Thursday, August 4, 2005
Time for the Thursday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners will be announced Monday PM
Master’s taking me to the Y-M-C-A!
Please welcome Dog the Bounty Hunter… no, oh I’m sorry, we couldn’t afford his speaking fee, so I present to you “the dog bounty hunter.”
Jane Fonda needs to lay off the estrogen supplements before she hits the road in her veggie-bus.
The new Presidential Pooch gives Jenna Bush (and her liver) a scandal reprieve.
“Quit your gawking, kid. Haven’t you ever seen a police dog before?”
The Kink of Elton John — A Modern Musical
Dog: Ã¢Â€ÂœIf only this costume came with a gun so I can take care of the a-hole who put me in this and the guy who dresses Stevie Wonder.Ã¢Â€Â
CSI – ASPCA
On his trip in San Francisco, Allann doesn’t fear the policeman who promises to just “hold onto” the four hits of acid Allann has left.
It’s Cocker Spaniel time!
McGruff the Crime Dog after his turn in the barrel on Queer Eye for the Straight Guy.
There’s something about a dog in uniform that drives the ladies wild.
Introducing the DNC’s mascot for thier new national security initiative.
“If I could just reach behind my back and get the cell phone out of it’s pouch, I could call the ASPCA!”
It turns out that some corners were cut to achieve Clinton’s promise of 100,000 new police officers.
They called her spoiled. They hurt her when they combed cockle burrs out of her hair. They even called her a ‘Bitch’ when it was that time of the month. But she’s back now and she has a badge. So watch out postman when you walk on her street.
Leather, Handcuffs, Incognito? Just one word —
“In other news…The Pentagon today released a series of photos to counter liberal media bias in covering the Abu Ghraib prisoner abuse scnadal.”
And when you heard about the use of “police dogs” you thought they meant German Shepards.
In further efforts to cut costs, the FAA has announced that airport drug sniffing dogs will also be employed as air marshalls on transatlantic flights.
Introducing: Bondage Buffy!
“Get back honky cat!”
“You should see what he makes me wear on Saturday nights … “
TSA announces its anti-terrorism kennel-infiltration unit.
The resulting offspring of the liaison between a police dog and Cheech & Chong’s pet.
Yeah, go ahead and laugh, assholes. I can STILL lick my own balls!
“That’s a cat!? Damn — great disguise!”
It didn’t take long for the scientists working on the cloning of Rick James to see that something went horribly wrong.
PETA – eat ya’ heart out!
After The Rock grew out his hair, everything else in his life went downhill.
Further proof that Cocker Spaniel owners are a deeply disturbed segment of the population.
(Oh wait…we’re supposed to be joking, sorry)
The DNC has just released this photo of John Roberts’ pet pooch, noting that he had also been ADOPTED — from the San Francisco pound.
The Rocky Horror Picture Show has reached cult status with the cannine set.
Undercover K9 or
“Macho, macho mutt, I’ve got to be a macho mutt.”
“Dave’s not here, man.”
The Man’s best friend.
Police evidence: Canine Bordello
The dog known as Mistress Bitch
1. Conversation heard between two petowners at Poodle-Stop, the Doggy-Friendly eatery(TM).
“So who’s the bitch in your relationship….”
2. “Who let the dog’s out! Woof Woof”
3. Spike really enjoyed his sunglasses at the pet-eatery, being able to watch the other dogs uninterrupted. He always liked to eye the bitchs before sniffing their tails.
4. Tuffy the narc-dog always wondered what good would one pair of handcuffs be when needed to cuff a four-legged dog.
* The handcuffs? They’re all for show. You won’t WANNA run away from ME, honey….
* Even the Hollywood execs were getting antsy when they were shown the concept for the latest remake of “Serpico”
* Don Bleuth never met THIS fella.
* Not only was Harry a police dog, but he had a different meaning for the phrase “Family Tree”
* Forget threatening them with arrest. I’ll just crap in their shoe.
* CPU : Cannine Patrol Unit
* Do you now, or have you ever owned an eletric dog polisher?
* I’m here to break up the illegal poker game. These guys are so crass, they’re having paintings made!
Christina Aguilerra’s hair-stylist finally crosses the proverbial line.
Snoop the Crime Dogg waits for Lee Iacocca to pull the car around.
We at the AKC remain firmly opposed to species profiling.
‘Round the ‘Sphere: August 6, 2005
Looking for something good to read? Let me help you out…
Muffy’s owners never realized the deleterious effects of allowing her to watch too much South Park, until the day she started swinging a nightstick around and howling “Respect mah author-uh-tay!”
Let’s see, Bulletproof vest, check, handcuffs, check, radio, check, and the kitty cat sunglasses, check. Animal planet most talented animals here I come. No pictures please….darn Papparazzi!!!
Meet Fabio the new body guard for Paris Hilton’s shake and piss dog Tinker bell.
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