Time for the Thursday OTB Caption ContestTM
Thursday, November 1, 2012
Winners will be announced Monday PM
BHO: Ashton, I can make this woman to my right assume an absurd position using only my voice.
Kutcher: Far out, Barack. I will gladly serve you another four years.
Mr President!! I like Angry Birds!! Here, look at my tee shirt! My favorite is the yellow turbo bird…
“That is correct sir, the healthcare law means your wife cannot be declined coverage due to her Pre existing condition”
It wasn’t long before Mary needed both hands to keep smiling.
Obama: “OK, She’s stretching her face back, but I can’t tell what she’s being for halloween… A zombie?”
Man: “Close, but no… Nancy Pelosi.”
“No, you can not have a french fry.”
OMG!!! (repeat as necessary)
I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille.
A stark illustration of current identity politics: the white man definitely isn’t as swayed as the white woman.
“What is she doing, Mr. President?” “Like most of my supporters, she’s trying to cover her ears when the subject of Benghazi comes up.”
Having drunk the kool-aid, Kari felt her reason and accountability drain from her as she was assimilated.
“Oh no! I left Kevin home alone!”
Simon says, “Touch your cheeks”. No sir, your butt cheeks don’t count.
“Obama sure will be surprised by my John Belushi imitation of a zit!”
Mr. President, when I put my hands like this do I look like a fish?
I was going to do the home alone thing, but stormy beat me to it.
And the forceps had by like this but I fought back and survived my mom’s abortion.
The campaign cheered the results following the field trial of the “Cindy 6000″ human teleprompter”
Obama: “Yep… she has the worst case of binderface I’ve ever seen.”
Oh my God! You’ll save Little Bird, too ?!
Wow!! Even when he just says “uh” I can feel the oceans recede and the planet heal!
I get to sit next to Whoopie on the View…….really!!!
If I vote for you I get to sit next to Whoopie on the view……really ?!?!
“I can haz cheeseburger?!?!?!?!”
“She said my fly is open.”
“I don’t care, Obama is awesome.”
Stefon, what are you doing in Ohio?
“Please excuse my wife, Mr. President. She suffers from SOS (Spontaneous Orgasm Syndrome).”
It took the sildenafil (female Viagra) a few hours to kick in. But once it did, Ann was well on her way…to the town hall meeting with the president that is.
Now don’t get your panties all up in a twist, but here it comes, ready? If elected for a second term, not only will I guarantee government mandated healthcare disguised as Universal Healthcare, but I will provide every American the opportunity – and by opportunity, I mean force — to buy shares of a bridge I happen to have for sale in Brooklyn.
It took the sildenafil a few hours to kick in. But once it did, Ann was well on her way…to the town hall meeting with the president that is.
Finally getting the reaction he was looking for all along by referring to the economy just once, President Obama abandoned trying to set a personal best in mentioning women’s reproductive rights the most times in a single campaign speech.
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