White House Petition Calls For Building Of Death Star

That’s no petition, it’s a space station: 

Petitioners at the White House website want the Obama administration to begin construction of a Death Star. “Those who sign here petition the United States government to secure funding and resources, and begin construction on a Death Star by 2016,” a petition posted earlier this month reads. These petitioners see a Death Star — a fearsome, planet-destroying science fiction weapon from the Star Wars series — as economic stimulus. “By focusing our defense resources into a space-superiority platform and weapon system such as a Death Star, the government can spur job creation in the fields of construction, engineering, space exploration, and more, and strengthen our national defense,” the petition reads.

What could possibly go wrong? Oh, yea.

FILED UNDER: Uncategorized, , , ,
Doug Mataconis
About Doug Mataconis
Doug Mataconis held a B.A. in Political Science from Rutgers University and J.D. from George Mason University School of Law. He joined the staff of OTB in May 2010 and contributed a staggering 16,483 posts before his retirement in January 2020. He passed far too young in July 2021.

Comments

  1. Anderson says:

    I love it! I signed on, plus stealing your “that’s no petition” line for my blog.

    I’m just worried the GOP would gain control of the Death Star, and then threaten to blow up the planet every time the debt ceiling was up for renewal.

  2. gVOR08 says:

    Not seriously, but to make a point. Paul Krugman has talked about faking an alien invasion. Pearl Harbor pretty much got the whole country pulling together and doing massive deficit spending. Of course there are way better ways to spend the money, but the GOPs won’t allow any of them. If it’s the only way to get the Rs on board, a fake invasion or building a Death Star beats doing nothing. I’d even let them name it the USDS Ronald Reagan.

  3. grumpy realist says:

    Didn’t we have a posting some time back about how much material it would take to build a planet-sized Death Star?

  4. Anderson says:

    Paul Krugman has talked about faking an alien invasion.

    He’s copying Watchmen.

  5. Tillman says:

    @grumpy realist: Yes, we did. (see above)

    Death Stars are a horrendous waste of economic output, seeing as how all they do is blow up planets which I remind you all are sources of natural resources used in a variety of industries.

    Also, we don’t have the technology. I recall reading a geeky article that calculated just how much destructive power a Death Star would have to put out to destroy a planet, and despite the Cold War we still don’t have enough nukes to rival it.

  6. Just 'nutha ig'rant cracker says:

    @Tillman: That’s why it’s an economic and technogical stimulus. We didn’t have the technology to put a man on the moon in 1960 either…

  7. Whitfield says:

    This would have a very practical and needed use: to detect, deflect, and protect the earth from catastrophic asteroids and meteors. As of now, I do not think that we have much of a plan for this and there have been several near misses just in the last few years; that we know about.

  8. I find your lack of faith about this project disturbing.

  9. john personna says:

    And this is different from a manned Mars mission how?

  10. DC Loser says:

    Here’s the article from the Defense Acquisition University on the Death Star:

    http://www.dau.mil/pubscats/ATL%20Docs/Sep-Oct11/Ward.pdf

  11. Anderson says:

    “And this is different from a manned Mars mission how?”

    John, if you don’t get the difference between VISITING Mars and BLOWING UP Mars, then I don’t really know how to explain it to you.

  12. rodney dill says:

    Ancient weapons and hokey religions are no match for a good congressional spending boondoggle.