American Pie Star Natasha Lyonne Wanted for Dog Molestation

An arrest warrant has been issued for Natasha Lyonne charging her with, among other things, threatening to sexually molest a neighbor’s dog.

Arrest call for American Pie star (BBC)

An arrest warrant has been issued for American Pie actress Natasha Lyonne for failing to appear in court after allegedly threatening to molest a dog. Ms Lyonne, 26, played Jessica in the first two parts of the film trilogy. She was charged with criminal mischief, harassment and trespass last year after allegedly telling a neighbour: “I’m going to sexually molest your dog.”

And you thought molesting an apple pie was weird.

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James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is Professor and Department Head of Security Studies at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College and a nonresident senior fellow at the Scowcroft Center for Strategy and Security at the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm vet. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.


  1. My question is: who phrases a threat like that?

  2. Mark says:

    “and this one time…at band camp…”

    Yes, I realize Lyonne is not the band camp girl.

  3. Jack Tanner says:

    The dog saw the picture of her and yelped ‘Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!’

  4. the Pirate says:

    Wait a sec….its not Tara Reid?

  5. Brian J. says:

    It doesn’t look like there’s an actual charge of conspiracy to molest a dog, but that the charges stem from her bursting into the abode and making threats.

    The threat does have the spice, though, ainna?

  6. mike says:

    I have been picturing her in her movies all day – thanks

  7. bryan says:

    Yeah, “I’m going to sexually molest your dog” doesn’t just roll off the tongue, does it?

  8. Fernando says:

    Wouldn´t be easier if she said: “I´m going to fuck your dog.”? Or “I´m going to be fucked by your dog”? LOL