Kinda reminds me of my fraternity days... heh heh

Dateline 2008

Barry Bonds, steroid free for three years, appears in public for the first time since 2005, his body deteriorating into an old gray-haired white guy.

This is the way I showed my Houston Astros how to do it.

President Bush reenacts November 6, 2004. "Bend over Senator!"

Another popout to the shortstop. Back to the Bush leagues.

"Maybe if A-Rod could have used one of these, I wouldn't have had to sell his ass to the Yankees."

"Killing These Crickets With A Bat Is Too Slow, If I Was President Of This Country I Would Nuke Em."

Once he saw Bush grab a bat, Agent Wilson knew, as the newest member of the detail, he would be responsible for cleaning the Presidential jockstrap again.

Dubya was relieved that he managed to visit, play in and enjoy the place without ever having to pronounce Islamabad.

"You know, with these flat bats, I bet we could get some really good batting averages..."

"When I was at Yale we used to have paddles like this, but we only used 'em for hazin' pledges."

Bill Clinton isn't the only one with a sticky wicket.

When asked about the quantity and tenor of the now relentless fifth column attacks, upon his administration, the President replied: "it's like swatting at flies."

More channeling Bill Clinton: "I'm gonna get me a piece of that."

Man, the umpire's calling an awful lot of low strikes today. And what's with the sticks in front of the catcher?

"Heh-heh, this is almost as much fun as whackin' evildoers."

Bush paddles, kids died!

Al Gore's evidence on his accusation Bush mistreats Arabs in the US turns out to be false, Bush just kicked there ass at cricket, but then again Cricket is a sport played by men and what would Gore know about sports and men for that matter.

"Coming your way, Butt. Heh heh...I love saying that..."

Bush demonstrates why the Texas Rangers have always sucked.

* Fore!

* The first and only tryout of the glass cricket bat.

* New York Times Headlines over this picture scream: "Club Weilding George W Bush charged with Battery"

Inadvertently creating a political firestorm, Bush outsources the Secret Service to some guy named Raheed.

Bush-lbw

That's just not cricket.

Bush goes for six as Dean moves from third slip to silly point.

Viv Richards, eat your heart out.

Say what you want, facing Imran Khan without protective gear takes balls.

Great googly, Moogly.

Politicians love throwing out the first pitch in cricket matches where bouncing the ball in is rather strongly encouraged.

Bush swings for the, um, fences.

(Somebody make sure Tim Blair knows about this one.)

"Well, Mr. U. S. President, you would to enjoy this school as you did your Yale School. Must to maintain below average grades for to matriculate. Arrive and is great fun. Much substance abuse and games. Then get sheepskin."

Bush learned to swing the paddle during his days at Yale, hazing John Kerry in the Skull & Bones fraternity.

AP: President Bush, dodging allegations of steroid use, is only 56 googlies away from Hank "the Hindu" Aaron's all-time mark. Bush credits his unique batting form, not human growth hormones, for his googly success.

"I would Of Brought Cheney, But I Was Afraid He Would Hit Some One In The Head With A Cricket Ball."

"I Had A Sticky Wicket Once But I Washed It."

It was one of the few problems Laura had with her husband. George always got so competitive playing a simple game of catch with the family springer spaniel.

After the second over, Bush started taunting the bowler and suggested he "bring it on" instead of bouncing it in front of him every time.

"Well, thank you for the opportunity to play cricket, Pervez. I brought Roger Clemens along to let you try your hand at baseball."

Joe Buck's agent is sitting in the stands desperately hoping that Bush can hit one for six so that Joe can introduce the second larget market in the world to his catch phrase, "Slama-lama ding dong."

To get in the zone, President Bush could be overheard muttering to himself like an Indian Ted Williams as he warmed up, "I am Shiva, the Destroyer of Worlds."

When told that a first-class cricket test match can run for five days, President Bush remarked that cricket is more like baseball than he had realized.

The President decided he'd go to the Summer Olympics as an athlete.

"Bush corks one into right down the line! It may go...! Go crazy, folks!! Go crazy!! It's a home run!! And the Republicans have won the game...by the score of 3 to 2...on a home run by... the Prez! Go crazy!"

(Redone of the Ozzie Smith HR in 1985)

Them crickets got big balls!

My battin'z much better than my English, I suppose