In a show of unity and bipartisan support, Madam Speaker Nancy Pelosi takes to the House floor for a pre-bailout vote speech.

A still photo take from archived footage does indeed show Senator Biden victoriously escaping death after his helicopter was shot down in Afghanistan while flying over the "superhighway of terror".

In a confusing show of support in coal country, the "Scrappy kid from Scranton", Senator Joe Biden takes to the podium for a speech on clean coal energy. Afterwards on the rope line he was heard to say "coal???, no, we support solar panels and wind farms in your back yards".

Q: Are We Not Men?
A: We Are Devocrats!

Obama or die!

Financial implosion????...what financial implosion?

And in this corner .... introducing the World Libwuhl Media Champeen, Gwen Ifill! (crowd roars).

Not to be outdone by Madam Speaker Pelosi, Sen. Reid sets the table stating the passage of the bailout is urgent: "We don't have a lot of leeway on time, one of the individuals in the caucus today talked about a major insurance company -- a major insurance company -- one with a name that everyone knows that's on the verge of going bankrupt. That's what this is all about."

Later in the day Reid spokesman Jim Manley said the senator was speaking broadly and not referring to anything specific.

"Senator Reid is not personally aware of any particular company being on the verge of bankruptcy, rather, his comments were meant to refer to the conditions in the financial sector generally"

Asshat(s)
(blatantly hijacked from ABC News.com)

Nancy Pelosi rises makeup-less for another day as the first Lichqueen Speaker of the House.

The Nancy Pelosi mask sets new records as it out sells both the Jason hockey mask and the Johny Deep pirate makeup for Halloween 2008.

A worker prepares to bail-out the Senate restrooms. Exclaims: "I'm going in"

Year:2020
Osama's son strikes a victory pose at ANWR while sporting his cool caribou skull mask and shouting "Warm your globe with this you infidels!"

After that day, no one really liked to hang around Bob...

Number 1 on the top ten list of least favorite super heroes....Skunk Man.

The final result of public education!

* "And, last but not least, my favorite... a tommy gun!"

* "For my first trick..."

*"Toxic waste stinky! No good!"

* Smokin'!

* Video PSA for Flatulence Anonymous.

*

The winner of the 100th annual and unfortunately final national chili Cook off raises his hands in victory. The group People Against Flatulence (PAF) has forced the event to be shut down due to growing worries about the increase of methane and it's affects on Global Warming.

Off the job, a mild mannered junior senator from Illinois, but in the Senate he's transformed into that Hope and Change promising, truthfighting, champion of the gaffe -- SUPERFLUOUS

"Hi, I'm Stupid of it's the economy, stupid. And all around me is your retirement investment burning in hell."

Wow. They really take their soccer seriously in Hell, Norway.

When you say that historically speaking this is an open presidential election, what exactly do you mean?

Biden extended and amended his remarks to say there was a third force besides trial lawyers and labor unions that was keeping the barbarians from Americans.

And you thought the prices for a bottle of water at the airport were expensive, wait till you see what he charges.

I agree that Biden probably can't reach out to evangelicals the way Palin seems to, but don't you think this is a bit to much counter-programming for the VP debate?

Ayers holds a modest political rally for Obama.

Fifth sign of the apocalypse? I'm sorry but I lost count. It's been a long political year.

Paulson continues to lobby congress for the 'rescue' plan.

Who knew Putin was such a soccer fan?

Somewhere there is a mother who is not quite as proud of her little boy as she would like to be.

. . . and when the dust cleared, there was only one candidate standing: The Palinator!

* Remember kids, If you smoke after sex, try a lubricant

* Hey, look; A Soccer team!!! But what's up with the Tarot cards?

* The guys in charge os smoking the turkey finally figured out how to keep it lit.

* The result of smoking gunpowder.... and inhaling.

* Soccer game, hell.. it's a Motorhead concert.

* Figure III-21: Example of pictures not to include in your resume.

* World's worst dating video

Markos (Damien) Moulitsas rises to destroy bloggers who defy Him. He is the servant of The One.

"Yo.
Put Your Arms In The Air.
Put Your Arms In The Air.
Put Your Arms In The Air.
If You Can Find Any."

Having just said that He calls for the seas to rise and the planet to heal, He then calls for dark clouds and Sturm und Drang.

Sure, Time waits until after the election to let us know that President-Elect Obama is a Death-Eater.

Aw come on, that's just Joe being Joe.

By the power of Greyskull, I have the power!

Steve

"The prophecy has been fulfilled and the time is nigh. The Cubs win the World Series. Abraham Lincoln's last, best hope of mankind embraces socialism and gives up its last shreds of freedom for "hope a dope and spare change." Clay Aiken surprises everyone by acknowledging he is gay. Bwaahahahahahahahaha! Now begins the 1,000 year reign of darkness!"

A bad case of the Edvard Munch-ies.

"I stuck around St. Petersburg, when I saw it was time for a change..."

I guess this confirms that the Village People are the house band in Hell.

"I'll kill the rabbit. Arise storms! North winds blow, south winds blow! typhoons, hurricanes, earthquakes, SMOG!"

There is a method methane to my madness.

The Grim Reaper grew a third eye socket after drinking a glass of Chinese milk.

Tom Cruise's new Scientology video?

Michael Moore's new movie "Plastico" on the effects of using plastic grocery bags.

Beijing worker celebrates restarting the factories now that the Olympics are over.

Gwen Ifill pities the fool who thinks she cannot be an objective debate Obamarater moderator.

Dude, I'm sorry but a bottle of Axe does not cover up the smell.

Biden: "tha....thank you, thank you my fellow Bosniacs!"

Biden: "..and...awe stop, yer too kind...and up to meet with you next my fellow Iraniacs...let's give a rousing ovation for President Barrack Hussein Obama!!!"

A McCain aid celebrates after finding the snowball that put the Senator on the '08 ticket.

With his usual modesty, McCain roars, "I am awesome! A maverick! A war hero! To hell with everyone else!

Barney Franks' housekeeper emerges victoriously after cleaning his bathroom again.