Launch or lunch? You be the judge.

"Presidential Campaigns Are Stalked By Public Opinion."

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the canoe...

Fruit of the Loom unveils a new test procedure to test it's new line of pucker proof underwear.

* Downsizing at Sea World

* Oh, wait... he's a lawyer. He's safe. Professional courtesy, you know.

Iran, realizing that harassing U.S. Naval ships with speed boats is, well, just plain silly, unleashes the latest weapon in maritime Jihad....the hull bumping trained shark....

"My name is Bill Richardson. I could bob around here in the presidential race a while longer, but I sense something ominous ..."

Run Forrest, run!

Paddle or no, this fellow's up the scatologically proverbial creek.

Man: Oh, crap!
Shark: Oh...CRAP.

A revived Hillary, off of her tearful struggle in New Hampshire, now confident she can kayak with the big fishes.

A glimpse into the mind of Thomas P. Peschak: "That guy is in some serious trouble... where's my camera?"

"I think I'm going to need a bigger boat."

The deep blue water was preternaturally becalmed and the sun sparkled almost directly overhead in the cloudless sky and Chigurh readied his captive bolt pistol as the shark approached...

"Candygram."

Can't I get a frickin lazer beam around here!? Is that to much to ask for the Iranian Republic Guard's armada?

Joe never realized that listening to the Jaws soundtrack on his iPod would attract a shark; and that was his downfall.

"Candygram."...everyone knows that was a land shark...totally different beast :)

Longtime New Hampshire resident Tom Smith, 32, thought he could escape the pollsters by vacationing in Tahiti ... but he was wrong.

Bob thought his new yellow sea kayak would get him noticed at the beach. He soon learned what every pretty girl knows, sometimes you get noticed by the wrong sort.

Look closely class. Now, who can tell me which is the endangered species?

Row, Obama, Row!

So Bob, to what do you attribute your remarkable open water kayak win?

The National Paranoia Association just released it's national ad campaign entitled: Just because you are paranoid doesn't mean something isn't out to get you.

The AP photographer arrested with two buckets of chum denied being in anyway connected with the sharks and said he just happened to be in the right place at the right time for the photograph.

Closer ... Closer ... Come just a little bit closer and daddy will have a new sharkskin golf bag.

Tourists ... the other white meat.

Rejoicing was premature when Obama supporters saw he had a slight lead in the race.

Beef: It's what's for dinner!

Shark's menu: Boeuf ala Canoe!

They say one picture is worth a thousand words. This one conveys just two: "Oh s*it!"

Canoeist: Gee! I wonder why there are no tropical fish in these waters?

Fine print on kayak rear view mirrors reads "larger fish may appear"

* The shark repellant tests were going quite well.... until....

* "Here's Brucey!"

* Robin... the Bat-shark repellent!!!

* "There hasn't been sharks in these waters for years."

* If "Fish are freinds, not food", then the question must come up eventually what sharks DO eat."

"Wow, I'm just minutes from completing the first solo human powered crossing of the Pacific."

Well isn't that nice, Obama and Hillary are going for a swim in the ocean together. How sweet.

Allegory for sub-prime loans.

"Why, oh why, didn't I take the blue pill?"

For goodness' sake, please end the writer's strike before any more reality shows get produced!

All the other kayak racers wondered where Joe got his sudden burst of energy.

From the top. Up tempo!! ROW!! ROW!! ROW!! YER!! BOAT!!....

Gee... When Cheney ask me to go fishing with him, I didn't know he needed BAIT!!

Shark thinks... hmmm...looks good!... I hear everything tastes better on a Ritz!!

Reality bites.

Damn Layer just wont leave me alone...

* "Now to find out if they really do taste like chicken."

* "I don't like the crunchy shell, but that soft, gooey filling is delicious."

Tom and his new acquaintance set out to find out which of the two really is God's best hunter, when Tom starts to wonder if he shouldn't have made that blatantly racist anti-shark joke at the pool bar last night.

MMMMM......Twinkie!!

Hmmmmmm.... that would make a great kayak-skin wallet for my son's birthday!

Satchel Paige was right.

Hippie recreation sports have jumped the shark.

Sorry, Charlie.

Tastes like chicken of the sea.

"Hey Wanda. Say cheese. Ok, now say nice knowing ya."

***a forehead slapping moment***……I could have gone golfing today……

"Let's go to Hawaii." she says, "it'll be relaxing." she says.

* The latest fad: The shark attack diet. Lose 30 lbs in less than 5 seconds. (Not yet FDA approved)

"You'll always remember this as the day you almost ate Captain Jack Sparrow."

Quint in his younger days.