My law partner, Jackie Chiles, tells me we’re all going to get rich when the jury sees what the Golden Arches did to your bodies. We’re cashing in oun your wretched disfigurement.
Emerging from a meeting with the Libyan chair of the Human Rights Panel, Kofi Annan stops in to congratulate the successful nominees for the 2004 United Nations Panel For World Hunger.
“Congratulations, mon. You just set da record by drinking 100 Red Stripes in one setting. Hooray obesity!”
“Where are our chairs? And what’s that pain in my ass?”
Now which one of you was Patsy and which one was Patrick?
“Would you like to eat me? I am wafer thin!”
“Damn! I could fit up inside your left tit!”
“You know what turns me on? A really really fat crotch.”
Trevor searched in vain for the bellboy, trying to ignore the meaty burps of the two fatties.
My law partner, Jackie Chiles, tells me we’re all going to get rich when the jury sees what the Golden Arches did to your bodies. We’re cashing in oun your wretched disfigurement.
“Excuse me, are you two, tons of fun?”
“No, but my friend here is.”
“Pardon me, may I squeeze through?”
“Sure, but first you’ll have to take the ‘c’ out of truck and the ‘f’ out of way.”
(hint: Don’t think it, say it)
“The director meets the stars of Subway’s 2004 advertising campaign.”
The 2003 OUTSIDEtheBELTway winner and runner-up.
Oh my God!
Emerging from a meeting with the Libyan chair of the Human Rights Panel, Kofi Annan stops in to congratulate the successful nominees for the 2004 United Nations Panel For World Hunger.
For Coasties: Hey, where can I find a good sailmaker around here?
For Sountherners: My brother, the cotton farmer, extends his heartfelt thanks for the business.
“Oh ok guys I think I can get 30 million each from McDonalds for your obesity.”
My blogroll is bigger than yours.
Two men await a chance to audition for the coveted role of the federal budget during the filming of a new children’s documentary on the US government.
Michael Moore on the set of his new film.
“Hello, boys and girls, today I’ve asked two of my associates to help demonstrate today’s science lesson, continental drift…”
“Excuse me, I think you might be sitting on my sandwich”
“Please let me know when you’ll be needing a lift, ummmmmm, you know, forklift.”
Pardon me, “Slim”, but I’m afraid Mr. Hindenberg here is sitting on my child.
And you, Tony, how long have you had to sit to pee?
I’m afraid I don’t know how to inform your friend here, but pleats are passe. Not that anyone’s looking….
“It’s good to meet someone who understands the importance of putting plenty of Cheez Whiz on their Philly chessesteaks.”
“Excuse me. Which one of you is named Small-fry?”