How about we welcome back France into the NATO fold by giving them the UN as a gift?

Yeah, and it would be appropriate for them to convene in Paris, on the river Seine, on garbage scows

Running this group of ne'er do wells and misfits off to Paris would raise the intelligence level of both countries.

Dude, the French have been a pain since the freedom fries incident.

No, son,
You are wrong, just try to curb your ignorance and employ your sense of history, if you were ever taught any any remembered it.

The problem with the French started with Charles DeGualle in the sixties; and it was not about French fries after 2001, with or without ketsup.
The Allies bailed France and freed France in WWII. deGaulle hid out his ass in London till after the Normandy invasion. Rode into Paris in an American jeep and upon the backs of thousands of Americans and Allied forces who lay dead in his wake.
He regained control of France.
Abanoned NATO.
Went to Canada and almost incited riots in the sixties trying to get Quebec to become a French colony.
The French back in NATO, that's like tossing a turd into the punch bowl.

Who would ever have guessed that France’s reentry into the NATO military command would cause headaches for the United States?

Dude, the French have been a pain since the freedom fries incident. They aint got no gamee to bring now. Theys liberals whose going to suffer a fate worse than torture.

What does that leave?

Just the deterrence mission, really. And I'm not sure what it is we're deterring.

I've got some extended thoughts on that here: French NATO Return Provides Opportunity to Reflect