Ahhhh...it's Representative Foley! Run for your lives!

RUN!!!!! Randalls back!!!!!

The race for president of the EU is well under way!

UNIFIL forces responding to a threat.
(Ed Note: the threat is behind them.)

"Hey #2. You see where that Foley guy checked himself into alcohol rehab? Well, I'm a drunk and I resent the implication. He should be in a totally different category, say maybe PedoSot."

What a bunch of weenies.

The CIA's difficulty recruiting new agents to infiltrate ethnic groups were well known, but as this training video shows, it's only getting worse...

Next seasons "Survivor".

Contestants divided by food groups.

Goooo...Weenie Clan!!!!

I acknowledge the problems with our two party system, but surely you can see that the European multi-party system isn't producing any better results.

Some where in a deep circle of the inferno, there is a special place being prepared for whoever thought this was a good idea.

The color commentary and descriptions of the game may not be reproduced with out express written permission of major league baseball, especially the part about the stands being empty and we had to photoshop the picture of the running of the hot dogs to hide how bored the fans were.

Yet again the French show why their amusement parks aren't ready for the American market.

Europe has the running of the bull's in Pamplona and the Siena horse races, but that shouldn't overshadow the unique cultural heritage in the good old US of A.

Rigged.

Oh sure. Its okay to make fun of my heritage, but there would be rioting in the streets if you did the same thing to any minority group.

The Berlin opera production of Mozart's "Idomeneo" is on again with just a slight change in the depiction of the four gods.

The first Sausage Race including the new Chorizo went awry today as the actor got too far into character and attempted to climb the fence.

Ah, and Michael Jackson can't get a nose job! Now that's a nose job!

Bush's running mates!

Did someone say Miss Piggy is here! We're outta here.

1) You know when you've taken over a country, when they make you their mascot. Who's taken over France you ask? Why Lance Armstrong, #2, running with Germany (Lederhosen) and Italy (Pizzathrower)

2) Nothing says "team sports" than oversized foam-bodied fools running a 50-yard dash.

Did they really have to number them???

See dicks run. Run dicks! Run!

Our story begins when Wilford Brimley, Dilbert, Chef Boyardee and - - probably Tom Hanks but it's hard to tell - - all get stinking drunk at a Brewers game . . .

A race to the bottom.

. . .

Oh, that didn't sound just right, did it?

You never sausage a race.
You're always a weiner with us.

The French peace keeping force charges up the beach.

The Mario Brothers always threw a good summer party, but when someone spiked the punch the pants came off and the stupid drinking bets started...

Members of "Athletes Stopping Steroids" demonstrate the benefits of NOT using steroids: No Shrinkage.

Oh, no! Albert Haynesworth just put on his cleats, and our heads are very big!

We wear short skirts!

Weiners gone wild.

Would I offend somebody if I ordered a Number One with Kraut?

"Look you weenie, as the dearly departed Johnnie Cochran might have said, 'Declare you're gay all the livelong day but if the victim is a child, you a pedofile.'"

Things got pretty wild at the Hamburglar's bachelor party...

"I called Scott Boras. He's gonna represent us. Da weenies are gonna be hot shot diggity dogs now."

"No, no, no. Barney Frank is upstanding. Principled. Has frank as his name for goodness sakes. He said he was gay from day one. Foley is this newly announced homo. Always said he was not gay. Even the gay people are saying, 'Hey, cupcake. We don't want your unwholesome, sicko self. Stay straight."