Monty Python’s Fellowship of the Ring

Monty Python’s Fellowship of the Ring.

Frodo: Don’t disturb this foul pool!
Boromir: Sorry, I thought I saw something moving out there…
Pippin: I’ve got it! Why don’t we say the word “friend” in every language we can think of!
Gandalf: Oh, fool of a Took! Don’t be ridiculous!
Legolas: What a loon!
Gimli: Silly hobbit, it wouldn’t be THAT simple!
Pippin: I guess it does sound rather moronic…
Gandalf: I know! Why don’t we use the Holy Hand Grenade of Elendil!
Frodo: The what?
Gandalf: The Holy Hand Grenade of Elendil. ‘Tis one of the several dozen relics of Isildur that Aragorn lugs around with him.
Boromir: Yes. Of course.
Gandalf: (shouting) Aragorn, get out the Holy Hand Grenade!
Frodo: How does it, um– how does it work?
Gandalf: Well, I don’t know.
Aragorn: Hold on, I think I’ve got an instruction manual in here somewhere… Right! The Noldor Book of Armaments!


Hat tip: John Hudock

James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is Professor and Department Head of Security Studies at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College and a nonresident senior fellow at the Scowcroft Center for Strategy and Security at the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm vet. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.


  1. Jen Speaks says:

    FOTR As Told By Monty Python
    You know this is funny stuff (written by Scandinavians, hence the odd spellings and characters):

    J.R.R. Tolkien’s: Fellowship of the Ring

    J.R.R. Tølkiën’s: Fëløwshipti uv den RÃ¥ingen

    Written by:
    Hstaphath – The Official Bard of XenoCorp

  2. Monty Python’s JRR Tolikien’s Fellowship of the Ring
    And now for something completely different…(Courtesy Outside the Beltway)…