Monday, December 12, 2005
Time for the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners will be announced Thursday PM
I’m, a marine and here is my trigger finger dammit! I say peace and I just use it to pick my nose now!
Alright who is the SOB who put a white flag on my birthday cake?
Dont you call me a French coward. I’m not French!
ONE! Singular sensation, every move that she makes.
Despite several attempts, John’s trainers still couldn’t get him to use the correct finger.
“I said pull my finger, dammit!”
This, Children, is what a surrender monkey looks like. Can anyone tell us what party he’s a member of?
That’s right, for just $10 each, you too can get one of these beautiful leather-bound copies of The Communist Manifesto. Please make checks out to the DNC.
Hey, look at this booger! Even IT has a better exit strategy for Iraq than GW Bush!
This is the number of months I am willing to wait for an Iraq timetable. It is also the number of seconds it would take me to kill you with your steno pad. It is ALSO the number of weeks it has been since I had a nice bowel movement.
Notice, please… his finger is NOT purple, like those of most Iraqis
SMELL MY FINGER DAMMIT!
“Let me see if I can get this straight. He is Ole, you are Sven?”
Well, then why don’t you pass THIS along to Lieberman!
Straying far off-topic, Rep. Murtha demonstrated the way Dr. Howard Dean gave prostate exams.
“I could kill this entire press corps with this here one finger…”
“And Pelosi kept poking me… real vigorously like this. Poke. Poke. Poke. I finally told the bitch to stop it…”
“Well if my middle finger wasn’t shot off in the war…”
I just pulled this finger out of my backside and I’m, going to put it right back!
“Who am I? Why am I here?”
“I tell you, if I’d been there with John Kerry when he threw his medals over the fence, why I’d have given him a medal for doing it… Of course, then he’d still have another medal to throw, so … um … there you have it.”
Relax George, this won’t hurt a bit!
Murtha: “This is not the troop redeployment resolution you’re looking for…”
Republicans: “Nice try, but you’re no Jedi.”
“Yeah, well, you wanna see my response to Lieberman? It’s … it’s … damn arthritis! …”
* After being removed from congress, Murtha spent a short time as a spokesman for Kentucky Fried Chicken. (think about it)
* See my Point?
* Here’s pointing at you kid!
An enraged Murtha demonstrated how he gave Lieberman an impromptu prostate exam.
The ACLU, baffled by the court’s decision, vowed to stop the legalization of UFIA
“”I knew Santa Claus; Santa Clause was a friend of mine. You, sir, are no Santa Clause.”
The next Bond movie was announced with Murtha as Moldfinger and Howard Dean as Wussie Galore
You shouldn’t call me french buddy. My CO called me French once….Once! Fargin Bastiges
“…and stick it your ear and go tingle-lingle-loo…” (Benny Hill fans immediately recognize this)
“I hid this uncomfortable piece of flesh up my ass for two years. Then, after seven years, I was sent home to my family. And now, America, I give the finger to you.”
It’s all fun and games until somebody loses an eye-lection.
“We’re down to one decent Democrat left in the Senate, but we’ll take care of him soon enough.”
“We can pretend this is a flagpole if anybody has a little white flag I can tie to it.”
“Why yes, I am a spokesman for Viagra. Why do you ask?”
Congressman Murtha demonstrates the stern gestures that accompany the strongly worded resolutions of the UN when it comes to Iran and its nuclear ambitions.
“And if Joe Lieberman comes near me again with his Bush cheerleading I’m going to show him how Marines are trained to kill with one finger.”
“Well, I lick my finger and hold it up into the wind like this whenever I lack the moral courage or clarity to do the right thing.”
Murtha asks the U.S.A. to bend over.
And then the bulging vein suddenly burst. The normally reserved Murtha became a casualty of his own three solid weeks of endless outrage and rants. His wife stated she was unsure if this was his exit strategy.
“Yeah, and Merry Christmas to you too, Dick Cheney.”
Murtha begins to count the number of Congressman that voted for his ‘bring home the troops now’ bill. He just needs the one hand.
How did I get this blister?
“and no one tells me turn my head and cough dammit”
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