OTB Caption Contest
Time the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Time the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
TMZ.COM/Slash News
Winners for this contest will be announced next weekend.
TMZ.COM/Slash News
FILED UNDER: Uncategorized, Contests
I found this in a drawer in the Oval Office. Smells like Lewinsky. From 1995.
“The secret of life is honesty and fair dealing. If you can fake that, you’ve got it made.”
Maybe if I pretend to be interested in this cigar he won’t notice that I can’t help staring at that comb over.
Breathe deep
Bob (left) smiles gleefully as President Obama steps right into his trap by sniffing the cigar he made in his backyard.
Mr. Obama briefly considers a disguise before traveling to Capitol Hill.
Hmmm. Maybe Michelle will let me smoke one of *these*.
Now do I look like Mario or Luigi?
“Uh…. Mr President, John Kerry wants his neck bolt back.”
#1 reason why cigars are better than sex: you can do this right in front of people and they’ll just joke about it.
MEMORANDUM
From: President Barack Obama
To: Central Intelligence Agency
RE: Disguises
===================================
I recognize that budget cuts have hit every federal department. But this is NOT an acceptable false moustache.
Is this the Cuban cigar-stache I’ve been hearing so much about?
Confirmed: the President is a (Groucho) Marxist!
@Mu: Dangit, you beat me to the reference …
“I love the smell of an oppressive regime in the morning.”
Smells great. May I Havana other?
“No, really; this is Bo’s chew stick. I love the smell of rawhide in the morning.”
“My plan will reduce the cost of Cuban cigars by $2500 per year.”
“Send Boehner & McConnell a box of these, pronto . . . and tell ’em to inhale!”
“I believe I detect the smell of
Marco Rubio’s whining in the air.”
Don’t Barry me, bro!
“Normalizing trade with Cuba will provide Michelle & me with another place to vacation. There’s so few good places to go anymore.”
“It’s an El Blammo, sent with regards and no hard feelings from Kim Jong-Un.”
Derp Marx, the last of the Marx brothers (and distant relative of the Mannitto Indian Chief that sold Manhattan Island to the Dutch) poses with a Cigar under his nose. We aren’t sure why.
Seemingly in slow motion, Obama catches and breaks off a cue stick during a barroom brawl at the White House, according to the pool report.
“If Michelle sees this, tell her it’s a pretzel stick….No, wait, she’d get mad at me for that, too!”
Obama does Groucho Marx imitation, thinking it’s Charlie Chaplin.
Obama: Yup, this is a vintage Havana Lewinsky alright. You can smell the aroma of young estrogen.”
Oh Oh!, the last time a president took an interest in cigars it was trouble!
Not Bill Clinton….Close, but no cigar…
Usually when I do this mustache routine, it’s a two person bit with a female assistant….
@Paul Hooson: “….. you must pay the rent!”
“What this cigar needs is a good, ten cent country.”
You say Bill never got near this one?
What about Fidel? I’ve heard he needed help from a cigar a time or 2 as well.
A cautionary word Mr President, rumor has it Bill had a few dry runs with Hillary before the Monica incident.
OTT RD….just threw up in my mouth a bunch. 🙁
Snively Whiplash?
The Frito Bandito?
Dirty Sanchez?
Killjoy was here.
Fidel Casshole?
And you say this was just now rolled in China too?
You don’t think North Korean dictator Kim Jung Un thinks I’m making a joke about him by doing this, do you? Because I am!
You don’t think North Korean dictator Kim Jung Un thinks I’m making a joke about him by doing this, do you? Because I am! Wabba Laba Dub-dubs!
You want proof?? So why does the aroma only go up 6-7 inches? Better than some cock and bull story about, ahem, “hard drives” Mr President.
@rodney dill:
“That’s impossible, guys, the outer wrap is flawless.”
@markm: …and we call it ‘The Aristocrats’
@JWH: Hey, if the CIA has to wear bunny suits, the President gets a cigar mustache.
Gruber says this isn’t transparent so I’d be stupid not to smoke it.
“Smells like teen spirit”
Not to waste a minute of his final term, President Obama figures out how to burn the cigar at both ends.
Sometimes, a cigar is just a photo op.