And I was told global warming was a bad thing, look how much bigger and healthier these penguins look, with just little Sunshine and warm weather.

The Anchorage Daily News has endorsed Barack Obama for President.

I imagine that this endorsement will tend to have some more weight than newspaper endorsements typically do. Not much more weight, but some. It’s certainly more likely to get attention.

The Enumclaw contigency was Black and White and Bred all over.

First penquin: "..so where is Jennifer Aniston like you promised?"

"Hi, I'm a MAC"
"Hi, we're LINUX"

Oh, sorry. This is the "Swimmer" party. The "Schwimmer" party is down the hall.

Drudge Report:
Schwimmer dates Hef's quadruplet exes.
Opens fitness center.

No seriously, after "Friends," best I could do.

* Opus, Opus, Boy George, Ops, and Opus

* Outside the Red Lobster in time for the Calamari Special

* Monty Python's first x-rated film, entitled "Oh, intercourse the penguin!"

* Look, David, the bottom line is that being perfect, we didn't NEED to evolve!

* Tonight on PBS... Ballpoint penguins; an endangered species.

* Paul Penguin was getting up there in years, and was a little hard of herring.

Penguin in the middle speaks out for the Jenny Craig Diet.

Schwimmer: "Tuxedos? I didn't know this was supposed to be formal."

Four gleeful penguins look forward to fertilizing middle penguin's eggs!

ADA proudly claims credit for hiring four new carrier pigeons!

The cast of "Friends" come together for an 11th season!

Cleverly disguised as a member of the Antarctica delegation, Gore's assassin makes his escape!

Wow! look at those pretty pink "flamigo dancers"
nothin' like that back home!

Hey, guys, keep the Cuban accent and they have to let us stay!

After several successful clonings, confidence rises when "he" says in unison.....
"Tennessee Tuxedo will NOT fail!"

C'mon and see,see,see,see,see,see,see,see,see,see,see see.......Oh nevermind!

Fans come all the way to Anchorage,from as far away as Antarctica, for the "Chilly Willy Film Festival"

"Enquirer" Headline......
"Burgess Meredith, successfully cloned after years of storing his frozen DNA!"

Dave Schwimmer began to understand why anchovies were becoming less popular as a pizza topping... they attracted that kind of crowd.

One of these things is not like the others,
One of these things just doesn't belong,
Can you tell which thing is not like the others
By the time I finish my song?

As the rest of the "Friends" have moved on with their lives, Ross tries to assuage his loneliness with his new posse of penguins.

If Palin makes it to the White House, you know where we're heading!

Palin's Republican consultants!

Hey David .... have you heard the one about Sarah Palin and the sailor?

Three Killer Whales walk into a bar .....

Schwimmer's remake of Eddie Murphy's Party All the Time, failed to ignite MTV viewers.

Ever dream about being a bigtime Hollywood actor? Don't wait ... call 1-800-Flakey Weasels now, for rush delivery of our full color glossy brochure. With important details on how you too can climb the stairway to the stars!

If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life
Never make a pretty chick your wife
So for my personal point of view
Get an ugly bird to marry you

Gorged on a continuous nonstop diet of MSNBC krill. Four members of the Obamanation, merrily waddle to the polls.

Tired of Elephant Seals kicking sand in your face? Fed up with getting pushed around the beach? Try Gold's Gym new one month trial membership. We will pump you up!

Conferees take a photo break during "Global Warming" convention in Gila Bend, AZ.

Four penguins and David Schwimmer are driving through Nevada. The car breaks down in a small town off the highway. They stop in at a body shop.

A mechanic tells them, "well it's going to take an hour for me to figure out the problem, take a look around the town and come back in about an hour."

They walk around the town, and notice it is very hot out. Walking along they discover an ice cream shop. So they stop and order some vanilla ice cream. The penguins are unable to hold forks, so they just starts shoveling ice cream into their mouths, and make an enormous mess.

When they return to the shop the mechanic turns to them and says, "it looks like you blew a seal."

Schwimmer replies, "No, it's just ice cream!"

[My apologies to the original.]

Voice of The Count on "Sesame Street" - "The number of the day is 4. One Two Three Four ... Five? Hey Schwimmer, this is Count von Count. Get lost. You're messing up my count."

Fraudulent Obama donors gather at DailyKos convention

* Hoboken?!!?!?!?!?? I'm Dyin'...... dyyyyyyinnnnn'...

* Come along, my little booboochitos.

* "Quick! Throw me a mackeral!"

* Do you want the calamari or the squid?