"Honey, I know you wanted those 600 pounds of Imported Bamboo Shoots but I thought the gym membership was more ideal for you right now."

* Look, YOU'RE the one who wanted me to paint this place... Now quit your complaining and PUSH....

*NEWSFLASH: Panda mating fails; Veterinarian takes over

* Panda-monium....

* Look, it isn't just Pooh who can do this stuff... and anyway, we're cuter.

* The early attempts at a Panda space program proved to be problem-filled. First of all, they couldn't tell the rocket from their tree.

Can you hear me now?

Come on Joe, get up there and keep your mouth shut. We will discuss important issues and get your imput in about four years. mpw

Hey Sam have you considered Jenny Craig?

Daring Panada escape attempt foiled.

Panic results when the CDC declares a pandemic.

It was a case of sheer Panda-moanium for Hop-Su (bottom), when Sing-Sing (top) had the urge to pass gas.

If you think it's funny up there, you should try it down here.

Top Cub: I don't think this is going to work.

Bottom Cub: Now, you tell me.

"Well, I suggested 'An Elevator for Christmas' in the Suggestion Box and I'm just saying that our Keeper is not a keeper."

I promise, the grass is greener over there, they have global warming.

If I have seen a little further it is by standing on the shoulders of Giant Pandas.

Guv Blago sat on a wall.
Guv Blago had a great fall.
All King Obie's horses and all King Obie's men
Couldn't put Blago together again!

Seriously, I saw this in a Taliban training film. And if we want to be part of the Animal Uprising, we're going to have to get in shape.

"Coal ooze is the least of your worries at this particular moment, honey."

Quick, Shi-Shi, Kim Jong Il isn't watching! Free bamboo in South Korea!