Democrats Have Magic Powers

According to DNC Chairman Howard Dean, that is:

If you think what’s going on in the Middle East today would be going on if the Democrats were in control, it wouldn’t, because we would have worked day after day after day to make sure we didn’t get where we are today. We would have had the moral authority that Bill Clinton had when he brought together the Northern Irish and the IRA, when he brought together the Israelis and the Palestinians.

Later, Dean also noted that if Democrats were in power, the threat from terrorism would be over, gas would cost 7 cents a gallon, and he–personally–would have cured cancer. But, alas, they’re all lost opportunities now.

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Greg Tinti
About Greg Tinti
Greg started the blog The Political Pit Bull in August 2005. He was OTB's Breaking News Editor from June through August 2006 before deciding to return to his own blog. His blogging career eventually ended altogether. He has a B.A. in Anthropology from The George Washington University,

Comments

  1. The tragedy isn’t that the fools leading the Democrats keep digging, but in knowing that the Republicans only have to stay about two notches above them to stay in charge.

  2. Mark says:

    Don’t forget John Edwards claim during the 2004 campaign that if we elected John Kerry then Christopher Reeve would walk again.

  3. Bithead says:

    Is there any doubt in your mind, however, that the very reason that they’re making those kind of claims is because there are several idiots out there that actually believe them?

  4. Christopher says:

    oooo Charles, way to dis the republicans. What wit!

    According to Dean, Bill Clinton brought together the Northern Irish and the IRA? LOL! They aren’t imbeciles that need the US. (of course liberals think that everyone “needs” their help). And Clinton brought together the Israelis and the Palestinians? Wow, I will look deep in the history books for that reference. I will be looking for a long time since it DOESN’T EXIST!

    Charles, for your information, the Israelis are taking a page from Bush’s book and fighting to DEFEAT the terrorists! FIGHTING! That’s the only language terrorists understand. If democrats had been in control since 9/11? They would have given the terrorists Hawaii and Alaska already in a failed attempt to appease them, and would by now be offering maybe Florida or Republican Texas.

    LOL! Dean and the liberals are a JOKE!

  5. Len says:

    If democrats had been in control since 9/11? They would have given the terrorists Hawaii and Alaska already in a failed attempt to appease them, and would by now be offering maybe Florida or Republican Texas.

    I admire your psychic abilities, Christopher. They really are quite amazing.

    Mine are better, though. If the Democrats had been in charge, the attacks of 9/11 would not have happened. They would have been smart enough to see the warning signs and actually do something about them. A Democratic president would not have gone on vacation for the entire month prior to the attacks after having been warned that they were likely to occur.

    There. How’s that? Told you my psychic abilities were better than yours.

  6. Bithead says:

    So how is it you prove yourself wrong before the echo died?

  7. Christopher says:

    Yea, Len. You’re psychotic alright.

  8. Len says:

    No, no, Christopher. You misunderstood. I said psychic. You know… Just like you and Greg. We are able to glare into the past and state without equivocation what would have happened if variables and situations had been different.

    I can do it just a bit better than you two. Do try not to be jealous.

    Didn’t mean to confuse you. Sorry about that.

  9. Matt says:

    Dean also forgot to mention that the Dem’s would issue Magic Hats to all members of the military, thus making them invulnerable to any sort of nastiness.

    Oh, and free Ring-Dings for everyone.

  10. Herb says:

    Howard Dean is another Yasser Arafat and we all know what Arafat represented.

  11. Rodney Dill says:

    Its laughable see ‘Moral Authority’ used in juxtaposition with ‘Bill Clinton’

  12. Pete_Bondurant says:

    It looks like the Jackass Party is taking Napolean Dynamite’s way of campaigning:

    “Just tell them that their wildest dreams will come true if they vote for you.”

  13. Christopher, your sarcasm is ill-informed if you know anything about me. Enjoy your snark.

  14. LJD says:

    Mine are better, though. If the Democrats had been in charge, the attacks of 9/11 would not have happened. They would have been smart enough to see the warning signs and actually do something about them. A Democratic president would not have gone on vacation for the entire month prior to the attacks after having been warned that they were likely to occur.

    I think you mean ‘hindsight’ abilities there, Len.
    No one but the hijackers knew the attack would happen on 9-11. Of course the Clinton administration did a great job of ignoring terrorist attacks on the U.S. until the voters booted their ‘all-knowing’ party out of the White House.

  15. Curse you Bush for denying us the benefits of a Gore administration 6 years ago. Who cares what shape our economy would have been in if only we had Gore to reduce global warming by 0.1 degrees.

  16. Devil's Advocate says:

    Wow, there’s some serious towel snapping rhetoric here.

    Here’s an idea, how about we try a little diplomacy for a change? Oh wait, we no longer have credibility in the international community and we’re in a race to third world economic status.

    Cool. Yep, Bush is doing a “heck of a job”.

  17. Bithead says:

    I don’t suppose it’s occurred to you, that the very diplomacy that you call for, is precisely how we ended up in the situation in the first place?

  18. Devil's Advocate says:

    Who exercised diplomacy? There has been no coherent diplomatic policy since 2000. Prior to 2000, sanctions against Iraq were working. Containment was successful. Proof: No WMD’s found. With a little patience on the part of QuicksDraw, we might have discovered that before mortgaging our grandkids’ future.

    Military solutions are band-aids. Suppose the US military “wins”. What does that look like? I think all arabs must be dead.

    Imagine some larger power invading US (aliens if you like). Will you surrender or will you form a resistance and fight to the death for your country? That’s what they are doing. Best thing we can do is leave.