Ten Reasons to Vote for Hillary Clinton

I just received a press release entitled, “Ten reasons to vote for Hillary Clinton for president.”

Mike Wiley, author of the new non-fiction book “Diary of Hillary’s Right Wing Conspirator”, has just placed on his “freedom” website a “David Letterman” style Ten Reasons to vote for Hillary Clinton, so that Americans who are too busy paying for the free health care of illegal immigrants, can get the message. And here they are:

1) Destruction of Israel — They cause trouble all the time, we won’t miss them. There only Jews, right Hillary!

2) Acceleration of world terrorism — World Socialists need Terrorists to keep America in check.

3) Nuclear Proliferation of North Korea, Iran and Syria — Hillary supports Nuclear power for the new “Axis of Evil”

4) $5.00 per gallon gas – I take the subway so I don’t care and the states need the tax revenues.

5) End of talk radio. If no one is going to voluntarily listen to Left Wing radio then no one will be allowed to listen to conservative radio.

6) Mandatory Health Care — Hey its free, no one pays for it right?

7) Mandatory gun control — Then only the criminals will have guns and half the problem will be solved.

8) Texas will be given to Mexico — One less Red State to lose.

9) Communist Chinese will run all our ports — They donate more to the Clintons, then the Arabs did.

10) Bill Clinton to be the First Male First Lady — Unemployment of interns will be lower.

This is some embarrassing, ungrammatical nonsense.

I’m hardly a fan of Hillary Clinton or the Democrats but is simply outrageous to charge that she favors 1, 2, 8, or 9. As to the others:

    4. Hillary doesn’t take the subway. She’s rich and has a driver. It’s true that many Democrats think we should tax gasoline at confiscatory rates to get the prices up to European and Japanese levels and force conservation and the search for alternative energy.

    5. I’m not sure of her position on talk radio but there is a significant segment of Democrats who would like to see the reinstatement of the Fairness Doctrine, which would have something like this effect.

    6. It’s true that she favored some variant of a single payer system, although I’m not sure of her exact policy stance now.

    7. Glib but not entirely out of bounds.

    10. Okay, he’s got me on this one.

Surely, we can find legitimate reasons why conservatives might be opposed to Hillary Clinton without making up nonsense?

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James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is a Security Studies professor at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College and a nonresident senior fellow at the Scowcroft Center for Strategy and Security at the Atlantic Council. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm vet. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.

Comments

  1. Frank J. says:

    Her thighs are huge! Who can vote for thighs that big?

  2. Steven Plunk says:

    Like the top ten lists on Letterman these are meant to be humorous. Conservatives can be humorous but it’s not entirely natural to us. That would explain the awkwardness of the list.

    As for real reasons not to vote for her, let’s wait until she’s running to put that together.

  3. askjhf says:

    4. Hillary doesn�t take the subway. She�s rich and has a driver.

    Correct. You should also point out that it is the Republican Michael Bloomberg who takes the subway every day to work and also happens to be richer than Hillary–by a landslide.

  4. McGehee says:

    Conservatives can be humorous but it�s not entirely natural to us.

    <snicker>

  5. Mike Wiley says:

    The number 4 comment is that of most Blue State Liberals who take the subway. We of course know Hillary has a limousine, she runs down police officers with it, remember.

    Item 1 is true, read the book, get educated