins the initial round of "rock, pencil, paper."

"This little piggie went 'Wee, wee, wee' all the way home."

'No, he has the magic hat now. I gave it to him when I led the SEAL team to rescue him from the NVA prison.'

"I didn't throw my medals away. He took them."

Sen. Kerry "TIM, Tim, his foot JUST touched mine AGAIN"
Sen. McCain "BITE ME GHENGIS, Tim i've got a wide stance ya see..."

Kerry: I did so go to Cambodia. John was there with me, right John?

McCain: What?

Kerry: "He just swallowed my report!"

Three stupid liberals.

Kerry: He was for it before I was for it before I was against it. And I was against it before he was for it again, but never against it...before.

1) McCain whispering to Kerry, "That's the POW code for: try to find a slow-boat to Cambodia"

2) McCain: Bring that ketchup loving finger one inch closer and I'll show you what the VC would of done to your finger....

3) Richer and not so rich. In irony, money, campaigns, etc.

Kerry demonstrates McCain's Kung-Fu GripTM.

PS - Why do <SUP> tags work in preview, but disappear when you finalize the post?

Kerry: "I'm not touching you! I'm not touching you!"

McCain: "Well, I'm about to "touch" you..."

Although a little unconventional for display on a national broadcast, John McCain finds that Tai chi is the best remedy for the frustrations brought on by having to listen to the junior blowhard from Massachusetts.

Kerry: I just love it when he sings "Boom Shaka Laka Boom Boom". It makes me hot and crazy!

McCain: "Debating Kerry is so easy I can do it with my eyes shut."

When push comes to shove.