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From The “I’d Hate To Be This Guy’s Lawyer” File

Murder

A Kansas man on trial for murder has an interesting tattoo: 

A Kansas man facing first-degree murder charges is trying to convince the government to let him do something about his giant “MURDER” neck tattoo before the trial begins.

The first-degree murder case against Jeffrey Chapman is scheduled to begin next week. Prosecutors say Chapman killed a man in 2011, leaving the body behind in a roadside ditch for hunters to discover.

According to the AP, Chapman’s defense attorney is now seeking to have the state bring in a tattoo artist to obscure or remove the giant mirror-image “MURDER” tag. Prosecutors say no, pointing to the fact that Kansas tattoo artists can only work in licensed facilities, a list that does not include jail cells.

Some unsolicited legal advice. First, don’t have “Murder” tattooed on your neck, or any other part of your body. Second, don’t murder people.

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About Doug Mataconis
Doug holds a B.A. in Political Science from Rutgers University and J.D. from George Mason University School of Law. He joined the staff of OTB in May, 2010 and also writes at Below The Beltway. Follow Doug on Twitter | Facebook

Comments

  1. Tillman says:

    It’s not enough to tattoo murder in giant bold font on your neck. No. You have to invert it so you can read it in the mirror while you brush your teeth.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 1

  2. Franklin says:

    I’m trying to think what they could change it to in order to help out the defense. “MARTYR” would still require a lot of tattoo work, I think.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  3. KansasMom says:

    Nothing good comes from Kansas making the national news. Ever.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 12 Thumb down 1

  4. rodney dill says:

    Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear.

    Highly-rated. Helpful or Unhelpful: Thumb up 23 Thumb down 0

  5. Wouldn’t the simplest way to solve the problem be to let him wear a turtleneck or a turtleneck-style dickey under his dress shirt?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

  6. John Peabody says:

    Maybe he’s a grammer nazi…maybe he likes to murder split infinitives.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  7. OzarkHillbilly says:

    First, don’t have “Murder” tattooed on your neck, or any other part of your body. Second, don’t murder people.

    Words to live by….

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 4 Thumb down 0

  8. bill says:

    @Timothy Watson: good point, and hopefully the jury won’t know what the “tear” tattoo means!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  9. @bill: That’s his problem, not exactly anything they do with that other than cover it with a band-aid or something similar.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  10. beth says:

    One word – Sharpies!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  11. Franklin says:

    @OzarkHillbilly: It’s certainly decent for free advice, but I would suggest switching the order.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 1 Thumb down 0

  12. rudderpedals says:

    MURDER -> MORDOR gets points from Tolkien fans on the jury

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 6 Thumb down 0

  13. Tillman says:

    @Tillman: Also, the neck? That’s chickening out. Tattoo it on your forehead, that’ll show some foolishness guts.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 5 Thumb down 0

  14. al-Ameda says:

    I recommend a remote (uninhabited) island in the South Pacific.
    We can leave him there.

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 3 Thumb down 0

  15. Matt says:

    Guess it’s time for plan B? Lots of makeup and a turtleneck?

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 2 Thumb down 0

  16. Barry says:

    @rodney dill: “Objects in mirror are dumber than they appear. ”

    That’s great!

    Like or Dislike: Thumb up 0 Thumb down 0