Time for the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Monday, December 20, 2010
Winners will be announced Thursday
“I’m not sure, Abdul. I think it has something to do with a moose.”
“Last year we tried feeding it with crude oil, but all the needles fell off.”
I think we’re about 2000 years late with these gifts. I told you to ask for directions.
“There’s no point in complaining. It was either this or a menorah.”
“It was just sitting there in Rockefeller Center and my daughter absolutely HAD to have it.”
Relax, Masood, it’s just a way to make them think we like them. In a couple of months we’ll put up a rabbit, in July a hot dog, in November a turkey. Window dressing, Masood, window dressing.
“It’s called a Tree, Achmed. In America they have miilions of them. Don’t eat those fruit balls off them, though. It tastes like glass.
1) “If I brought the gold and you the myrrh, who’s got the frankincense?”
2) “Remember, it’s suppose to be a surprise. So whatever you do, don’t tip off Charlie Brown, okay?”
3) “Wow! That’s one big car-freshener!”
4) “And that’s just the air-freshener, now can you imagine the size of the camel you hang it on?”
Let me guess, Michael Moore is doing a film on Christmas.
… On the second day of Christmas,
Prince Faisal gave to me,
And a shopping mall in north New Jersey.
The Allahlujah Chorus.
Well, as I understand it Mukti, the story says that The Prophet, who lives at the northernmost mosque in the snow lands, gets into a flying carriage pulled by 8 tiny pegasi (pegasuses?) and then they fly around delivering presents to the emir’s children at midnight.
Look, Muhammad, how very wasteful they are! We have exactly 559 palms in our entire nation, Allah be praised, and they cut down some of their trees every year for religious decorations of some sort.
No, Muhammad it didn’t grow up that way in this place!
If we call C.A.I.R., they’ll help us to force the mall to rename it “Mohammed’s Mountain”.
Look, just take down the Star and replace it with a minaret. Then everything’s ‘kosher.’
I’m not sure but I think a guy named “Tannebaum” owns it.
A buddha buy da big tree?
“Why does that little winged girl have a tree up her ass?”
5) “What? A Christmas tree? Here? In Abu Dhabi? Man, this climate change is way more serious than I first thought.”
6) “You know what this means, don’t you? Next year, it’s our turn to bailout America.”
[…] Monday Contest has already opened all the presents. FILED UNDER: Contests, Rodney […]
7) “Don’t stare, Ahmed. It’s impolite. And for goodness sake, close your mouth.”
8) “I don’t know about that, Ahmed. I’m not so impressed. After all, if a rose can bloom in the desert, why not a 43-foot balsam fir? One apparently fully decorated with 14.3 million dollars — And I’m talking hard cash Euros on the oil barrel, here. Not those worthless USDs we’re still accepting — worth of Christmas ornaments!”
At ninety dollars per barrel, I figured it’s a token concession….
“What’s that way up at the top of the tree Mahmoud? Oh. My. Allah. (OMA), it’s a menorah!
[…] Shiite Christmas Edition OTB Caption ContestTM is now […]
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Caption Contest Winners