Thursday, June 3, 2004
Time for another OTB Caption ContestTM:
Winners will be announced after noon Monday.
Not a caption: you didn’t find one of him chest-butting (or whatever you call it)?
[Dubya, thinking furiously…]
“Was it paper covers scissors?… Doh! that’s not it!”
“Those $%!@ white gloves are blinding me. I’ve got it! Rock bashes scissors! Gotcha, ya young whippersnapper…”.
I don’t remember saluting this way in the National Guard.
“So what’s a shizzle again?”
“You’re sure it won’t rub off?”
“Dang it, I’m real good at that funky three-way handshake from back in the ’70s, and I’ve almost got the hang of that high-five thing. Why do they have to keep changin’ this stuff?”
One potato, two potato, three potato, four….
When you can snatch this pebble from my hand, you will be promoted to Chief Petty Officer.
One potato, two potato, three potato, four!
Sorry Mary, I got so excited I forgot to read before posting 🙂
Ok, so I have the Senator by the neck…yeah, like that! And I say to him…
(I like Mary’s better though 🙂
“Wonder Twin powers, Activate!”
“So you’ve done the belly-button thing too?”
(only works if you have a Jack in the Box in your area)
Dubya involved in Bush-fisting scandal.
“Pardon me Mr. President, but I believe that was a whiff.”
Mr. President, You Da Man !!!
“Hey buddy: don’t get me wrong – I appreciate the campaign advice. But ya know I’m not big on pretending to be who I’m not. Let’s let that whole MTV, hip-hop gesture thing to John Kerry.”
Doh! Eric Akawie took mine …
“Remember my face, Quincy. I plan to be a two-term president.”
President Bush is seen awarding the Purple Heart to Lance Corporal Kiksyur Azzis, who lost his fingers while defending an Iraqi child from an insurgent mob. President Bush returned the Lance Corparals fingerless handshake in an attempt to show the same respect to his Purple Heart that he did to John Kerry’s three, by falling off his bike and getting a few scratches.
A new officer joined the ranks of our navy yesterday. The President congratulated the ensign on his hard work leading to this achievement.
“You got rock? I got rock. Do-over!”
What UP, G-Dubya, YO!
“You’re a tiny little president, aren’t you now?”
“Yo Dawg, I know Slim Shady and you’re no Slim Shady.”
“Yeah, you also say a rap thing with it, Sir. But, uhhhhhhh, let’s just concentrate on this for now.”
“Represent! Mr. President”
” … and then you grab your crotch.”
“I still don’t see why we have to go through this every time just so you’ll give me the football–“
Well saaaallluuuute ta you too big guy!!
…this is the fun part, you slowwllly squeeze the trigger on the joystick and release the muni…munish…the bomb.
“You know what they say, Mr. President. Big fist, big member. It’s ok, Sir. You have a fine fist.”
“Don’t look so worried Mr. President. We got Clinton with that disappearing saber trick too.”
“Okay, I’ll play thumb-war, but you’ll have to get rid of the silly
What is that, a cummerbund?”
5 potato…6 potatoe…7 potatoe MORE… “you’re it!” I.e. an Afro-American Citadel cadet, carefully chosen and sent by moi to fight the Iraq war…. until the bitter end!
Hey bro non-na dat fancy jive tauk when adressin’ a cadet. I iz hea on a free schola-ship courtesy of Uncle Sambo…get yo honkypaws off me Bushwacka cracka!
“Hey bro no-na…” is from ME…sorry I neglected to fill in the info. Ten lashes with a wet noodle..sir… yes sir!
Say…Are we blood brothers now?
Give me five, bro!
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