Mitt Romney To Fight Evander Holyfield For Charity
With future Presidential ambitions apparently out of the picture, Mitt Romney appears to be moving on to a new career:
Forget about Manny Pacquiao and Floyd Mayweather, the real fight of the century is scheduled for May 15 when Mitt Romney enters the ring to battle Evander Holyfield in Salt Lake City.
Yes, you read that right. Romney, the former Massachusetts governor, and Holyfield, the five-time heavyweight titleholder who smacked around the likes of Mike Tyson and George Foreman, are going to lace up gloves and duke it out in a charity exhibition.
However, Romney has no delusions about actually winning this contest.
“It will either be a very short fight, or I will be knocked unconscious,” Romney told the Salt Lake City Tribune. “It won’t be much of a fight. We’ll both suit up and get in the ring and spar around a little bit.”
A portion of the proceeds will help support Charity Vision, which provides doctors and facilities in poverty-stricken areas with equipment and resources to carry out eye operations.
Romney may be on to something here. I’m betting a lot of people would pay good money to watch politicians get hit by retired boxers. Heck, maybe we could even use this to help pay down the national debt.
I guess Romney likes losing at anything…not just elections.
Why does anyone bother to write fiction anymore?
I’d pay serious money if it were a real match. Unfortunately it’s a sparring demo. When he says, “It will either be a very short fight, or I will be knocked unconscious,” Romney’s lying. Imagine that.
Oh, come on, I think it’s cool of Romney. It’s a good cause, it’s an amusing gimmick, and in no way makes me think this is Step #1 on the road to a nationwide contest of teenagers fighting for food. Go District 12!
@michael reynolds:
Agree. The cause is good, and it’s a funny gimmick. Why not?
@CSK:
I do hope they’ve got him in head gear, though. A lot of people don’t realize that a professional boxer’s punch is not the same punch that gets thrown in a bar brawl. Holyfield could literally kill Romney before Romney could fall to the canvas.
Which would be funny, too, but in a rather darker vein.
The Republicans should adopt a more free-form brawl to help winnow down the field in their primary. See who really wants it, and what they are willing to do.
Because, one of the key qualities we look for in a leader is someone who is tough, strong, and willing to make hard choices quickly. Basically, someone who is willing to beat someone unconcious with a folding chair.
The Man Who Beat Foreman
versus
The Mormon!
@Pinky:
Or…
Holy Field versus Holy Underwear
I tried so hard not to click on this headline…
“It will be a very short fight,” Romney told the Salt Lake City Tribune. “It won’t be much of a fight. I’ve been training for three years for this. I’m in the best shape of my life. Come after me in SLC? I’ll drop you. Evander’s a has-been. It’s my time now.”
“Remember Denver? I had the sitting president on the ropes all night. Punishment time”, Romney added emphatically, “punishment time!”
@Tillman: I clicked on it to hear the punchline.
Bizarre. And I predict…a bit awkward too.
Head or gut?