Monday, June 9, 2003
Time for another OTB Caption ContestTM:
“Stare at it all you want, but unless you start sucking you can kiss that fifth star goodbye.”
I was going to do a Coneheads joke, but after Lawrence’s, there’s just no point.
“I didn’t want to be the one to have to tell you this General, but your deoderant is not working.”
“Ok, I’ll sing the lead and you sing the
‘Ooo wah, ooo wah cool, cool kitty
Tell us about the boy from New York City’ part.”
The main event from Wrestlemania 82…
“And then the appointed President said, ‘if I actually get elected for real this time, can I run again?'”
“If you retire and go to work at CNN…I’ll have you killed.”
I bow before Laurence Simon’s contribution…I wouldn’t try to box with Ali…
I don’t think I can compete with Laurence, but from the look on Franks’ face, it doesn’t look like he can compete with Bush.
Yeah, Laurence wins.
I’d love to know what they really said to each other to get those looks. Intriguing.
AP BREAKING … Ari Fleisher announced today that due to skin cancer concerns that a growth would be removed from President Bush’s forehead on Wednesday. Later, when pressed with questions about his health the President would only respond lightheartedly, saying, “You should have seen the one that looked like Dick Cheney they scraped of my bu……”
“Tommy, it would please the wife if you would come to her Tupperware Party.”
That’s why a President out-ranks a General, Tommy.
Hillary said she’s on our side.
“Your fly is open.”
(oops should have read)
AP BREAKING … Ari Fleisher announced today that due to skin cancer concerns that a growth would be removed from President Bush’s forehead on Wednesday. Later, when pressed with questions about his health the President would only respond lightheartedly, saying, “You should have seen the one that looked like Dick Cheney they scraped off my bu……”
Usually a master at the practical joke, President Bush failed miserably with the superglue-the-salute-to-the-forehead gag, when he said, “Hey, Tommy, you dropped a quarter.”
“Sorry Tommy, we’ve decided not to invade any other nations until after the re-election.”
“Ok, hot stuff. Find those weapons. One way or another. Those weapons need to turn up. Soon.”
You’re just a General, I’m the Commander-in-Chief, and I say you were the one that farted.
*snicker* “Don’t stare Tommy, but I think I see real cobwebs around Old Auntie Helen’s crotch”
You have the taco’s for lunch too?
“I’m sorry I didn’t call, George.”
WOW, yours realy is bigger. I never would have thought.
Do you really think they are going to let us get away with this on TV?
Come on now, I’m the president!
Never overlook an opportunity to pump ship.
(Duke of Wellington, to newly commissioned officers.)
“Khaki really isn’t your color.
It did wonders for me.”
U.S. General Tommy Franks falters during an intense contest with President Bush to determine, once and for all, who can hold their breath the longest.
” Yep, Tommy, I see you’ve found what I like to call my Weapon of Ass Destruction.”
“I’m from Texas. Everything is bigger there.”
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