Thursday, March 13, 2008
Time for the Thursday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners will be announced Monday PM
Charles “good day old chap. You wouldn’t by chance have blunt, jibber or just a couple ounces of loose Marley would you?”
Charles “DUDE, Camilla and I were like SOOOOO baked last night”
You right, mon. She does have a nice caboose.
Mum is not going to be happy getting beat at musical chairs again. Now if I could just knock her off the throne that easily.
Charles “Bro, pardon Camilla. Hemp gives her terrible gas”
Why am I holding my right trouser leg? I don’t know … why do you ask?
The Emperor’s Club you say …. bunch of hotties, thanks for the tip.
Charles: “$5500.00 per hour… she’s all yours.”
Charles: “Bang the drum slowly; the white witch wants to dance.”
No … that’s her version of the Musical Youth song. She changed it from Pass the Dutchie to …..
Charles: “$5500. per hour……look, please, just take her off my hands for a little while. OK, OK, I’ll pay you $6000.”
(Sorry, Dill, I did a rip-off twist.)
That’s nothing, old chap. You should smell her after she’s had steak and kidney pie. And the breeze will knock your hat off!
Oh, don’t worry. With that stick up her @$$ that’s as far down as she can sit.
Charles “Good lord my good man, you may be black enough to run for President”
(Snicker) Watch this (Hee Hee) I put a whoopee cushion on her seat.
(Sorry, Dill, I did a rip-off twist.)
Embellishments are encouraged
“Three goats and a chicken, you say? Make it four goats, my good man, and you’ve got yourself a swap!”
“Please, take my wife!”
Charles: “Hey old chap, can you make the next number a Fertility Dance”?
“Camilla wants to do the boogaloo!”
“OOOhweee! She sure ripped one out that time, eh?”
“She has to do things two steps after me. Except behind closed doors. Then she brings out the whip and blimey, we’re off to the races.”
Oh that’s nothing … you should hear her burp!
I must say, the brownies we had with tea were simply brilliant.
You know, when I am king droit seigneur says I can sleep with any virgin in the land on her wedding night. I must say I’m looking forward to that if you catch my drift.
In “Switch II” the hilarity ensues when the heir to the English throne finds himself switched with a Jamaican drummer.
I say old chap, do you know any Bach?
Just say NO to drugs.
This is your future king. This is your future king on drugs. Any questions?
By Jove, you have a tremendous tan don’t you. I just turn red like an Irish night watchman at a distillery.
I heard the female dancers here are something to see. Who’s next? Oh dear, amateur night you say.
So your “posse” could take out that Drudge chap for us? We’d be very grateful.
Ugly aint she….
Charles: “It’s a good thing that Jamaica isn’t susceptible to tsunamis cause the last time she danced was during our visit to Banda Aceh.”
Do you know Beethoven’s Fifth Symphony old chap?
That last piece you played was a bit raunchy eh?wink, wink, nod, nod.
I’m sorry the blond is not for sale.
Charles: “Welcome to the no spin zone!”
“What do you mean it’s nice to see I got back on the horse?”
Charles: “She’s wearing white – so she must be a virgin! So when do we sacrifice her to the volcano’s gods?”
Play that funky music, white boy.
“Jamaica? No, no, D’yer Maker?”
Remember that little job you did for me up in France? Yes, well, as you can see, I fear I’m in need of your services yet again.
“Well, that’s not exactly what I meant when I said I was next in line.”
Camilla parks her bowels.
“Now that you mention it, I do like a little touch of hairy in the night.”
(Sorry, I meant to say…)
“I’m from funky Kingston-upon-Thames.”
Charles’ habit of introducing himself as the Prince of Wailers only brought blank stares from the locals.
“Bond. James Bond.”
Rock. Paper. Scissors.
“Bongo now, bong-o later.”
“I’ve heard that ‘it takes a village.’ Fortunately, that’s not a problem as I own about eight-hundred of them.”
“Did you go to Eton?”
“I keep a couple of spliffs in my sock garter. See?”
“Spitzer? I don’t even know her.”
(Yeah, I know its not original.)
“Rum, sodomy and the lash. What was the question again?”
“I’m client number 007. Please don’t tell anyone.”
“So, tugging on my trousers like this makes me a bad boy yardie?”
“Camilla, I’d like you to meet Sensemilla.”
“Is that you, Maubee?”
I’ve tried to get her have someone pull her finger first. But she’s never really been much of a joke teller.
Do you know Bang a Gong by T-Rex?
Whisper – “I dare you to tell her, ‘Simon says do the Yugoslavian Gypsy Dance.'”
“My boy, Harry, used her for target practice before going to Iraq. See that grey-black discoloration near her right ear?”
Remember the time we absconded with the Headmaster’s yappy little terrier, and then sold him to that Korean barbeque in SoHo? ….. Oh wait, that wasn’t you.
Charles “Why yes, I heard the pathetic shuffling the Obama’s did in relation the their spiritual advisor. They are so full of fecal matter I think I got some on me trouser cuffs.”
* Adding Camilla after a serving of Jerk Chicken gave the band a unique sound…. and aroma.
* Whew, man.. that ain’t Ganga smoke…
Why da long face, Camilla?
“Don’t be silly, old chap, it was Diana that was the whore.”
-OT You know, I see those darn plastic chairs everywhere in the world. I need to buy stock in that company.
Sorry, old Chap. She likes that beat, everytime she ‘ears it she does a “Weekend at Bernie’s” sort of thing.
No, mon, I don’t know what a hooker would consider unsafe, but my cousin Max Beauvoir has a way to find out, and, for the price of another chicken, he can have your wife do it.
I’m Cambridge class of ’70, also. How come I haven’t seen you at any of the reunions?
Yeah …. I know, in fact that’s the real reason Harry went to Afghanistan in the first place.
That sounds kinda familiar, oh I know …. Baby Got Back, Sir Mix-A-Lot!
The Yanks looked everywhere in Iraq …. but we got our own WMD right here.
Why enter anything after the first one. That’s GOLD!
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