Time for the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Monday, September 23, 2013
(Official White House Photo by David Lienemann)
Winners will be announced after Friday PM.
“Same-sex ballroom dancing lessons are a key part of the Navy’s revamped sensitivity training. Yes, there was some slight hit to combat effectiveness to pay for this, but proponents contend that it’s a key part of building the more mindful, emotionally sensitive military of the future.”
Just listen for a minute! We could put a davenport over there, with a lovely duvet. Televisions are dreadfully ugly, but if you insist it could be across the room by the kitchen. Oh Herb, I think we can do this!!
“I’m sorry, sir, but we’re now entering US Territorial Waters. Please undress and stand over there while we get the scanner warmed up.”
“In your honor, Mr. Vice President, we’ve renamed this part of the ship the ‘Biden Deck.'”
“That’s quite an honor. What was it called before?”
“The poop deck.”
(with apologies to James Carville)
When asked, the sailor pointed to the nearby life preservers to be tossed should a sailor fall overboard. He discreetly didn’t point to the latest addition in case Vice President Biden fell overboard — a handy anchor.
Yes Mr. President, the safety line was installed after Mr. Biden went overboard. We continue searching.
“OK, sailor, here’s what you do: if those guys in the boats were pirates, you take a shotgun and fire two blasts straight up into the air. I guarantee you that’ll scare them off.”
“Um… Mr. Vice President… if we shoot straight up in here, we’ll hit the deck above us.”
“That’s the point. If we’re willing to do that to ourselves, just imagine what we’ll do to them!”
You put your left foot in, you put your left foot out, you put your left in and you stick it in your mouth.
Yes sir, if an unknown ship approaches us we open this hatch and fire two shotgun blasts into the air.
Yes sir, it is a pretty big f*cking ship.
Shall we dance?
I believe we “buried” Vince Foster over there, sir.
“What part of ‘underwater submarine door’ doesn’t make sense to you? They can’t fly in here, you moron!”
“Yes Sir, it was somewhere in this area here that we think they buried Obamacare.”
“Sir, where would you like us to hang the ‘Syrian Mission Accomplished’ sign?”
We’re going to honeymoon on a cruise?! That’s FABulous!
Prone to exaggeration, nobody really believed the Veep’s yarn that he was rescued at sea with a Bengal tiger, but The Life of Bi was a smashing box office hit.
And the divan will be right over there
“Yes, sir. We have captured the speaker, here comes the Seal team now, the budget and debt ceiling negotiations can begin, please follow me to the negotiation chamber.”
Uncle Joe: “….ok….now IF these cranes can lift Hillary and IF her and her cankles will fit out this door……”
“Alright, I’ve seen enough. Let’s surface.”
“…we’re not a submarine, sir.”
“Nonsense, look out the window, everything’s the same color!”
“That’s–it’s just–but it’s–”
“Damn it, son, I won’t tell you twice! BLOW MAIN BALLAST!”
“Mr. Vice President, there’s a lot we can do.”
“In the Navy?”
“Yes, you can sail the seven seas.”
“In the Navy?”
“*Sigh* Yes, you can put your mind at ease.”
“In the Navy?”
“*Sigh* No, Mr. Vice President, that joke NEVER gets old.” (muttering): “Hillary better get the nomination. I can’t take another four years of that joke.”
That’s quite a picture window you’ve got there, Captain.
@Tillman: “No Sir… That’s not what ‘EMERGENCY BLOW’ really means.”
Biden wants you!! Biden wants you!! Biden wants you as a new recruit!!!
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