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 Outside the Beltway 

CARNIVAL OF THE VANITIES #48

ARE YOU READY
FOR SOME FOOTBALL?


Five Lombardi Trophies from Super Bowls VI (1972), XII (1978), XXVII (1993), XXVIII (1994) and XXX (1996)

THE FRONT OFFICE

Business and administration

Hall of Famer Tex SchrammJerry Jones

“Tom Paine” of Silent Running discusses silly questions on citizenship exams.

Northstar at The People’s Republic of Seabrook thinks random drug testing of high school athletes is a bad idea.

Joanie Da Goddess muses on having Jimmy Buffet advising Arnold Schwarzenegger on economic policy.

Justene Adamec of calblog explains why a tax hike is not what California needs.

Steven Taylor at PoliBlog has an, er, naked solution to power blackouts.

Sean Hackbarth at The American Mind explains the impulse for protectionism.

Alex Frantz of Public Nuisance drafts a Constitutional Amendment: Marriage According to the Bible.

THE COACHES

Ranting, raving, and motivating.

Hall of Fame Coach Tom LandryCoach Jimmy JohnsonCoach Bill Parcells

Drew at Never Trust a Monkey has a rant about monkeys and tree huggers.

Ilkya Damon wants us to all just get along. (Part I and Part II)

Andrew at REDUX extols the virtues of Little League baseball.

Lummox JR at Pyrojection rants against web-based piracy.

Little Miss Attilla is tired of hearing about how hard it is to avoid obesity.

QUARTERBACKS

Getting all the glory.

'Dandy' Don Meredith src="/fotos/carny/roger.jpg" alt="Hall of Famer Roger 'The Dodger' Staubach" Hspace="1">Troy Aikman


Dean Esmay of Dean’s World presents an href="http://www.deanesmay.com/archives/004668.html">alternative perspective on feminism.

Laurence Simon of Amish Tech Support imagines the pre-flight speech on Palestinian Airlines.

Frank J at IMAO takes us into his world with Ride of the Warmongerers.

Dean Esmay of Dean’s World writes an ode to his shotgun.

Acidman at Gut Rumbles thinks the French are wusses for not being able to take the heat.

RUNNING BACKS

Carrying the load.

Don Perkins
Hall of Famer Tony Dorsett
Herschel Walker
All-Time NFL Rushing Leader Emmitt Smith

Aimless9 at Aimless Forest explains why he href="http://www.aimlessforest.net/archives/000184.html">won’t be leaving the Anglican Church.

Kinayda at Kin’s Couch puts things into perspective.

Andrew Cline of Rhetorica has some thoughts on media objectivity.

Adam, A Single Guy In The South, weighs in on the issue of marriage.

StumpJumper and Zombyboy ResurrectionSong have an exchange on the marriage issue, too.

Andres Gentry at water reflects on what China can tell us about citizenship.

John at Discriminations posts on desegregation cases dying of old age.

Greyhawk at Mudville Gazette talks about the influence of American culture on three Asian countries with whom we’ve fought wars.

RECEIVERS

Quick bursts of speed.

'Bullet' Bob Hayes
Drew Pearson
Jay Novacek
Michael 'The Playmaker' Irvin


Eric, the Capitol Hillblogger, writes about why it’s not nice to href="http://hillblog.blogspot.com/2003_08_01_hillblog_archive.html#106060768312569248">call people Nazis.

Scarlet of unfknblvbl offers some thoughts on the capture of SE Asia’s most wanted man.

Wind Rider of Silent Running offers his take on spam, spam, spam from Howard Dean.

Dave of IsraellyCool has a href="http://israellycool.blogspot.com/2003_08_10_israellycool_archive.html#106086706199740101">short poem making fun of a girl who has been murdered satirizing an anti-Semitic writer.

bussorah at Wicked Thoughts recounts a somewhat explicit old joke.

Ravenwood at Ravenwood’s Universe has a plan for eliminating road rage.

Eric Lindholm, the Viking Pundit, thinks someone is playing a trick on the Democrats.

Harvey Olson of Bad Money describes a day in the life of a French “superhero”.

The host of Jay Solo’s Verbosity wants to know what movie reality you’d like to live out.

LINEMEN

The faceless ones doing the dirty work in the trenches.

Hall of Famer Bob Lilly
Hall of Famer Randy 'The Manster' White
Ed 'Too Tall' Jones
Harvey Martin
Rayfield Wright
Charles Haley
Larry Allen

Jeremiah Lewis at fringeblog has a

href="http://fringeblog.com/index.php?p=409&more=1&c=1">solution for the Arab-Israeli conflict.

norbizness Of Happy Furry Puppy Story Time wants to know

href="http://norbizness.blogspot.com/2003_08_10_norbizness_archive.html#10608128955">who watches the watchers.

Brian Arner at Resonance campaigns for The Workplace Religious Freedom Act.

Jim at Snooze Button Dreams thinks we could learn a thing or two from the Europeans on teen drinking.

Rick DeMent at The Rant has some thoughts on U.S. immigration policy.

Nathan at Brain Fertilizer says morality isn’t what you think it is.

The Talking Dog gives a pooch’s eye view of the big blackout.

Lisa Thompson at Field Notes talks about women and their shoes.

Christopher Genovese at Signal + Noise has a suggestion to help improve journalists’ reporting on scientific experiments.


LINEBACKERS

Mean S.O.B.’s that love to hit somebody.

Chuck Howley
Lee Roy Jordan
Dexter Coakley

LittleA of A little Aardvark never hurt anyone responds to an editorial that compares conservatives to nazis, terrorists, rednecks, racists, McCarthyites and simpletons.

Doug at Rightward Reasonings sets his sites on Nick Kristoff

Jon Ray of PC Watch takes on href="http://pcwatch.blogspot.com/2003_08_01_pcwatch_archive.html#106107858846568514">extreme lefties in the academy.

Jim DiBenedetto at Eleven Day Empire says consistency is the hobgoblin of large newspapers.

C.D. Harris at Ipse Dixit thinks Wesley Clark is a lying weasel.

Greg at Begging to Differ wonders why the SF Chronicle can’t tell fact from fiction on the topic of Arnold Schwarzenegger.


SAFETIES

Versatile and often-overlooked.

Cliff Harris
Charlie Waters
Bill Bates
Darren Woodson

Richard Baker of Sharp Blue presents

href="http://www.theculture.org/rich/sharpblue/archives/000034.html">Flamininus at Corinth.

Pieter Dorsman at Peaktalk explains why he thinks Arnold Schwarzenegger is such an attractive candidate.

Pietro at The SmarterCop doesn’t think we need the schools teaching kids patriotism.

The eponymous author of Trish Wilson’s Blog has the scoop on another pervert running for governor of California.

Chaz at Dustbury has some thoughts on women and divorce.

One Fine Jay talks about eating weird food.

James Griffith of Griffany Online thinks the commentariat is missing the boat on the UN bombing.

Madeleine Begun Kane at Notables Weblog has a Fair & Balanced Song Parody

Joe at Attaboy would have bet on the right horse. But he didn’t.


CORNERBACKS

Ball hawks.

Hall of Famer Mel Renfro
Everson Walls
Dennis Thurman
Deion 'Prime Time' Sanders

Gareth Lloyd at Kuboid defends the

href="http://www.kuboid.com/archives/000071.html">Second Superpower thesis.

Alex of Hypocrisy & Hypotheses writes about his

href="http://irrationalnoise.com/handh_comments.php?id=P255_0_4_0">addiction to BlogShares.

John Moore at Useful Fools thinks Baghdad blogger Salam Pax is a href="http://www.tinyvital.com/BlogArchives/000248.html">whiner and a baby!

Brian at Argues with Signposts trashes Dave Winer and the

href="http://arguewithsigns.net/mt/archives/001241.html">BloggerCon.

Kiril Kundurazieff, the proprietor of SneakEasy’s Joint has some thoughts on Blog Wars.

Kevin Aylward of WizBang! calls on everyone to choose a side: Frank or Glenn.


KICKERS

Weird little guys–but essential to the game.

Rafael Septien
Danny White (All-Pro at QB and punter)

John Lemon of Barrel of Fish wants to be B.B. King (

href="http://www.johnlemon.blogspot.com/2003_08_03_johnlemon_archive.html#10604942">here,

href="http://www.johnlemon.blogspot.com/2003_08_10_johnlemon_archive.html#10606173">here, and

href="http://www.johnlemon.blogspot.com/2003_08_10_johnlemon_archive.html#10607114">here)

Cerona at CyberEcology has a story about

href="http://cyberecology.blogspot.com/2003_08_01_cyberecology_archive.html#106074934327026007">Moore’s Law and the diamond trade.

Phil the Speculist provides the Time Traveler’s Toolkit, Part 2.

Andrew Ian Dodge of Dodgeblogium writes an Idiot’s Guide to Cthulhu.

Rothy of Back to the 80s fondly recalls the music of. . . the 1980s.

The author of Solonor’s Ink Well likes music and lists some here, here, and here.

The ruler of Life in Queen Medb’s Castle apparently likes rain.

PRACTICE SQUAD

They’ve got skills but can’t make it to the game on time.

Gunther of the Gunther Concept compares the websites of the Texas Democrats and Texas Republicans.

Tiger of Rantin’ and Ravin’ looks back fondly on his youth as a poet.

BTW: Next week’s Carny is at Creative Slips.

About the Author: James Joyner is the publisher of Outside the Beltway and the managing editor of the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer, Desert Storm vet, and college professor with a PhD in political science from The University of Alabama. He lives just outside the Beltway in Alexandria, Virginia with his wife and infant daughter.

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Comments
 

What? I'm not the Waterboy?

Posted by Laurence Simon | August 19, 2003 | 10:35 pm | Permalink
 

Heh. Well, on the Cowboys, quarterback might be a step below waterboy these days. :)

Posted by James Joyner | August 19, 2003 | 10:38 pm | Permalink
 

Here, I'll be a cheerleader:
Well done James!
Okay, so I'm not so good at cheerleading. But I am sincere.

Posted by Greyhawk | August 19, 2003 | 10:54 pm | Permalink
 

Thanks. Just don't show up in little short shorts and a halter top!

Posted by James Joyner | August 19, 2003 | 11:00 pm | Permalink
 

I don't "do" football, but it's a cool and well done theme regardless! Nice idea.

Posted by Jay Solo | August 19, 2003 | 11:06 pm | Permalink
 

Fabulous job James!

Posted by Maripat | August 20, 2003 | 12:40 am | Permalink
 

Just to clarify...my poem is meant to be taken as satire. It is also a stab at Amiri Baraka, whose own poem, amongst other things, accused Jews of being behind 9-11. You missed the point if you read it as my own trivialization of the girl's murder.

Posted by Dave | August 20, 2003 | 01:48 am | Permalink
 

No pics from the Ice Bowl I see. Selected Cowboys history I suspect.

But seriously, nice touch.

Posted by Sean Hackbarth | August 20, 2003 | 02:22 am | Permalink
 

Good job, though a Redskins motif would have been far better.

You could have at least thrown in some cheerleader pictures to compliment your selection of this second-rate team. 8^)

Posted by Brian A. | August 20, 2003 | 02:40 am | Permalink
 

Last time I played football, without a flag, in elementary school, I caught a pass, scored a touchdown, and ran into the goal post.

All on the same play...

And didn't stop running until, crying, I reached the nurses office with a soon to be black eye. :-)

Great job!

Enough reading here to entertain me during the down time during festivities surrounding my sisters wedding this week. :-)

Posted by Kiril | August 20, 2003 | 02:45 am | Permalink
 

Great job on the Carnival. Love the football theme.

On a side note, I can't wait for Thanksgiving. My Dolphins are gonna crush those guys from Dallas.

Posted by Val Prieto | August 20, 2003 | 08:39 am | Permalink
 

Thanks for all the wonderful memories of America's Team, and a very well done Carnival. It makes me doubly sad I did not get anything submitted. Let us hope the Big Tuna can make the star shine again.

Posted by Tiger | August 20, 2003 | 08:50 am | Permalink
 

Val,

I dunno--we don't have Leon Lett around anymore to hand you guys the game! (Of course, we don't have Troy and Emmitt anymore, either...)

Posted by James Joyner | August 20, 2003 | 09:23 am | Permalink
 

Good Job, James. Thought the football theme was right on...

Posted by Alex | August 20, 2003 | 10:02 am | Permalink
 

Ahh, I remember the Leon Lett game very well. It won me a bottle of Johnnie Walker Blue Label froma very distraught Cowboys fan. The onlything that worries me about your team this year, froma Dolfan point of view, is that you now have the Tuna. Whats your QB situation now anyway?

Posted by Val Prieto | August 20, 2003 | 10:06 am | Permalink
 

Val,

Don't know right now. It's either Carter or Hutchinson. Neither looks to be ready, but there aren't any good options.

Posted by James Joyner | August 20, 2003 | 10:08 am | Permalink
 

Great job, James. I'll refrain from saying anything bad about the Cowboys (in that they beat the snot out of the Texans recently in pre-season).... but as for the QB controversy, is Steve Pelleur available?

Posted by Norbizness | August 20, 2003 | 11:31 am | Permalink
 

Great Job James! Thank you!

Posted by Sharon Ferguson | August 20, 2003 | 11:40 am | Permalink
 

BTW, could you please tell us where the CoV is being hosted next week ??

Posted by Jeannie Fiona Macaulay | August 20, 2003 | 11:43 am | Permalink
 

Yes, great job.

Hmmm...no Instalink yet? Should we all assault the Prof. at once, or let James do the honors?

Posted by Greg | August 20, 2003 | 11:49 am | Permalink
 

Jeannie, CotV will be hosted at my site next week. Click on the name for further info.

Posted by Rhesa | August 20, 2003 | 11:54 am | Permalink
 

Dave, love the poem. Trust me, as a contributor to Christian Peacemaker Teams (loosely affiliated with International Solidarity), I am far more sympathetic to the Palestinian cause... but Baraka's poem about 9/11 was ugly and offensive beyond words, and yours was darkly humorous in response. It is a hard time...

Posted by Hugo Schwyzer | August 20, 2003 | 12:16 pm | Permalink
 

Ahh...Instalink. That's better.

Posted by Greg | August 20, 2003 | 12:25 pm | Permalink
 

Val and James,

Everyone's confused about the QB situation, and Parcells isn't letting on if he knows. The local sports guys are split between Hutch and Q-Car. The safe bet seems to be on Hutchison. One theory, which I happen to buy into, is that Parcells is testing Hutchison to see if he can handle adversity by making him uncertain about who has the job. Neither one of them is a pro-bowler, but I'd be surprised to see the job go back to Carter.

Posted by Greg | August 20, 2003 | 12:29 pm | Permalink
 

Greg,

That's my impression as well. Check out my co-blog with Steven Taylor at Dallas Cowboys Football. It's mainly just links and commentaries on the stuff that's availble elsewhere, but a good clearinghouse.

Posted by James Joyner | August 20, 2003 | 12:33 pm | Permalink
 

You've set the bar high.

Posted by acline | August 20, 2003 | 01:26 pm | Permalink
 

I can't even get tickets to the God damn game.

Posted by SageOne | August 20, 2003 | 03:18 pm | Permalink
 

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CARNIVAL OF THE VANITIES #48

Will be hosted right here at OUTSIDE THE BELTWAY. The results will be posted the morning of August 20th. Those wishing to participate should e-mail their entries (include the permalink URL) not later than 10PM Eastern time Tuesday the 19th.

The Carnival was started September 22, 2002 by Bigwig of Silflay Hraka. More information on its origins and intent can be found here.

The gals at Right We Are are hosting next week’s installment. Send your entries to them ASAP.

About the Author: James Joyner is the publisher of Outside the Beltway and the managing editor of the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer, Desert Storm vet, and college professor with a PhD in political science from The University of Alabama. He lives just outside the Beltway in Alexandria, Virginia with his wife and infant daughter.

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Comments
 

Thanks for the plug James!

Posted by Maripat | August 10, 2003 | 12:40 am | Permalink
 

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