Thursday, April 23, 2009
Time for the Thursday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners will be announced Monday PM
Futuristic Elmo visits the Hockey Hall of Fame to view Lord Stanley’s Cup…in the future.
ELMO: I am tickled that I was asked to be your spokesperson to introduce you to our new planeterium exhibit.
Waterboard Me Elmo visits the EIT Hall of Fame to try out the new Binford 2100 Vertical Waterboarding Aparatii which uses pure oxygen instead of water while playing the soothing sounds of Yanni. Asked of his experience Elmo quipped “you Zionists will never break me!!”.
Sesame Street unveils their new delivery system. It is reported that it is now able to reach Mr. Roger’s Neighborhood.
Telephone Sanitizers, check.
Annoying children’s show puppets, check.
The B ship is ready to launch.
Greetings Earthlings. We have taken this form in order to make the transition to your enslavement and eventual consumption less frightening for your young.
Scared shitless Elmo?
“Houston, we have a problem. We appear to have lost one testicle.”
What, me worry?
The weaponization of space has begun.
Kiss me arse goodbye? Well Mr.President, who tinkled on your corn flakes?
Sure … be happy to say hello to Tim Leary for ya.
Copy of the Constitution … check.
Obama’s Guide to Dhimmitude for Dummies …. check.
Thick sliced, hickory smoked bacon … check.
Being one of the last neocon bloggers in cyberspace (who refuses to turn out the lights).
A lil sumtin to calm my nerves? Sure …. Thanks. Leave the bottle.
Phase 2 of Hulu’s evil plan to destroy the world begins on schedule.
“Uh, please take me to your Leader.”
“No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die.”
The new trillion dollar Obama administrations answer to late term abortions, it not only aborts, but gets rid of the nasty little baby corpses before they can pollute mother earth.
I always thought it was Little Green Men.
“Just what do you think you’re doing, Dave?“
“Elmo! Stop! It’s a cookbook!”
Well I dreamed I saw the silver spaceships flying in the yellow haze of the sun.
There were children crying, and colors flying all around the chosen one.
All in a dream, all in a dream the loading had begun.
They were flying Mother Nature’s silver seed to a new home in the sun.
“I’ve seen things you people wouldn’t believe. Attack ships on fire off the shoulder of Orion. I watched C-beams glitter in the dark near the Tannhauser gate.”
* Tickle Patrol, space division
* “Ickle Me, Tickle Me, Pickle Me too” – (Shel Silverstein)
* Elmo’s World… The Expanded Edition
* I am Elmo of Borg. Tickling is irelevant!
* At least I got rid of that damn frog and pig…
* Do you like my new space ship? Kermit made it. Uh huh! He riveted alllll over it!
* I got a glass garbage can for Oscar. Now, maybe we’ll see what he DOES in there.
* Commander Worf was never the same after that transporter accident.
* Security cameras caught what is one of the more unique Bank Robbery attempts this year….
Ready to launch in three… Three! Three! Three! Three! How many is three? The world of three…
To begin his press conference upon his return from space, Elmo announces: “Mars ain’t the kind of place to raise your kids…”
“To nine and beyond!”
“To infinity nine and beyond!”
That’s not exactly what NASA meant when they said they were going to do more unmanned missions.
“Dorothy, I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore.”
Elmo completes his total takeover of Sesame Street as “Commander Elmo” replaces “Pigs in Space.”
Last train to Clarksville (circa 2084).
Earth Day smearth day …. (I am like so outta here).
Star Trek XI …. boldly going where no man-puppet has gone before.
Blastoff …. Who said that?!!!
“Hi. I’m Elmo.”
“Yes, remember the Alamo.”
“No, remember Elmo.”
“No, Tickle Me Elmo.”
“Elbo? Funny bone?”
“Can I press one for Sane English?”
Elmo joins the cast of “Pigs in Space”
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