Israeli Santa delivers gifts to the good and deserving members of Hamas. MPW

When they declared war on Christmas, they forgot that Christmas might fight back ....

* Production of puffed wheat rose by 200%. The workers sang in the fields as they worked...

* The Moscow version of the annual pumpkin Chunkin' contest only had one entry this year.

* "This will be almost as popular as the flamethrowers I gave out last year" said Santa.

There is a downside to US toy safety standards.

Santa decided to add shock to the awe of Christmas.

It depends on what your definition of present is.

The reason Santa doesn't have competition in the sky... Anti-Aircraft guns.

In Russia today, the equivalent of Santa Claus distributed the equivalent of lumps of coal to the naughty people.

A special delivery for Putin is on the way.

Santa: Enough of this lump of coal crap

I am sure to get that impostor Santa now!

Russian Santa demands that Western reindeer file a flight plan, or else!

this is easy than getting the damn bike down the fricking chimney....

But Santa .... I asked for a B-1B with a full payload.

Santa gets his gun off.

Russia celebrates Christmas in Ossetia.

Russians feel that Christmas is a blast!

Conditions for those on the naughty list deteriorated rapidly once the IPCC recommendations for the complete abandonment of coal were implemented.

The Night the Reindeer Died II: Santa's Revenge

The Russian equivalent of Santa delivers a present to Poland.

"Wait'll you see what we do for Easter."

Now, kids. This is why you don't want to be on the naughty list. Capice???

Russian Santa: "Bombast? Is same as Bomb blast? Nyet?"

Holy Christmas am I glad I wasn't on his naughty list this year...

Bush's "final offensive" against the Taliban begins...

Rudolph!! Dasher !! Alright, which one of you clowns put gasoline in the water canon?

There! That'll teach Rudolph to do an unauthorized fly-by.

(BBC newsreader voice) "The arrival of Santa caused much excitement"

Santa: "Presents? You want presents? I'll give you presents, you greedy little B**tards!

I'll give you Xmas

The naughty list 'coal' has been updated for the new millennium

With retail sales slipping, the traditional holiday war between Macy's and Gimbal's has heated up.

In a bold move by the Russian communist party, they have shed the image of Lennin and Stalin while maintaing their 'tough guy' persona

Somewhere in Russia there is a 5 year old son of a 'redleg' gazing in wonder at his dad for being an elf who jerked shells for Santa

Camouflage ain't what it used to be

Hey kids, Can you find Santa in this picture?

You have to admit, the toys are more realistic this year

The Russians are trying to match the golden age of Madison Avenue, but they just don't seem to get the hang of it

Later that day, the regulations were changed to require only blanks be used in the future.

Putin downplayed the latest invasion of Georgia by saying it was only holiday tourists.

A still from the Federico Fellini film of "Twas the Night before Christmas". Said the Master: " I wanted to show Santa comes but once a year... and the train in the tunnel bit was overused, and besides... we couldn't get the reindeer of his to fly through the damn tunnel, anyway."

"Ho Ho Hoshana!"

"What does this button do?"

"Sure Santa, but it's kind of tough to conceal, or carry, for that matter."

One the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me a cartridge and artillery.
One the second day of Christmas my true love gave to me two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the third day of Christmas my true love gave to me three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the fourth day of Christmas my true love gave to me four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the fifth day of Christmas my true love gave to me five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the sixth day of Christmas my true love gave to me six guys a slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the seventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the eigth day of Christmas my true love gave to me eight grenades-exploding, seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the ninth day of Christmas my true love gave to me nine lads-a-lancing, eight grenades-exploding, seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the tenth day of Christmas my true love gave to me ten LAWS-a-rockets, nine lads-a-lancing, eight grenades-exploding, seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the eleventh day of Christmas my true love gave to me eleven snipers sniping, ten LAWS-a-rockets, nine lads-a-lancing, eight grenades-exploding, seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.
On the twelfth day of Christmas my true love gave to me twelve Hummers humming, eleven snipers sniping, ten LAWS-a-rockets, nine lads-a-lancing, eight grenades-exploding, seven Seals-a-swimming, six guys-a-slaying, five old Enfields, four whirlybirds, three French Mirages, two turret mounts, and a cartridge and artillery.

Christmas arrived with a bang.

Note to self: when playing army with Santa, leave bag of little green plastic toy soldiers, at home.

So like ... ummm who decides if Santa's been naughty?

Tired of all the whiners who didn't get a Wii, or a large flat panel TV, Santa pushes back.