American Pie Star Natasha Lyonne Wanted for Dog Molestation

An arrest warrant has been issued for Natasha Lyonne charging her with, among other things, threatening to sexually molest a neighbor’s dog.

Arrest call for American Pie star (BBC)

An arrest warrant has been issued for American Pie actress Natasha Lyonne for failing to appear in court after allegedly threatening to molest a dog. Ms Lyonne, 26, played Jessica in the first two parts of the film trilogy. She was charged with criminal mischief, harassment and trespass last year after allegedly telling a neighbour: “I’m going to sexually molest your dog.”

And you thought molesting an apple pie was weird.

James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is Professor and Department Head of Security Studies at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College and a nonresident senior fellow at the Scowcroft Center for Strategy and Security at the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm vet. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.


  1. My question is: who phrases a threat like that?

  2. Mark says:

    “and this one time…at band camp…”

    Yes, I realize Lyonne is not the band camp girl.

  3. Jack Tanner says:

    The dog saw the picture of her and yelped ‘Noooooooooooooooooooo!!!’

  4. the Pirate says:

    Wait a sec….its not Tara Reid?

  5. Brian J. says:

    It doesn’t look like there’s an actual charge of conspiracy to molest a dog, but that the charges stem from her bursting into the abode and making threats.

    The threat does have the spice, though, ainna?

  6. mike says:

    I have been picturing her in her movies all day – thanks

  7. bryan says:

    Yeah, “I’m going to sexually molest your dog” doesn’t just roll off the tongue, does it?

  8. Fernando says:

    Wouldn´t be easier if she said: “I´m going to fuck your dog.”? Or “I´m going to be fucked by your dog”? LOL