President Obama today pleaded with Israel for help, after having dismantled the U.S. military. And sustaining a direct missile strike from Iran. Asked what he would do if the Israeli's declined his request? Obama responded: hell if I know.

The race for Veep has begun.

Pooper scoopers were strickly enforced at the park today, as some pet owners were shown abiding by the rule.

* Look, Hiram... eventually, we're going to have to admit the Steroids we used on those horses gave us some really screwy results....

*Tiny's performance was a little off due to a Drinking binge the night before... Apparently he drinks to forget.

When we received word that time was running out for my captured husband, President Clinton. I led a daring, daytime mounted rescue mission into the jungle, and saved him from the cannibals.

Barack and Hillary concede neither an inch in their ongoing superdelegate battle.

We heard a story this morning in Palmeroy that you know really was tragic. About a young elephant who got pregnant .... and then went to the hospital. The hospital told her she needed a hundred dollars up front, in order to be seen. Which she didn’t have (she worked at the polo grounds for minimum wage).

When she went back to the hospital a second time, they again refused to see her. Then sadly ... something went wrong with her pregnancy, and 15 days later she died.

Time is running out for the big name Republicans as McCain continues his vetting process.

So that's where the Republican balls went!

Given the long, sad droop of #12's stick, maybe they should replace that Audemars ad with one for Viagra.

Obama's relatives show they can be "Monkeys on the Republicans Back".

For Javas, actually, the most embarrassing thing was having a giant "2" chalked onto her butt.

One night in Bangkok and . . .well . . . and you never know *how* you're going to wake up.

Try as he might, Amnuay couldn't get Mancini's "The Baby Elephant Walk" out of his head for *days* after the event.

With every Hillary set-back more GOPers come to realize that they're not only still in the game, but also could make the final goal.

Hmm, professional back-seat drivers - - my mother-in-law would ROCK at this game.

The

Battley Townswomen's Guild reenactment of Hannibal crossing the Alps.

In the remake of The Man Who Would Be King, Matt Damon and Ben Affleck play buzkashi with the head of George "Ootah" Bush.

NASCAR makes do after US runs out of oil.

In lieu of global warming threats, Al Gore seeks to introduce fellow Tennesseans to a new "green" sport.

President Bush vetos Democrat plan to bring sex-crazed elephants into Medicare program.

Of course the Democrats superdelegates are riding elephants to play polo, you don't want them to look like asses do you?

Is that elephant wearing a thong?

Horton rushes in to protect the speck holding the Whos.

Hillary Clinton: "I remember being a pachyderm polo jockey... it's why I tried to join the Marines!"

Survivor: Phuket

I've got time on my trunks.

The obesity problem in America affects even our polo ponies!

CNN Headline.....America goes to hell, while the Republicans play golf.

Republicans work toward their goals, while the Democrats sit on their asses and bray!

Now that donkeys rule the political circus, Shock and Awe eek out a living in Pakistan while wondering what went wrong.

Thanks for the HM last week - Elliot

Proof positive - In the 2008 presidential race, time is on the side of the Republicans.

* A Elephant? , We're Democrats, Mabel - Sheriff J. W. Pepper

* A dropped bag of Peanuts spoiled the whole game.

* The elephants for Hibdu's team sported Grey jerseys. The other team wore pink.

* Inventor L.A. Funt's next project, using Elephants for WATER polo, didn't work out quite as well.

*

Obama appointing Al Gore chief of the EPA, quickly lead to legislation effectively ending fossil fuel transportation. To many's surprise ... it did not end the nightmare of the Monday morning commute.

Going around the last turn, Big Ear Barry comes wide to pass Bill's Bossy Broad. And now at the top of the stretch ....