Gay Military Economics

Scott Adams argues that gays in the military is inevitable owing to the equilibrium of the free market:

Today’s review of the headlines informs me that a sex offender tried to acquire an ice cream truck. In unrelated news, American Idol winner Ruben Studdard successfully sued his ex-manager for stealing money and credit cards.

These stories fit neatly into my economic theory that most salesmen of women’s shoes have foot fetishes. The theory is simple: People go wherever they can most easily fulfill their needs. Sex offenders go where the kids are: ice cream trucks and churches. Criminals go where the money is: banks, CEO jobs, convenience stores, and celebrities.


Based on the same economic theory, I predict that someday our entire military will be gay. If people are shooting at you, it goes down a lot easier if you’re huddling in a foxhole with a chiseled 20-year old and you can use lines such as, “Bruce, we might die today. But before we go…”


FILED UNDER: LGBTQ Issues, Uncategorized,
James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is Professor of Security Studies at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm veteran. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.


  1. /snark on

    Maybe in the navy where you are at sea for months, but in the air force female companion ship shouldn’t be that far away.

    /snark off

  2. DC Loser says:

    I don’t know about gays in the military, but completely understand the womens shoe salesman bit šŸ˜›