Caption Contest

Time for another OTB Caption ContestTM.

Write your caption in the comments below.
The New York Times

Winners will be announced Monday.

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James Joyner
About James Joyner
James Joyner is Professor and Department Head of Security Studies at Marine Corps University's Command and Staff College. He's a former Army officer and Desert Storm veteran. Views expressed here are his own. Follow James on Twitter @DrJJoyner.


  1. mark says:

    “Aw, crap! If someone would have told Bob Dole it was Christmas, Bob Dole would have worn a Christmas tie! Why doesn’t anyone tell Bob Dole these things, dammit?”

  2. { Finally! My opportunity to drink the Republican kool-aid. }

  3. Hermoine says:

    “Yo Newt, that’s enough to keep both of us very busy for a long time. Check with Bob to see if he has any Viagra on him.”

  4. Rachel Edith says:

    Next – “All I can say is ‘Jingle Bells!'”
    Bill – “Woooooo, you right about that, boy.”

  5. Elvis says:

    “Her name is Monica. It’s like I told you. You don’t always have to marry ’em, silly.”

  6. No man, I’ve already had her. Trust me, stick with Mary Ann.

  7. Rob A. says:

    Clinton: [Whispered] Ok, Ok, I’ll get you a cup of tea, Monica.

    [Full voice] Hey Newt, look over there, Reno “dropped” her pen again!

  8. Rodney Dill says:

    Hillary!! Put down that chainsaw!”

  9. cz says:

    Clinton: “Yoink!”

  10. Rodney Dill says:

    Bob: “Psst, Here Bill slip one of Bob Dole’s little blue friends into Newtie’s cup while he’s not looking. You thought he was a stiff speaker before? Wait’ll you see this.”

  11. Oliver says:

    Bill Clinton: Always between two boobs.

  12. Dick says:

    Loudly: Hey!! Lookythere willya!
    Sotto voce: OK, Monica, under the table, quick!


    Hey Monica, Dole’s got a Viagra pup tent – help him out willya so we can all get up and leave this meeting.

  13. Keith Taylor says:

    “Hillary, get your coat. That bitch came in the same outfit as me.”

  14. McGehee says:

    Later Clinton would tell reporters, “I did not have sexual relations with that Speaker.”

  15. Rodney Dill says:

    Fortunately, Bill had the wherewithal to surreptitiously slide the cup, with lipstick marks around the rim, over in front of Newt just as Hillary walked into the room.

  16. Matt says:

    I don’t know about you Bill, but in Congress we like to hold their heads like this.

  17. BA says:

    “See, I told you she could fit that cigar up there.”

  18. Rodney Dill says:

    Janet Reno always pulled the same gag on Bob Dole everytime they played Simon-says.
    “OK, Simon say’s, with your right hand grab the cup or glass of the person to your right.
    Oh, Sorry Bob. You’re out again.”

  19. Hodink says:

    Newt – “We’re all human and we all goof. Do things that may be wrong, but do something.”
    Bill – “I hear that!”
    Bob – “Clinton, you low-life sleazebag.”

  20. Rodney Dill says:

    Newt: “Hey! Is Buddy doing what I think he’s doing to Socks? Maybe we should stop him.”
    Bill: “Naw, Its alright, better just to let him finish.”
    Bob: “Finish? Jeez, I wish I could just even get started.”

  21. Todd says:

    As the cockroach climbed across Lincoln’s portrait the President and the Speaker debated who was best positioned to kill it, while Senator Dole reminisced about the good old days when he too could squash a bug.

  22. Rachel Edith says:

    “Ok, Newtie Patootie. 2004 has Dean, a Northern boy, capture the imagination of the Democratic Party but Kerry will carry. So, wanna know my prediction for 2008?”

  23. Hermoine says:

    “Hey, Newt. Bob has that ughhh look. Did you sneak some Ex-Lax to him again?”