Caption Contest

Time for Thursday OTB Caption ContestTM



(AP Photo/Dario Lopez-Mills)

Winners will be announced Monday PM

FILED UNDER: Contests, ,
Rodney Dill
About Rodney Dill
Rodney is an IT Implementation Consultant in the Motor City and working within the Automotive Industry. He contributed to OTB from November 2004 until retiring in July 2017, hosting some 1200 OTB Caption Contests.

Comments

  1. elliot says:

    On switch, where is the On Switch?

  2. elliot says:

    Batteries not included.

  3. Bithead says:

    * To Imperialist US soldier:

    This not an Iranian Nuclear facility.

  4. Bithead says:

    * Dear Dad; Thanks for the new Stereo!

    * The new and improved Windows Control Panel

    * This does seem a bit much for a game console….

    * Error 794: Bang right fist and left shoe on any part of console to continue

    * OK, I admit it; there’s only a 286 at the heart of all this. But it does LOOK impressive, huh?

  5. Kenny says:

    “I’m afraid you’ve left a considerable carbon footprint … Dave.”

    Johnny figured he’d tricked the Star Trek writers, he was wearing blue after all, but on page seven he found his uncomfortable death scene.

    “Where’s that deaf, dumb and blind kid that plays a mean pinball?”

  6. “I felt like making a quick donut run, and was going to ask you to keep an eye on the monitors for me, but you were in the john. Be sure to keep an eye on the B-126 poump; it’s been showing some pressure fluctuations so you should be ready to SCRAM on short notice. I hope you like chocolate frosted cake donuts.”

  7. TheHat says:

    Error Index:”www.atomicpower/outofcontrol.com” not found…

    You can try again by typing the URL in the address bar or search the Web for “Kissyourassgoodbye.com”

  8. yetanotherjohn says:

    Scientist have been able to build a machine to model a woman’s emotional state. Manual not included.

  9. yetanotherjohn says:

    A worker is seen checking the shipping list for the Chernobyl style nuclear reactor sold to Iran with Bush’s blessing.

  10. Timmer says:

    “Latte, Mocha, Double Shot, Add Chai, Add Soy Milk…I just want a damn CUP OF COFFEE!!!”

  11. William d'Inger says:

    They forgot to include the Spanish language instruction sheet.

  12. Anderson says:

    “We asked it who the Republicans could nominate to guarantee Hillary loses in 2008, and it said … Bill Clinton?”

  13. William d'Inger says:

    ” … flour, sugar, milk, eggs, … DAMN, this is the recipe for disaster!”

  14. Brian says:

    Finally, reporters have the tool necessary to keep up with Milt Romney’s changing stories – the FLOPPER 2008!

  15. Maniakes says:

    “Where’s the ‘any’ key?”

  16. Paul Barnes says:

    Homer Simpson is lost in the new system.

  17. Roger says:

    1. “Whatever you do, don’t press the red button.”

    2. To borrow from a Lou Grant quote on the Mary Tyler Moore Show, “Do whatever you want to do kid, just don’t play with matches.”

    3. All these buttons and all I want to do is reheat a pizza. Friggin’ manual doesn’t say anything about that!

    4. Nigel was quite happy because this volume control went to 12.

  18. McGehee says:

    What your cell phone would look like if designed by the government.

  19. McGehee says:

    Flush handle, where’s the flush handle?

  20. McGehee says:

    “Well, there’s your problem — you can only run Windows 98 Second Edition on this puppy.”

  21. McGehee says:

    “Pong!? Not even Solitaire!?”

  22. McGehee says:

    “What does the printout say?”

    “It says, ‘Ask me again later.'”

  23. McGehee says:

    Part way through the design stage, once all the features demanded by the end user had been incorporated, the new model iPod was about to go through a modest downsizing process.

  24. Rodney Dill says:

    “Man, 193 steps just to be issued one sheet of toilet paper… these printed instructions aren’t gonna last long.”

  25. Michael says:

    “Up-Up-Down-Down-Left-Right-B-A-Start”

  26. Michael says:

    “Rule #1: Do not remove the cooling rods.”

    “Rule #2: DO NOT REMOVE THE COOLING RODS!!!”

    Tech: ah crap….

  27. Michael says:

    Tech: It’s the Large Hadron collider, Hadron!

    Boss: Oh, what was I calling it?

  28. On Fox this fall, Jeff Foxworthy’s hilarious new sitcom, “You Might Be a Nerd, If…”

  29. I think you may have the wrong photographer listed, or Mr. Lopez-Mills’ assignments just took a turn towrdas the mundane.

  30. Man, they misspelled “nukular” again.

  31. Rachel Edith says:

    Dear New Guy,

    It is the custom to furnish a letter of advice and helpful tips. But I was unfairly fired. Here are a few boss jokes, some pictures of naked ladies, a key to nothing and a small used crying towel.

    Good Friggin Luck!

  32. Pudge says:

    “According to our calculations,the universe will reach the end of it’s expansion as a result of the methane from 1 trillion more cattle,or, the next time Mike Moore goes to the Sizzler all-u-can-eat buffet.”

  33. mannning says:

    Houston, we have a problem…

    It says on page 17 if the Third Light goes red to press the ALT Button, but on page 21 it says to press the DUMP Button…

  34. Pudge says:

    “YES! Gin Rummy! I win Hal,you smarmy bastard!”

  35. Pudge says:

    “What do you mean there’s no hope? I don’t want my money back, I want a date!” -Computer dating before eharmony

  36. Pudge says:

    A technician tries to find a number,in the mass of zeros below 1, related to Ron Pauls odds of winning in ’08.

  37. Pudge says:

    “Oh man! The instructions are in every language but english.”

  38. “’42.’ What the hell does that mean?”

  39. Pudge says:

    This vintage photo captures a 1970’s era audiophile trying to balance his equalizer.

  40. Frank Picasso liked to refer to the night shift as his “blue period.”

  41. Pudge says:

    Ironically, the producer behind “Dark Side of the Moon” was actually learning on the job.

  42. Pudge says:

    Later in pre-production,they decided to tone down the role of the ships computer and let Cpt. Kirk dominate the screen instead.

  43. Cowboy Blob says:

    “Doctor Chandra…why are you frowning?”

    “You’ve got worms, HAL.”

  44. Bithead says:

    * The world’s first battery operated nuclear power plant control center.

    * John found himself alone in the Nuclear plant, with a sign on the door saying that the rest of the staff had ‘Gone Fission”.

    * Where are the nuclear wessals?

    * The world’s largest Fidonet BBS. 24 lines, no waiting.

    * And who hired the Smrufs to paint this place?

    * But Captain!! The Engines are cold!! We need at least 20 minutes for a pre-heat cycle!!!

    * Do you mean to say you never handled the controls yourself?

    * Whadda ya mean the whole thing is written in BASIC?

  45. Su Berton says:

    Dang! They forgot to give me the English Instructions.

  46. Su Berton says:

    Mutters to himself:
    Just look busy and no one will be the wiser. Pretend you know what you’re doing.

  47. Su Berton says:

    Step 1: First you press the yellow button
    Step 2: Wait 5 seconds
    Step 3: Depress the toggle switch on your right
    Step 4: Count to 3
    Step 5: Not that toggle switch you idiot! the one on your right, but at the top.
    Step 6: You got it, now count to 2
    Step 7: Press the 8 buttons at the bottom
    Step 8: one, two, three….eight, that’s right
    Step 9: Go for coffee and return in 15 minutes
    Step 10: Fifteen minutes are up. Now, where the hell are you!
    Step 11: Hey, no sleeping on the job.
    Step 12: Hmmm, get your instruction sheet
    Step 13: Now go back to step one and start all over again until you reach step 7
    Step 14: Man you’re dumb, I said step 7 not step 9

  48. Su Berton says:

    I thought you said you did this before?

  49. Su Berton says:

    Read the instructions, you say.
    Man I never read instructions.
    It goes against everything I believe in.
    Don’t worry, figuring this out will be a breeze.
    You can trust me.

  50. Cowboy Blob says:

    Turing Magazine centerfolds are in Binary.

  51. Michael says:

    My votes, not that they matter, in no particular order:

    “Turing Magazine centerfolds are in Binary.” – Cowboy Blob

    “Whadda ya mean the whole thing is written in BASIC?” – Bithead

    “’42.’ What the hell does that mean?” – charles austin

  52. Hermoine says:

    “Blah, blah, blah, blah. I am moving in with your brother. It worries me that you may do something stupid. Blowing up the city would be stupid. But it would be better than coming after Lester and me. So, do what you think is best.”

  53. McGehee says:

    ‘You must await confirmation from the National Command Authority before launching the missiles.’ Crap.”

  54. McGehee says:

    “Don’t buy a computer at the store, they said. You can build your own much cheaper, they said. @#$!!”

  55. Wyatt Earp says:

    1. “Mr. Burns, Homer Simpson left his work station. Wait, he left a note: “Gone drinkin’.”

    2. “Wait a minute. The rebels could destroy us if they hit this exhaust port! Who the hell designed this thing???”

  56. Deathlok says:

    Step 2 – Simply Press the button.

  57. Alan Kellogg says:

    Damn, they did make a mainframe just for porn.

  58. McGehee says:

    “Okay, I’ve got the engine started. Now how do I back out of the driveway? Dammit, I never should have bought a hybrid SUV.”

  59. McGehee says:

    “Adjust the toast setting to desired degree of crispness…”

  60. McGehee says:

    Many of us have forgotten how complicated it used to be to program a VCR.

  61. Rodney Dill says:

    “Now if I could just get it to stop blinking 12:00 I’d be all set.”

  62. Where in the hell is that Mac guy when I really need him?

  63. Congratulations on your purchase of Skynet! You can now look foward to days decades of security under Skynet’s protective umbrella…

  64. Christopher Lowell’s personal version of Hell.

  65. elliot says:

    Troubleshooting: ‘If all else fails, try checking the power plug on floor, duh’

  66. Brett says:

    And you thought that electronic voting would make things simpler. . .

  67. Bithead says:

    My God!
    A five MEG hard drive?

  68. elliot says:

    Hmmmmm, Electric bill. Yousa, $7359.00 Dollars!!!

  69. Deathlok says:

    Love for one’s computer has reached the trouble stage when you start color coordinating your wardrobe.