Britney Spears Used As Weapon Against Somali Pirates

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No, not her personally, just her music:

She’s sold close to 100 million albums worldwide, but it seems Britney Spears can’t count Somali pirates among her many fans. In fact, her tunes are being used to turn the tide on high-seas crimes.

Merchant naval officer Rachel Owens recently spoke to Metro and revealed that a “blast of Britney” is all it takes to send the pirates packing.

“Her songs were chosen by the security team because they thought the pirates would hate them most,” Owens said.

I know the sound would drive me clear to the next continent.

FILED UNDER: Popular Culture, ,
Doug Mataconis
About Doug Mataconis
Doug Mataconis held a B.A. in Political Science from Rutgers University and J.D. from George Mason University School of Law. He joined the staff of OTB in May 2010 and contributed a staggering 16,483 posts before his retirement in January 2020. He passed far too young in July 2021.

Comments

  1. James Pearce says:

    They had to start using Britney after they noticed the pirates playing air guitar to Black Sabbath.

  2. Matt says:

    @James Pearce: Aaaaaaand one up vote for you sir!

  3. JKB says:

    Britney’s replaced Barry Manilow.

  4. OzarkHillbilly says:

    I SURRENDER!!! I SURRENDER!!!

  5. DC Loser says:

    Pretty much anything on today’s “hits” stations would drive me to surrender.

  6. JWH says:

    If the Somalis don’t surrender, Justin Bieber is next.

  7. OzarkHillbilly says:

    @JWH: NO!!! NOOOOOOOO!!!!

  8. JWH says:

    @OzarkHillbilly:

    Baby, baby, baby …

  9. al-Ameda says:

    At least the Somali pirates have the good sense to ‘know’ that Britney Spears does not make good music. What’s the next level though? What would the Naval team play if Spears failed to turn the pirates away – William Shatner singing “Lucy In The Sky With Diamonds”?

  10. Ben says:

    My only contribution to this thread is that I always forget how hot Britney really was those first few years after she hit it big. Man, she fell apart, BAD.

  11. pylon says:

    Joking aside (and I’m all for the jokes), is there any real evidence that this stuff has the nitended result or is it just semi-racist fantasy (like “let’s put a pig farm next to the Mosque!”)?

  12. Nikki says:

    @pylon: Since when does disliking an artist’s “music” amount to even semi-racism?! Overwrought much?

  13. grumpy realist says:

    I have to send people over to read this thread over at alicublog. Epic. What happens when a Pajama Media idiot starts bloviating about Jay-Z.

  14. pylon says:

    Nikki – the notion was that it is decadent and sexual and thus would offend their anti-Western sensibilities. It’s made clearer in the article.