Monday, July 20, 2015
Time the Monday OTB Caption ContestTM
Winners for this contest will be announced next weekend.
After last quarter’s fundraising, the Rand Paul campaign had to cut back on payroll.
We need only 7 more to have a Minion minyan.
Yes, we are not bananas!
OOooo. Trump-ANA. TRUMP-ANA!!
I can’t believe they cancelled our gig, claiming Trump is funnier.
The KKK’s new garb just doesn’t have the same effect as the old robes and hoods.
Hitchhikers trying to get on the GOP Presidential bus tour.
Are white people really this into Minions or is this a giant joke?
“Over there! A man whose head is being devoured by a ferret!”
“That’s Trump, Fred.”
Emil looked on as his erstwhile companion gestured towards the Bernie Sanders rally. And while his associate seemed to come alight at the prospect of participating in the political process, Emil knew it was all in vain.
As Donald Trump will be glad to tell you, even his suppositories are the biggest and the best.
Dammit, Stuart…there are almost as many Republicans running for President as there are Minions. Lucky for us, Minions are smarter.
Hey! We’re not a paramecium, there’s three of us.
Minions, compelled as they are to serve the greatest villains, begin campaigning for Trump.
Yesterday, July 19, would have been Stuart Scott’s fiftieth birthday. Boo ya, Stuart.
Frank Luntz’s polling crew gets to work.
All the people at a Trump rally, about five weeks from now.
Secretary Kerry and his team celebrate the completion of the Iran deal.
Look over there – a tailor shop specializing in overalls!
‘Oh, no! The clown car left without us!’
Hillary’s minions: “Boo Ya ooo koo kachoo”.
Cliif Clavin looking for the Hillary’s Minions Support Group. (hint: Cliffie–its over in the roped off section)
“And now for an exclusive look at the meltdown at Gawker, we turn to the Minions.”
That big Donald Trump rally…
Fans of Paul Hooson’s jokes are rather scarce…
Strangely, I thought that Jim Cramer had more fans than this….Boo Ya!
And the surprise winner of the GOP Iowa caucus – with 3 votes, twice as many as his nearest competitor — was Congressman Franklin BooYa who immediately withdrew his name from consideration.
Rush Limbaugh, having several years ago overcome the prescription drug problem that haunted him for many years, had the weirdest dream where the pills actually came to life. They seemed to be as confused as he was.
“Hey. You’re getting taller.”
“I took a Viagra.”
(Jees my own comment stuck in moderation, probably the ‘V’ word)
The last three people willing to invite Dylann Roof to their church on Sunday…
@Moosebreath: Hakol B’seder
The last three people willing to invite James Holmes out for a nice relaxing night at the theater…
Why did the minion cross the road?
To get to the punch line.
“Pardon me boys, but has anyone seen that Chattanooga shoo shoo shooter?”, said the fellow with the speech impediment…
@rodney dill: Wow, in that case I won’t tell any jokes where the punchline is Virginia….or, vagina….
Some people are just plain hard for the police to racially profile…
The worst ever henchmen for a James Bond villain ever….Time to go back to the Koreans…
@Paul Hooson: I don’t know. I think putting a derby hat on one and naming him Odd Knob might make a good Bond villian.
“Greetings Earthlings, we’re here to meet your leader, Michele Bachmann.”
Surprisingly, they are all girls. And they aren’t proud of it, but they did a porno to pay for college entitled, “THE TERROR OF TINY TITS”…
One of them has the nickname, “One Eyed-Monster”…
Hillary’s campaign staph
Moments later, they were hit by a car, and the street ran white with creamy filling.
Not to sound prejudiced, but they sure look like a couple of Twinkies to me…
Rejected Advertising slogan #109.457: THE MINIONS….Just like James Holmes, coming to a theater near you….
As it turns out, these three Minions actually went to that Aurora movie theater with James Holmes,but he disappeared to the candy counter during intermission. Later, when they visited him in jail, he asked them, “How was the second act?”…
These Minions were questioned about that breaking news Louisiana movie theater shooting, and one had this comment, “I knew James Holmes. James Holmes was a friend of mine. Sir, you’re no James Holmes”…
When questioned about the Louisiana shooting, one of the Minions commented, “Who knew that James Holmes sold franchises?”….
One Minion comments, “James Holmes? You’re no John Holmes…”
A Minion comments, “James Holmes is so outraged at that Louisiana theater shooting guy stealing his shtick that he may file a copyright infringement lawsuit…”
Make a one-time donation
‘World’s Greatest Dad’ Arrested in Internet Sex Sting
All Your Labor Are Belong to Us
Two Dead, Three Injured In Shooting At Seattle Area High School
Appeals Court Rules N.S.A. Data Mining Illegal
It’s Not Debtor’s Prison, It’s Contempt Of Court