Comments on: Caption Contest

By: Jay Tea

Jay Tea — Sun, 21 Aug 2005 23:21:21 +0000

When I was in college, the Homecoming theme was "Comic Strips." The Medieval Guild (of which I was a part) chose, naturally, "Hagar The Horrible." I was a galley slave on their boat, and our leader (Dan The Barbarian, in full Hagar regalia) led us in song. I still recall some of the lyrics, and they seem especially fit for this contest: "Oh, I come from Scandanavia with my helm upon my head, And I won't be going home again 'till all of you are dead! I'm a Viking! For that's the thing to be! There's no greater joy than fighting for a berserker like me!" "Pillage and rape and loot and burn, but all in moderation. If you do these things we say, you'll soon rule all the nations. Kill all your foes and enemies, then all of your relations! Pillage and rape and loot and burn, but all in moderation!"

By: Stop The ACLU

Stop The ACLU — Sun, 21 Aug 2005 18:01:24 +0000

Sunday Funnies

Caption Contests are always fun. Here are a few.

By: Mr. Right

Mr. Right — Sat, 20 Aug 2005 19:11:46 +0000

The last remnants of the Taliban Navy, pictured here, were put out of their misery moments later during a fool-hearty assault on the USS New York.

By: McGehee

McGehee — Sat, 20 Aug 2005 15:21:23 +0000

First Viking: "Been to New York before?" Second Viking: "No, you?" First Viking: "Yeah. It's not all it's cracked up to be." Second Viking: "Why?" First Viking: "Well, the robbing sounds attractive until you actually get going. Then you start to notice all the competition. Especially in Central Park at night." Second Viking: "Really." First Viking: "Yeah, but the pillaging is actually okay. This is a great place for a first-class pillaging experience. You just have to pick the right neighborhood." Second Viking: "What about the raping?" First Viking: "Just don't go there. You'll understand when you see the women."

By: Cowboy Blob

Cowboy Blob — Sat, 20 Aug 2005 01:39:07 +0000

So, Olaf, I ask Helga what she wants for her birthday and where to get it and she tells us to Sack Fifth Avenue. At least that's what I thought she said. That wench can nag! Got another Lutefiscicle?

By: charles austin

charles austin — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 20:31:24 +0000

Water, water, every where,
And all the sticks did shrink;
Water, water, every where,
Nor any pops to drink.

Call me Olafshmael.

But this time, the book of Kells is, in fact, quite safe.

Waterworld II was made on a significantly smaller budget.

Damn the Dream Bars, full spead ahead!

The Battle of Jutland as reenacted by the Ladies Auxiliary of Weston-Super-Mare.

Ragnar Danneskjold holds fast to his Randian principles as he continues his lonely quest for John Galt.

On we sweep with threshing oar
Our only goal will be the western shore.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh. -- Led Zeppelin

Yes, I am a pirate, two hundred years too late.
The cannons donât thunder, thereâs nothinâ to plunder,
Iâm an over-forty victim of fate,
Arriving too late, arriving too late. -- Jimmy Buffett

The mystery masked man was smart
He got himself a Tonto
'Cause Tonto did the dirty work for free
But Tonto he was smarter
And one day said kemo sabe
Kiss my ass I bought a boat
I'm going out to sea
And if I had a boat
I'd go out on the ocean
And if I had a pony
I'd ride him on my boat
And we could all together
Go out on the ocean
Me upon my pony on my boat -- Lyle Lovett

By: Russ

Russ — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 05:45:37 +0000

Row, row, row your longboat,
Gently up the Zuider Zee,
Merrily, merrily merrily, merrily,
Life is but a series of raids, with the concomitant pillaging, rape, slaughter, burning and more rape, followed by centuries of historical analysis, culminating in the inevitable use of your likeness and reputation by a group of overpaid tight-pants-wearing pigskin tossers. Which seems more like a nightmare than an actual dream.

By: The Man

The Man — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 05:10:44 +0000

You asked what happens to Navy budgets when Democrats come to power?

By: The Man

The Man — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 05:09:02 +0000

This contest is an outrage. Has anyone bothered to ask Cindy Sheehan how she feels about a viking ship made of wood ice cream sticks?

By: garry swaffar

garry swaffar — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 03:11:51 +0000

Alec Baldwin, finally making good on his pledge to leave the country if Dubya is re-elected, found an ecologically appropriate transport.

My name is John Kerry, and I wanted to be your President !

Otto, this is NOT Kansas

By: dougrc

dougrc — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 03:01:29 +0000

It was announced this week that China had purchased a mothballed former Soviet aircraft carrier to be refitted for their fleet. Whatever they paid it looks like Putin made out like a bandit.

By: Maniakes

Maniakes — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 02:06:20 +0000

Leif Erikson lied, people died!

By: Bithead

Bithead — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 01:06:48 +0000

* Don Knotts and Tim Conway star in `The Reluctant Viking'!

* (Travel Poster) Sail the Seas! See the world! Plunder the lands! Be a REAL he-man! Be a Viking!

* Viking Philharmonic Orchestra arrives in America for it's annual tour. The group is reported to have the world's largest horn section.

* Now remember, everyone... This time, it's rape, Loot, THEN pillage, ok? I'm not going though this again!

* And this time, remember where we docked it!

By: Bithead

Bithead — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 00:58:42 +0000

Of COURSE they're not rowing very fast... They're TIRED... we've been towing three water-skiers the whole bloody way....

By: Donald Sensing

Donald Sensing — Fri, 19 Aug 2005 00:50:43 +0000

Spam, spam, spam, spam! Spam! Wonderful spam! Spam!