QUEER EYE FOR THE TERROR GUY

Andy Borowitz

Carson Kressley, the fashion savant of the hit series “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy,” today questioned Homeland Security Secretary Tom Ridge’s choice of orange for the current terror alert, calling the color “wildly unflattering.”

“I don’t know too many men who can pull off orange,” Kressley said. “And if I were a big husky boy like Tom Ridge, I would definitely avoid it like the plague.”

By issuing an orange alert, Kressley argued, Ridge was putting the nation “at a greater fashion risk than ever before.”

“We’re all running around worrying about al Qaeda, but that doesn’t mean we should have to worry about looking bad, too,” Kressley said.

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