Time the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Monday, January 26, 2015
Winners for this contest will be announced next weekend.
Am I supposed to do this, or bow, I can’t remember?
Hi Guys – so check it out, I can bend that spoon over there with my mind…
Why won’t word press let me post?
Ok, if you can do that on one foot we’ll let you drive…….
WP, the ultimate heckler. Can’t take criticism either
Please dear God, help me to not screw this up.
Praying that the Secret Service doesn’t embarrass me on this trip probably won’t help, but it can’t hurt either.
Remember, don’t call them Stan and Oliver!
RAMA LAMA DING DONG…
The Indian Rodney Dangerfield, “Hey, I get no rice back…I get no rice back…I usually get no rice at all. Hey!”…
Obama: “I have a funny joke for you. A nervous man goes to a doctor. He tells the doctor, “I’m a Teepee, I’m a Wigwam…I’m a Teepee, I’m a Wigwam…”The doctor tells the man. “Calm down. You’re two tents…”
Indian Ambassador: “We’re not that type of Indians…”
Hare Krishmas and Rama Lama New Year!
Plowboys & Indians…
Indians come to America seeking a foreign aid loan….Next stop, The Lone Arranger….
“I’m sorry I asked you guys if you wanted a hamburger. I didn’t mean to offend you. Don’t have a cow…”
@OzarkHillbilly: I don’t see anything pending moderation.
@Paul Hooson: Nothing to see here. just moooove along.
Indian Ambassador: “You have many sacred cows in this country?”
Obama: “Yes, mostly in the federal budget..”
Obama: “I have a sacred cow….Her name is Michelle”.
Indians come to America with the dream to buy a motel…
“Hey, I see two future cab drivers here…”
“Wow, they sure went on the warpath when they were told that they couldn’t open a casino…”
“Hey just level with me. Isn’t paneer cheese really just tofu?”
@Rodney Dill: I don’t know why it happens but it usually only does it for 1 or 2 attempts and adding or subtracting something breaks the cycle after which I can post at will. This time, nothing seemed to work. Even after I got a post thru, WP still wouldn’t allow a joke. It reached comic tragedy levels, except of course to those who were saved from reading my bad jokes. For them it was a godsend.
Let’s see Boehner do this!
“Please don’t let Biden open his mouth about 7-11s.”
Obama: “What’s the secret to good Indian cooking?”
Indian Ambassador: “It’s mostly the element of surprise….You take something mild like peas…Then pour in a ton of red hot spices to point of being ridiculous…”
“I’m sorry, but KWIK E MART aren’t selling franchises….”
Obama: “With your sacred cows, that must make it hard on people into leather bondage gear in your country?”
Indian Ambassador: “What?”
“Hold on a second, guys. I just gotta do a little something here in front of a camera to make conservative heads explode.”
“Hey, you guys know Babu from Seinfeld?”
“Which way to Bollywood?”
“So where’s my ‘Maharishi Barack’ badge?”
“If Biden shows up, I think I’m gonna be Sikh.”
“I’d like my legacy to include a PETA start-up here.”
“Let’s caste aside our differences & rule the Varnas together!”
“Prayer blessings from the ancestral home of Orange Spray Tan.””
OK John, I’ll see your 8 million Israelis and raise you 1 and a quarter BILLION Indians.
Obama: “Allah, the munificent, Allah…wait, what? You have holy cows here?”
Obama prayer: “Kama sutra, Kama sutra, Kama sutra…”
Obama thought bubble: “When do I get to go to Bollywood?”
“Some of my jokes are making people Sikh this week…”
“Sikh and ye shall find…”
“Let’s play hide and go Sikh”
“Cute, Barack. Now shake hands like a normal person.”
Obama: “Why am I the only one laughing at my wigwam joke?”
Indian Ambassador: “Your Cadillacs, not a bad car…..But, our Tata Nano, well, that’s a really bad car…”
“I miss the Hindustan Ambassador…”
That’s what Obama does before he whoops up on somebody!
Obama is just finding out what happens when you go to sleep with an itchy booty!!!
Obama (in sing-song voice): “How big is Brahma?”
@Paul Hooson: I didn’t notice your earlier entry which is similar to my first entry. To really mash up the Indian confusion, we could make this joke: “Why do Indians wear turbans? To keep their wigwam!”
P.S. It must be difficult for Rodney to wade through similar entries and judge them on their own merit.
“Very amusing impression of that Oswald Cobblepot guy from GOTHAM!”
“So, guys, I’ve got a hankerin’ for a sandwich, and the guys on the plane were talking about some New Delhi?”
I told a lot of Sikh jokes this week…
The Indian version of ABC’s SCANDAL is called SANDAL…
After having a burning hot and spicy meal at an Indian restaurant, Paul McCartney was influenced to call his new album, “BAND WITH THE RUNS”.
The United States had the New Deal, but India has the New Delhi…
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