Monday, January 23, 2017
Time For The Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners for this contest will be announced next weekend.
I offer this fist to all the women voters.
“Say it loud! I’m orange and I’m proud!”
Tiny hands make for tiny fists.
And dying in your beds many years from now, would you be willing to trade all the days from this day to that for one chance, just one chance to come back here and tell our enemies that they may take our lives, but they’ll never take our freedom!!!
“And now everybody: We will we will ROCK YOU”
“Orange is beautiful!”
“Blut und Boden!!”
“I am Trump! Hear me roar!”
“You WILL listen to me, damn it!”
Listen, I don’t punch down, people. Who said that? Look, I’m punching up right now!
Anyone who says I have small hands better watch out. This fist is YUUUUUGE!
The nation was horrified to see Donald Trump’s O face.
Donald Trump raises the tiny iron fist of authoritarianism over the United States.
“I hold her, in my five hands, the future of the United States.”
Power to the Pud!
“….and then I’ll grab the pussybull by the alternative facts and….”
“Guess what? I got a fever! And the only prescription.. is more cowbell!“
10%, wink-wink, nudge-nudge, say no more, say no more. NASA wanted a budget to send us to Mars and beyond. How about NASA pays us instead?
Well, he kept his campaign promise that if elected that he would argue about his inauguration crowd size. We should give him that much…
“With malice toward none, with charity for all, with firmness in the right as God gives us to see the right, let us strive on to finish the work we are in: to bind the mouths of the press, to care for him who can afford it, to do all which may achieve and cherish a just and lasting peace through nuking the crap out of any who oppose it.”
“I’m mad as hell, and not going to seek professional help for it!”.
@Aelio: He’ll get the Martians to pay for it.
The Alt right, Alt reality President
“The media is all liars! Everyone knows that 14 zillion persons attended my inauguration! More than everyone on Earth and Mars combined!”.
You’re Fired Up?
“I see that the short bus to crazytown is now picking up passengers….”.
“Napoleon hat? Where’s his Napoleon hat?”,
Open hand was so 1933
Arsenio lives !!!!
How’d I do it? Jill took scissors, Hillary took paper, and I took rocks !!
Witnesses said he just stood over her yelling “get up and fight, sucker!”
“I’m going outside and starting up the car. As a Jew, I’m afraid the Hitler salute is coming up next!…”.
As God is my witness, I knew turkeys could fly! Yugely fly! Like my flying fist of victory!
Proof that mankind is not as well evolved as was once thought…
Just discovered that he told the truth, so told a lie to cover it up…
If only Norman Rockwell had painted portraits of anger, madness and mental illness
“I hate to say it, but I found Barry Goldwater appealing, but Donald Trump appalling…”.
SPRINGTIME FOR HITLER?
Trump pantomimes what he likes to do to Putin.
“Ich bin ein … I mean … Rossiya zanimayet pervoye mesto”
“I’m mad as hell at the passing of Mary Tyler Moore!….But, thank God James Lipton is Ok!”.
Wanted to found a new magazine named MAD Magazine, but got angry when he found out that title was already taken, so went with ANGRY WHITE ASSHOLE as a title instead…
Paul Hooson: “Oh man, I feel another punchline coming, yeah, oh wow, it was just the chili I had for lunch…”.
Q: Where did a White House staffer hide a document that he didn’t want President Trump to see?
A: In a book, he’d never look there!
Q: Where will President Trump buy the parts to build “The Wall”?
A: At Wall-Mart!
Just when you think that race relations have improved in the U.S., something comes along…
Sample SAT Question
Place These Objects In Descending Order:
A. Lester Maddox B. Huey Long C. George Wallace D. Donald Trump
Harry Truman: The Buck Stops Here…
Donald Trump” The Buck Gets Passed Here…
“Someone call a priest!”.
“To hold the Bible?”.
“No, to perform an exorcism!”.
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OTB Caption Contest Winners
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Deval Patrick: I Got Drunk After The Boston Bomber Was Captured