The 2006 Indy 500 is over. Danica Patrick did not win. Mario Andretti’s grandson finished second and some guy I’ve never heard of won.

Unlike golf reporters, who at least have the sense to tell us where Tiger Woods finished when he doesn’t win an event, the story does not mention where Patrick finished. She placed 4th last year.

Update: She finished 8th. Not a bad first two Indy 500’s. Incidentally, the winner was Sam Hornish, Jr., who was the 2001 and 2002 IRL champion. That I’ve never heard of him says something about how far this sport has fallen from its heyday. There’s not a pre-1996 CART Champion whose name I’m unfamiliar with; most are household names.

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OTB Sports

Rookie Indy racing sensation Danica Patrick quietly married over the weekend.

Starting line: Patrick weds in quiet ceremony (AP-ESPN)

Although Danica Patrick got plenty of publicity for her season in the IRL, she certainly doesn’t want much for her wedding. The 23-year-old driver, who finished fourth in the Indy 500, and physical therapist Paul Hospenthal, 40, were married Saturday in Scottsdale, Ariz. Team spokesman Brent Maurer said Patrick has asked Rahal Letterman Racing to release virtually no information on the ceremony. Maurer could only confirm Tuesday that Patrick was married and that car owner Bobby Rahal was there.

Though she is accustomed to driving at 200-plus mph, Patrick told People magazine this year that one of her favorite things is sharing life in the slow lane with Hospenthal and their miniature schnauzer, William Robert, called Billy. “She’s kind of a TV junkie,” who also enjoys barbecuing and working out, Hospenthal told the magazine. “But you won’t see her watching much racing.”

Patrick met Hospenthal while seeking treatment for a hip injury from a yoga session.

It’s rather ironic that a car racer gets injured doing yoga. Indeed, I thought the whole point of yoga was that it’s easy on the body.

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The 2005 Indianapolis 500 is underway. Will the winner be the highly publicized rookie Danica Patrick or someone else?

For those, like myself, uninterested in watching the race, ESPN is live blogging the race, providing the highlights.

Update (1550):

3:43 ET: With 38 laps to go, the race has gone to a green flag again.

3:35 ET: The front of Patrick’s car was fixed quickly and she returns to the track, under caution still, in 10th place.

The top 5 order, with 40 laps to go, is: Wheldon, Meira, Franchitti, Bourdais and Kanaan.

3:31 ET: Patrick spins and triggers a multi-car crash on lap 155. Her car is in the pits being worked on.

Oops.

4:14 ET: Dan Wheldon has won the 89th Indy 500. Vitor Meira passed Danica Patrick, and so did Bryan Herta, but Sebastien Bourdais crashed with one lap to go, bringing the yellow flag and clinching the win for Wheldon.

Patrick finishes fourth, the same place she started, both of which were milestones as no woman previously had done so well.

4:10 ET: With 6 laps to go, Wheldon passes Patrick again.

4:08 ET: On a restart with 10 laps to go, Patrick passes Wheldon to retake the lead. Fans are on their feet and cheering as Patrick’s storybook month plays out spectacularly.

4:02 ET: Dan Wheldon passes Danica Patrick by a whisker at the line as a yellow flag comes out due to Kosuke Matsuura’s wheel breaking with 14 laps to go.

3:54 ET: Guess who’s leading? Hope you said Danica Patrick. With 21 laps remaining, Patrick leads following a pit-stop sequence. The question now is, does she have enough fuel to make it to the finish?

Oh, so close.

Danica Patrick makes a couple of rookie mistakes (AP – Fox)
Patrick finishes amazing 4th at Indy 500 (AP – MSNBC)

Danica Patrick could hang with the boys. Then again, she was still just a rookie at the Indianapolis 500. Patrick, the highest-starting female driver in Indy history, became the first woman to lead a lap in the 89-year history of the race but her chances of winning were hurt by a couple of rookie mistakes.

First, the 23-year-old Patrick stalled her car in the pits, costing her precious time. Then, after working her way back up to seventh, she lost control with 45 laps to go while the yellow flag was out. The cars were coming up to speed to take green when Patrick suddenly swerved left in front of Tomas Enge, shearing off the nose cone and left wing on the front of her No. 16 car. The crash knocked out Enge and sent Tomas Scheckter spinning into the inside wall. “I was beside Danica and she just spun into me,” Sheckter said. “Luckily for her, someone was there to keep her from spinning. If I’m not there, she would have spun into the wall.”

Patrick dipped into the pits, managed to get car repaired and got back on the track in 10th place. “I’m sorry,” Patrick told her crew over the radio. “They were going so slow. I slowed down, but as soon as I went up high it just stuck.”

The Fox link also has, quite naturally, a Danica Patrick photo gallery.

Patrick has to be the most hyped 4th place finisher in Indy history, too. Still, an impressive performance by a rookie with so much attention on her.

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Robby Gordon: Danica Patrick Has an Unfair Advantage
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Robby Gordon thinks Danica Patrick, in addition to snagging all the interviews because she’s the sexiest driver in this year’s Indy 500, has another advantage: She’s too small.

Robby Gordon says Patrick has an unfair advantage (AP)

Robby Gordon accused Danica Patrick of having an unfair advantage in the Indianapolis 500 and said Saturday he will not compete in the race again unless the field is equalized. Gordon, a former open-wheel driver now in NASCAR, contends that Patrick is at an advantage over the rest of the competitors because she only weighs 100 pounds. Because all the cars weigh the same, Patrick’s is lighter on the race track. “The lighter the car, the faster it goes,” Gordon said. “Do the math. Put her in the car at her weight, then put me or Tony Stewart in the car at 200 pounds and our car is at least 100 pounds heavier. “I won’t race against her until the IRL does something to take that advantage away.”

The Indy Racing League does not consider the weight of the driver in its race specifications. The car has to weigh at least 1,525 pounds before the fuel and driver are added, and teams in Indy have estimated that Patrick will gain close to 1 mph in speed because of her small stature.

Although her rivals in Sunday’s race have said she doesn’t have a huge advantage, pole-sitter Tony Kanaan told reporters he would like the Indy Racing League to look into the issue. “Right off the bat, a guy my size is spotting her 105 pounds,” Gordon said. “That’s the reason she’s so much faster.”

Gordon is absolutely right. In the spirit of unity, this I vow: I will not compete in the NBA finals until the league does something about the fact that Shaquille Oneal is a foot taller than I am and outweighs me by 140 pounds, giving him an unfair advantage in the paint. Similarly, I will not report to training camp with the Dallas Cowboys until they look into the fact that the players are all stronger and faster than I am.

This issue has united the blogosphere, apparently, as both Kevin Aylward and Kevin Drum think Gordon is a moron.

(P.S.: If you arrived by Google looking for nude photos of Danica Patrick, you’ve come to the wrong place.)

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