The crowd of revelers at the national Cinco de Mayo celebration salutes the American press for their moment-by-moment media reporting on the massively deadly swine flu pandemic.

* The "Open Borders" protest turnout was a bit less than Harry Reid had hoped.

* Rumor had it that the holiday commemorated the sinking of a boatload of Hellman's.

* Cinco de Mayo = victory of Mexicans over French in 1862. Big deal, everyone's defeated the French!

* Album Cover: Phil Music and his Tijuana Pit Band, featuring Monty Zuma.

Say tarbender .....

Obama's latest attempt at diplomacy with Iran (pictured), was met with: We'll get back to you.

Now that the Yankees lowered seat prices, it only amounted to a few more filled seats.

With criticism from the right growing stronger, and even a tiny crack appearing in MSM uniformity (gasp). President Obama finds that hailing a spaceship, and hitching a ride back home, somewhat harder than he first thought.

"Throw 'im the old bean ball!"

Rumor had it that the holiday commemorated the sinking of a boatload of Hellman's.

I thought it was a new clinic with five physicians

Job seekers have already started gathering after the official announcement that "Qatar and Cuba ... launched a joint $75 million project to create a five-star resort on the Caribbean island" which should be completed in 2015.

Just by observing the Cinco de Martins, it's a given they've had at least Cinco de Mayos, cinco de Mojitos, and cinco cervezias fria.

...and two loaves of bread.

JD's Mom - "There's my son. As a teen, he experienced unrequited, all-consuming love at first sight. After that, well, he became weird with many likeminded friends."

Democrats post another photo of illegal immigrants doing a job that Americans won't debase themselves to do, root for the Marlins.

ashton kutcher (aplusk) (in black) - "heyyyyy twits ... at the game ... really f'ed up ...

The rest of the Marlins fans were sold to other teams at the end of last season.

Is it just me or are these Obama rallies waning?

'Get me more white people, we need more white people.'

It would appear that the 5 brothers from the Mayo family are in the stands today.

The New York times reported record crowds came out to support Obama with the reporter on the scene saying the crowd was so large he wouldn't even want to begin to estimate its exact size.

The swine flu has spread from Mexico and hit the US sports scene hard, killing 495 out of 500 fans at a recent Marlin game.

The Obama economic recovery team felt things were going so well that they took the afternoon off to take in a ball game.

Obama's easing of the Cuban embargo didn't increase the fan base as much as MLB had predicted.

Trying to increase ratings, MSNBC tries to copy the NBC morning show format, including the outdoor segment.

Mexicans, fearing deportation, want to be perceived as lighter-skinned Anglos, so they sit in the "bleachers".

Mexicans protest US interference by claiming "squatters rights" in the cheap seats.

How many runs? They've all got the runs, that's why the seats are all empty!

Cinco de Morons

Soy un perdedor, we're all losers baby...

And all the girlies say I'm pretty fly for a white guy.

Damn, now there are baseball games that Americans won't do.

Vote for Pedro.

A vote for me .... is a vote for change.

What happens at Ray's Hell Burger, stays at Ray's.

The newly reconstituted Obama Supreme Court, gets underway.

Although Attorney General Holder testified before Congress that Gitmo fanatics would not be released in the US, some people suspect that it has already happened.

Obie accepts his People's Choice Award, for Best New Dictator.

Colonel Mustard, in the West Wing, with a teleprompter.

When the stadium blasted "ICE, ICE, baby" over the P.A. system, the stands cleared out.

Though dropped from the FBI's ten most wanted list, decades ago. Director Meuller said he was encouraged none the less, by recent sightings of the Frito Bandito.