Tiger Shoots Two Eagles
I’d say Tiger Woods is back. In his first tournament back after months of scandal and “rehab” for his “sex addiction,” he showed up and shot two eagles in his first round. At the frickin’ Masters.
The only way I could shoot two eagles in one afternoon is to take my 12-gauge to the zoo. Or maybe to a football game in Philadelphia. But, since I’d never do either of those things, the chances of my replicating Tiger’s feat are slim.
UPDATE: Interesting naturalistic sidebar: Eagles are monogamous and mate for life. (h/t sportspickle)
Like gays or lesbians, or my brothers and sisters, I have no interest in their sex lives. Don’t even tell me.
Yeah, but how are you at nailing cocktail waitresses?
I’m sure it’s nice for him to get back to what he does best (or, uh, one of the things he does best, if some of those headlines from cocktail waitresses are to be believed).
It’s pretty amazing how little effect the media maelstrom, following what some Nike flack called a “Nixonian” fall from grace, had on his game.
Too bad with all the TMZ stuff, the day’s really great story got buried: Fred Couples and Tom Watson 1-2 on the leaderboard!
We can only the announcers will be able to keep a stright face should he get a hole in one.
I’m much more happy about finding that cool Eagle FAQ. The desert-y area a couple of miles out of town here actually has them (I drove by what I strongly suspect was a gold eagle feeding on a deer corpse once – it was huge, and matched a picture of a gold eagle I’d seen before).
… a seagull and a duck.
Why is this news? I mean after all, his ability to get it in the hole has never been questioned.
Oh, wait…
Not only that, they mate in “free-fall”…. If they don’t get done soon enough they go “splat”… Talk about “coitus-interruptus”!