Caption Contest

Time for the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM

(AFP/Andreas Solaro)

Winners will be ordained Thurdays PM

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Rodney Dill
About Rodney Dill
Rodney is an IT Implementation Consultant in the Motor City and working within the Automotive Industry. He contributed to OTB from November 2004 until retiring in July 2017, hosting some 1200 OTB Caption Contests.


  1. Special Hair Growing Cap Only Works A Third Of The Time.

  2. …and here we have the Catholic Church’s entry in the synchronized “I’m a Little Teapot” competition, which is slated to be an exhibition sport at the summer Olympics…

  3. FormerHostage says:

    Three little maids from school are we,
    Pert as a school-girl well can be,
    Filled to the brim with girlish glee,
    Three little maids from school!

    (Apologies to G*d and Gilbert and Sullivan)

  4. Maggie says:

    Totally bored with the homily The Cardinals play their improvised version of “Duck, duck, goose”.

  5. Maggie says:

    Sticky red beanies prove Bryl Cream and Holy Water don’t mix.

  6. Eric J says:

    “Oh, Mammy, howIloveya howIlovya…”

  7. yetanotherjohn says:

    I hate performance art. I just never seem to get it.

  8. legion says:

    “And in an attempt to recruit more young men into the preisthood, the Pope has just announced the formation of the Blue Man Archdiocese…”

  9. wavemaker says:

    (together)…”and that ain’t aaaaaaaallllllllll….”

  10. DaveD says:

    And Jorge Savino is the next Cardinal eliminated in the College’s “Survivor: The Vatican” for erring in protocol by taking his beanie off while reading the Latin liturgy.

  11. Hermoine says:

    “From out of the woodwork come thousands of people claiming to be graduates of George Mason University.”

  12. Daniel says:

    I got hair, you no got hair.

  13. legion says:

    “Simon says read your book. Simon says put your hand on your head. Take your hat off. AH-HA! You’re out, Father O’Malley – I didn’t say ‘Simon Says’!”

  14. Darby Shaw says:

    We…..represent the Papal guild, the Papal guild and we like to welcome you to the Holy land!

  15. Kent says:

    Representatives of the Vatican illustrate their opposition to cap-ital punishment.

  16. McCain says:

    When praying for Bill Clinton, one cardinal is never enough.

  17. John Burgess says:

    Okay, now follow the pea…

  18. LorgSkyegon says:

    In order to attract newer, hipper cardinals, the Catholic Church has relaxed it’s rules on wearing zucchettos backwards.

  19. FormerHostage says:

    (for Stooge fans)

    Left Cardinal: “Hellooooooo”
    Center Cardinal (one octave higher): “Hellooooooo”
    Right Cardinal (one more octave higher): “Hellooooooo”
    All Three: “Hello!”

  20. FormerHostage says:

    In unison: “I could’a had a V8!”

  21. Ingress says:

    American Idol Group winners, The Cardinals, give their boffo performance of I’m A Little Teapot.

  22. McGehee says:
  23. SgtFluffy says:

    Yea and God said unto them….”How do you like dem apples”….

  24. McCain says:

    At Target Greatland in Vatican City, the “Pauper Poper Pooper”, retail $74.95, was divinely prosperous.

  25. McGehee says:

    Oh, we’re the boys of the chorus
    We hope you like our show
    We know you’re rooting for us
    But now we have to goooooooooooo…

  26. McGehee says:

    “Ladies and gentlemen, how about a nice warm welcome for the Vatican City Synchronized Beanie Drill Team, the newest entrant in this year’s Burbank Doo-Dah Parade!”

  27. “St. Louis Bullpen Showing Their Age.”

  28. ken says:

    You put your red hat in
    You pull your red hat out
    You put your red hat in
    And you shake it all about…

  29. Roger Ridenour says:

    SAT question #163: Which one is different?

  30. Elmo says:

    A) Itching powder? D*mn altar boys!
    B) CUT! For the last guys time it’s see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil. It’s right there in the script.
    C) How do you do. No, how do you do. No …. how do you do (nyuk, nyuk).
    D) It says here: insert beanie a) on head b). But I can’t figure out the diagram, how are you guys doing?

  31. Bithead says:

    It was at that point that they all shuffled on to the Buffalo Archdiocesse.

  32. Scott_T says:

    (all reading instruction in their book)
    12. Take your hat off.
    13. Laugh-out-loud at something funny you’ve seen. (3 old men laughing heard)
    14. Attempt to fart (3 beet-red faces seen)
    15. Swear out loud. (3 Irish men cursing heard, and quite a few nuns blushing uncontrollably at hearing it)
    16. Close the book and sign your name on the back cover and don’t do steps 2-15.

    Instruction #1. Read all directions thoughly before doing anything.

  33. Scott_T says:

    God? Why couldn’t that artist of done that Brittany Spears artwork on this rung instead of that bear-skin. Minus the baby of course.

  34. Rachel Edith says:

    The winner of The Jack Anderson-As-A-Cardinal Lookalike Contest was entry number three.

  35. Hodink says:

    It was a bit surprising to see where Dick (Is That A Gun In Your Pocket?) Cheney had been hiding.

  36. McCain says:

    “Ok, here’s the concept… after the phone rings, the host will say deal or no deal while 50 completely dressed old geezers randomly reveal biblical passages … whaddaya think? whaddaya think?”

  37. ken says:

    Strip poker, Vatican style…

  38. FreakyBoy says:

    Still reeling financially from numerous child molestation lawsuits, Cardinals raise church funds by scamming tourists with a unique version of three card monty on the streets of Vatican City.

  39. Three Cardinal monte still gets the tourists at St. Peter’s every friggin’ time.

  40. Adjustah says:

    Just another day of target practice at the Cheney Ranch…