Steven L. Taylor is a Professor of Political Science and a College of Arts and Sciences Dean. His main areas of expertise include parties, elections, and the institutional design of democracies. His most recent book is the co-authored A Different Democracy: American Government in a 31-Country Perspective. He earned his Ph.D. from the University of Texas and his BA from the University of California, Irvine. He has been blogging since 2003 (originally at the now defunct Poliblog).
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I hope that the joy and beauty of the season will be with all of you throughout the coming year. Whatever you’re celebrating, may peace be with you and yours. From Casa Luddite, Merry Christmas!
I will have to make or receive about 5 or 6 calls today. Three of them will be no problem and I could chat for hours. But I know they have family to get back to, so I’ll cut it short.
I will have at least two obligatory ones where I run out of shit to talk about four minutes in. Thankfully, this year, we can swap very recent weather anecdotes.
I hate awkwardness. I am calling you or you are calling me out of perceived obligation. I don’t really know you, and you don’t know me and we never think about each other at all ever, but we are compelled to pretend to care.
Everyone I actually care about got their present two weeks ago (mail early). You got a card.
When you are going into an awkward / uncomfortable fake bonhomie everything is copacetic phone conversation always have an out planned beforehand. Always!
5 to 8 minutes and bail. Ask about family. Talk about weather. Bail. There is no upside.
Kari Lake got her dumb ass lawsuit bumrushed out the door late yesterday. She asked to be declared the winner and had no evidence.
One of her begs was that excessive wait times chased away R voters. Dude! I grew up with if you went to vote after work it was guaranteed two hour line. I coped. It was expected.
Does waiting in line only impact R voters? Urban voters are used to that shit and it is remarkable if it only takes a half hour.
They were hanging their speculation on very urban, very diverse Maricopa County. You know, a hot bed of suppressed Republucan voters. I’m curious why the court even entertained the suit without any merit.
@de stijl: It’s OK if DEM voters have to wait 3 hours in a freezing rain to vote because they are godless heathens who deserve to suffer. GOP voters however are the chosen people who if inconvenienced in any way possible it is an offense to God and the constitution.
Ian Jepson, who shot video footage of the Santa jam, said the lane was blocked for about two hours. He said the Santas were on their annual pub crawl. “They shot past me singing and we later found them stuck where the lane narrows. They were quite tightly jammed but it says no parking. It was quite funny as they tried to free themselves.”
……………………….
The tankful of Santas was also spotted earlier in the day in other towns along the west coast of Cornwall, including St Ives and Helston. Lisa Charrd, who filmed the group in St Ives, said: “There was a group of Santas in the tank and they were all very friendly and full of Christmas joy.”
I just realized that in one of my obligatory calls I can’t even bring up the weather because that guy will go off on how AGW and the whole concept of global warming is a plot and is not happening at all and will prompt a reactionary anti-Marxist screed. Happens two times out of three. He is very predictable.
Dollars to doughnuts that guy bought into QAnon in the last 12 months. He is that stupid. He is 100% the type to be that amenable to their pitch.
Fuck my life! Grr! I have a dodge planned out, it’s cool. My doorbell will ring mid “conversation” guaranteed. A friend is coming over soon. I will ring the doorbell myself. I will have planted that seed up front. Always have a plan!
Robespierre once argued passionately in front of the National Constituent Assembly for the abolition of the death penalty.
A few months later he voted for the execution of Louis XVI, after arguing the deposed king shouldn’t even receive a trial.
A few years after that he was the prime moving force behind the Terror, which saw thousands executed with minimal legal niceties, and often for spurious reasons. Many were his political enemies and rivals
It gets worse. Two of those executed political enemies, Danton and Desmoulins, were his friends.
The morning of September 11th, 2001 was an local election day in Minneapolis. Bright, sunny, gorgeous day. I was between gigs. I was up early. My polling place was about a mile away up on Lake St. In September so it had to have been a primary. I cannot recall exactly.
A mile? Yeah, I’ll walk it and not have to worry about parking. I showed up about 8:03 AM and I was first to vote there that day. No line that Tuesday very early morning. I got the first “I voted!” sticker of the day. I wore it proudly. The poll workers were very pleasant. Got a coffee to go at Brueger’s. I walked home. Easiest voting experience ever.
Stopped off at the corner store at Hennepin and Franklin to buy a ginger ale and everybody was looking at the TV in the corner and was kinda freaked out. Something weird was going on in NYC.
I got home and turned on the TV to watch CNN to see what the hell was going on.
@de stijl: I was doing a couple of side jobs for friends. I watched the towers come down and then I went to work. When I was finally finished that evening, it took damned near forever to find a gas station that still had gas.
I just felt like “Haysoos crispo! Fer cryin’ out loud, it’s not the end of the world!”
The kids (23 and 25) live in the Bay Area. Daughter #2 who works in a grocery store had to work Xmas Eve and morning. So we decide to fly up. Except that we just got a dog who’s had a tough life and was not ready for airports but is an excellent car dog. So, OK, we’ll do the drive, stopping for the night as always (because I’m that lazy) at the Allegretto, in Paso Robles.
The glitch: dog, plus suitcase plus tons of gifts do not fit in a Mercedes convertible. So, shit, fuck, we have to take the Volvo EV. Here’s the thing: the charging structure for EVs is absolutely not there yet. We did the same drive a year ago and it was bad, but this time we planned more meticulously. Which would have worked except that:
1) 80% of available charging stations are basically an extension cord out the window of someone’s garden apartment. I exaggerate, but not by much.
2) Of actual available chargers, only 10% are reasonably fast, the 350 watts.
3) Of 350 watt chargers, 80% are broken. As are 70% of 150 watt. What is actually available? 50 watt. Which is to say, 36 watt in reality. Hours and hours of waiting to get another 200 miles.
Conclusion: we dumped the Volvo in Paso Robles after a desperate morning searching for juice. Rented a massive, gas-guzzling Toyota 4Runner, and drove to the Bay.
Things I hate about Christmas: The music, the way things close down, the utter waste of time and money that is gifting. The way materialism crushes the poor and working class. Trying to remember what we tipped the pool guy last year. The Santa lie we tell to children, setting them up for a lifetime of distrusting their lying parents. Everything about the tree – the buying, the schlepping, the decorating, the disposing – everything except the actual finished tree, which has the aforementioned lights.
I realize people would not be able to go cold turkey, but I have long hoped that we could begin to transition away from Christmas. A first step: reform the gifting process. Everyone in the usual gifting group writes a hundred dollar check to everyone else. On Christmas morning, having enjoyed the experience of opening envelopes to find $100, we all ceremoniously tear up the checks. Then we order Chinese food.
@Michael Reynolds: The wife and I largely eschew gifts for one another on the reasonable grounds that we pretty much just buy what we want all year. Gifts for the kids still make sense, given their extremely limited income. But her side of the family has this annoying tradition where her parents, her sister, SO, their kids, an aunt and uncle and sometimes their kids assemble, along with the seven of us somewhere (lately, here) for a near-Christmas meal and gift exchange. Except that the gifts are almost always complete crap that nobody wants but, not only cost money, but also stress and time trying to guess what some reasonably affluent adult they don’t actually know all that well might possibly want. I’m trying to get them to abandon that practice on the account of it being stupid.
@OzarkHillbilly: In Lake’s case, it’s AZ. It is trivially easy to be on the list where they mail you a ballot every election and you can sit in a lovely warm dry kitchen — say, with cookies baking in the oven just for ambiance — while you fill out your ballot. Note that this system was installed by Republican-controlled state government, before the crazies took over the party.
ETA: When I gave blood earlier this month, the new t-shirt says, “Will exchange blood for cookies.”
@Michael Cain: The Republicans liked vote-by-mail prior to 2020. In fact, the one case of which I’m aware of large-scale fraud through mail ballots was the 2018 House race in North Carolina (which led to a do-over). But somehow they never bring that one up.
I bought and put up lights one year. Holy crap, was that a mistake.
I’d never owned a house before. It seemed like a good and neighborly thing to do. I was wrong. I hated putting them up. I actually plugged them in for a grand total of maybe twenty hours. I hated taking them down. The entire process annoyed me greatly. Why would anyone do this on purpose? Every year?
Not my speed. No offense. I am not a Christmas light decorative homeowner.
Next winter, or the winter after, I saw a neighbor on a ladder putting up his lights. (I smoked at the time. You see a lot if you are out on your porch 7 minutes of every hour at odd times night and day. Interesting stuff is happening all around you and often and you never see it because you are not outside.)
I fetched my four strings of lights out of the basement, walked up and called out “Hey! I have some Christmas lights I no longer need. They are yours if you want them.” He gladly accepted. More power to him! Win – Win!
I wanted them out of my possession to prevent sunk-cost pressure to try it again. I am literally that stupidly bull-headed.
I like buying gifts for people I know well, because I can get them stuff that they will 1) appreciate and 2) possibly not get for themselves.
A memorable one was for a friend who loved combat aircraft, and in particular the Panavia Tornado (a fighter built jointly by several European countries in the 80s). I got him a very tall, very wide, very thin, hardcover book printed on glossy paper with tons of illustrations, photos, and diagrams, telling the history, development, specs, and deployment history of the Tornado.
I also got similar books for myself on the A-10 Warthog, and the Space Shuttle.
Otherwise, I would endorse Michael’s addition to the Sheldon Cooper Gift-giving Principle:
“You think you are being generous, but the foundation of gift giving is reciprocity. You haven’t given me a gift. You’ve given me an obligation. .. I now have to go out and purchase for you a gift of commensurate value and representing the same perceived level of friendship as that represented by the gift you’ve given me. It’s no wonder suicide rates skyrocket this time of year.
..
The entire institution of gift giving make no sense. Let’s say that I go out, and I spend 50 dollars on you, it’s a laborious activity, because I have to imagine what you need, whereas you know what you need. Now I could simplify things, just give you the 50 dollars directly, and you could give me 50 dollars on my birthday, and so on, until one of us dies, leaving the other one old and 50 dollars richer.”
While I have also spent years trying to get my extended family to limit gift giving to kids, I have to admi that getting annoyed at giving gifts is the ultimate first world problem…
Where I’m staying for the holiday is quite nice, but the beds are the highest I’ve ever seen. I literally have to climb into mine. Getting up is largely a matter of sliding over the side and hoping you land on your feet.
We have no family within 500 miles and so the holidays are always celebrated with our friends, our “chosen family.” My wife and I don’t give each other presents, as James says we pretty much just buy what we want all year. We give the kids money, the gift that is always the right size and color.
We had our chosen family over for a great feast on the 23rd. The highlight of Christmas Eve was a nearly two hour video call with our daughter who lives too far away. Today we’re going out for Chinese.
My wife and I have the next week off. There will be much relaxing. Maybe we’ll make our way into DC and hit a couple museums.
@Kathy: Why is that a problem? We are like elephants, wolves, lions; we’re pack animals. Mutual reciprocity and obligation is fundamental to that. Yes, I am wealthy enough that I have no material needs, but I do need family and friends. I try to gauge my gifts to make sure that my good financial position doesn’t create an unwelcome imbalance. This requires some effort at times. The effort, the hassle, the nuisance is the point. Kathy, please accept my figurative gift of a book of nature illustrations by early European explorers. Michael, I have a bottle of the 18 year old Oban for you. I’m still working on the gifts for the rest of you.
Inject the grumpy directly into my veins. Lol, that was a nice present.
Today is pretty hard for me. I’m massively estranged from my birth family and I’m fairly well estranged from my in-laws. I miss my parents. But it’s not real. Their love was always conditional on whatever shifting vagueness floated into their brains on a moment to moment basis.
As for gifts, my dad frequently got my mom aggressively crappy gifts. There was one year he got her a Barbie fur coat and a bunch of matchbox cars. Or the year that he RENTED her a slide projector. Because of that I try and get my partner something nice and thoughtful. I failed at that this year for reasons. She understands, I just feel bad I had my head up my tuchus.
Anyway. Sorry for the bummer. Hope everyone is having a nice day.
@Sleeping Dog:
Looking around Casa Luddite, we surrendered, or at least retreated towards Paris from the road to Moscow.* No, seriously, this year, as every year for the past 11, I’ve gotten what I most wanted – another trip around the sun to spend with my family and friends. Sappy but true!
*No, actually, it was pretty quiet here. Usual breakfast with SWMBO and the kids; exchanged a few gifts with each other. Later, we’ve got a ham and cheesy scalloped taters in the oven. Half a dozen desserts, and whatever else we can find to stuff our faces with.
@James Joyner:
Yeah, SWMBO’s family was into that whole shebang for years. Stupid poem with blind packages (mandatory ceiling of $25 circa mid 90’s) being handed left, handed right, etc., etc. for an eternity. I apparently broke the idea the year that we found a very nice cast iron tree stand, enamel coated, gorgeous! It weighed about 30#, and I couldn’t keep a straight face watching everyone! Only part that sucked was we didn’t win it – we’d really wanted it to cat-proof the tree!
@Michael Reynolds:
I don’t remember lying to her about it after about age 5, but I’m sure we did. Cultural upbringing. But when she was old enough to ask about it, my response was, “if you’re following the example of St. Nicholas in gifting to others without expecting anything in return, congratulations, you’re being Santa Claus.” While she still likes getting gifts, she spends significant time picking out things to delight others.
I won the family fight by getting kicked out of my birth family (apparently my imitation of Christ and the Temple Moneylenders one Thanksgiving was too good). BTW, love the Squishmallow! Even cooler than the unicorn one I got the daughter!
@Michael Reynolds: Yup, that’s roughly the experience that the car mag guys have been having, and probably the only reason Tesla is still afloat: their stations actually work (and are mostly of the fast variety).
@Beth: From what I know, your “reasons” are pretty solid this year. But don’t f*** it up next year! (joking) I’m glad you and your partner are thoughtful about it. Gift giving/receiving is not my personal love language, but I put thought into it when I must.
Happy holidays everyone, whatever you’re doing or celebrating this time of year!
My kids are at their mom’s, but they celebrated with me yesterday and it was joyful. A couple friends are stopping by today, so I’m not doing Christmas alone, yay!
No need to apologize. I was estranged from my mother for decades. Unmedicated bipolarism (my strong assumption) = bad parenting. Being an adult with strong, clear boundaries is a good thing. Keep on your path if you know you are right. Screw those guys!
Find / make your own family. People you trust to have your back. People who know actually the real you. Hold those tight (but not too tight).
Be you. Be honestly you amongst your chosen family. Maybe hold back a bit on the stuff you choose not to share with your therapist. (Be open, but don’t be a moron.)
—–
The best weird gift story is not mine but a friend of mine. The BiL of my friend gave my friend’s sister a rototiller as a gift. She apparently loved it.
A rototiller? Not in a million years could I have been that creative. It only gets used twice a year, but both times saves her dozens of hours of hard labor. Dude was a genius!
As to your gift to your partner that did not work as well as you’d hoped. Hey, now you know better. You now have the perfect opportunity to give an unexpected gift out of the blue. Pick a random Thursday in January and do it. The thing, the gift, itself does not matter, like, at all. Give them their figurative rototiller. Or a blatant white elephant. The thing doesn’t really matter. Everybody needs socks. Socks are always a good option. Nobody “needs” fancy cool-ass napkin rings, but once you have them they can cross that off their list. I’ve got the whole napkin ring situation permanently sorted out thanks to a thoughtful gift. An 8oz. bag of Fun-yuns is a fine gift.
The internal combustion engine is a curse upon the face of mankind. Did you know we used to walk every where we needed to go? Then we rode horses and donkeys where we needed to go? Then we trained oxen to pull our carts/wagons where we needed to go?
And now we dare not be inconvenienced in any way shape or form on our journeys as we desire to be there there there right now now now. Never mind wait an extra day. (don’t even get me started on how long it took our forebears to cross this continent)
Jesus H f’n Christ, we actually think we have a right to be anywhere we want to be any time we want to be and fuck the world our children will have to live in.
@James Joyner: Gifts for the kids still make sense, given their extremely limited income… but also stress and time trying to guess what some reasonably affluent adult they don’t actually know all that well might possibly want.
I sense a disconnect here.
I’m trying to get them to abandon that practice on the account of it being stupid.
You can always do what I did James: Refuse to partake. Sure, some will have their feelings hurt, but most will be secretly grateful. The few who will still object? Will be told the sit down and STFU.
@Kathy: You haven’t given me a gift. You’ve given me an obligation. .. I now have to go out and purchase for you a gift of commensurate value and representing the same perceived level of friendship as that represented by the gift you’ve given me.
Oh, F that sht. I didn’t ask for it, I never wanted it. Here, get your money back.
Really? Must be nice to receive shit you never wanted and would never buy in a thousand years and pretend for the rest of the day like it is just the thing you’ve always wanted because you can see in their face how much thought they put into buying the “perfect” gift.
I got my Mom a Roomba for Christmas. Even if the damn thing doesn’t clean to her satisfaction, we have had HOURS of laughter today watching it do a mapping run. And it got stuck on one of her glue mousetraps, so they thought that was pretty hilarious when “Roomie” sent her a text saying he was stuck. I would imagine she’ll spend all night watching it bump into shit. 😛 😛
Lying parents
I remember when the big kid down the block told me that there was no Santa Claus. I might have been in the first grade. He was in 2nd or 3rd. I went home and asked mom and dad “Richie Gruenberg just told me that there is no Santa Claus.” They fessed up. I don’t remember being all that disappointed. I don’t think that I really believed one guy could get to every house in the world in one night even if he had a flying sleigh. Not possible.
The Easter Bunny was another matter. For several more years my folks kept up that ruse. Baskets of candy they said they found on the front porch. My dad even told me he saw the varmint at the neighbors front door. Don’t remember how long it took me to shake that tale.
I love the idea of just giving cash as a gift, but I would go one step further and put a caveat on it.
Unless you absolutely need this $100 for groceries or bills, this gift is for a thing that you seriously considered, but passed up on for whatever reason. Go buy that thing you almost bought that one time. You will enjoy it.
Everybody needs to spend excess cash on something they want, but cannot justify practically. We need to be stupidly frivolous on occasion. Being strictly practical is stifling.
I don’t care what is – a Warhammer 40k figurine you fancy, the super-deluxe Blu-Ray of Fast and Furious Tokyo Drift. Whatever, it doesn’t fucking matter.
Just buy it. Trust me. You can thank me later.
—–
Cash as a gift. One day out of the blue my buddy Art called me up and asked me to be his Best Man. When? Saturday. Okay.
The thing is that I had spent maybe 30 or 40 hours total with him over the span of 6 years. Of course he was marrying Angie, perhaps the cutest, most adorable person on the planet, maybe ever. She’s maybe 4’11” and Art is at least 6’2″. They are so cute together. Warms my heart thinking about them.
A super solid interesting guy who I enjoyed interacting with occassionally, a very focused cat. He was into fencing and bagpipes. Not the world’s most socially adept person by any standard, and my standards are pretty low. The bagpipes practice thing got him banished to the far northern reaches of the soccer practice field as far away from anyone as possible. 8AM to 9 PM only. Art created a new campus rule which I think is pretty fucking awesome.
One day he was at Friday Afternoon Club drinking beer with the crew and I asked him if he would be okay in giving me the basics of how to play the bagpipes one day. He said sure, how about tomorrow morning?
I dragged my sorry, hungover, aspirin gulping ass up to the far edge of the soccer field by 9AM. Art was so chipper I wanted to punch him.
He ran me through the basics. One thing I was totally unaware of is that the sound only comes from squeezing the bladder out through the various horns kind of like an old school organ. The straw thing you see bagpipers blowing into is only to refill the bladder for the next riff. It’s very aerobic, I got light headed. You have to puff pretty fucking hard.
The controls for the horns are wicked hard complicated. Fingerings is involved. I sucked.
After an hour I could “sqounk” a little bit as if I knew vaguely what I was doing. It was delightful and very cool to try. Highly recommended.
I watched him in fencing competitions a few times.
When Art asked me to be his Best Man years later it struck as to why and I was deeply ashamed and chastened. I saw him as an interesting buddy.
I rallied the troops. “Art and Angie are getting married this weekend in Duluth. Angie’s an awesome girl. Art is a super dude. We are going in force to be there for them! Be there or be forever judged lame.” Ten, twelve people rallied. We had a three vehicle convoy north. Stayed at the round Radisson hotel that looks like the LA Empire Records building.
It was freaking awesome! We bummed around downtown. The waterfront. Went up to and climbed Enger Tower for the view. The girls took Angie out for her Bachelorette, the boys took Art out to the world’s coolest nudie bar. It’s right downtown by the waterfront. Gorgeous wooden horseshoe bar and built in dioramas of taxidermy chipmunks playing pool, cards, etc. So frickin adorable!
Not a fan of nudie bars, myself. I’m het, but unearned nudity kinda freaks me out. Earned nudity is cool as fuck, unearned public nudity creeps me out hard. Not a fan. I don’t judge (much) for those that can cope with it. I hung out with the gay lads that night, mostly. We were cool. The only person that got wasted that night was Timmy. Fucking Timmy, man….
Art impressed the fuck out of me. As we walked in he declared loudly that he would accept no lap dance. Nope. Would leave and get a taxi home. Not having any of that at all. Good on him! Every girl in the joint kissed his cheek and wished him a good wedding. Hell, I kissed his cheek! He was such a gentleman all night. He’s a good dude.
My friend Jodi has video of me desperately trying not to cry throughout the entire ceremony. I failed twice. Catholic wedding, so a mini sermon. I prefer Lurheran weddings. In. Out. Boom. Done. 18 minutes or less. Lutheran weddings are efficient.
The girls bought a super awesome thoughtful gift which I have now forgotten entirely. Us boys gave the gift of cash. Here’s 12 hundred dollars in twenties fresh out of the ATM. Buy something nice. It was the best we could think of at the time.
Who doesn’t like cash? How often do you use that sterling silver melon baller thingie you got? Why would anyone want a gravy boat? Wedding gifts are stupid. Give cash.
Last night, on Christmas Eve, I was over at my parents’ new senior living apartment, where they were hosting my visiting brother and sister-in-law. Dinner was in the oven, almost finished. Dad opened the oven to peek at it, and *POOF* — flash of sparks, smoke, dead stove. Our best guess is that steam from the oven shorted something in the control panel.*
Oh noes! But Christmas Dinner will be here tomorrow, and most of the menu just became impossible!
So, what did we do?
0. The pies had already been baked. Yay!
1. Finish dinner in the microwave. Eat it. Yum.
2. Take out tomorrow’s beef, season it, and wrap it to take over to Other Brother, who will cook it at his house in the morning
3. Replace all of the roasted/braised/sauteed dishes with steamed treatments that can happen in a microwave
4. Do the rolls at my house, and add some raw heirloom tomatoes and balsamic vinegar to the menu
5. Bring good wine
It was a lovely meal — tenderloin, sauce bordelaise, mashed potatoes, green beans, sourdough rolls, cornbread, heirloom tomatoes drizzled with old balsamico, 1999 1er cru burgundy, chased with pecan, cherry, and blackberry pies. Kept warm in the toaster oven Other Brother brought over with the beef. Presents for the kids, then the adults all watched “Knives Out” (which the parents had never seen).
Pretty damn good Christmas.
* Genius design award #126: put electronics in the path of steam
I prefer Lurheran weddings. In. Out. Boom. Done. 18 minutes or less. Lutheran weddings are efficient.
AFAICT, every single thing in the Lutheran Book of Worship is designed to last exactly 50 minutes, start-to-finish. I was taught growing up that that’s because it takes 50 minutes for the 4 coffee urns in the basement to finish perking. Only time I ever saw the Old Ladies in the Second Row get upset was when visiting ministers would run significantly over 50 minutes. Past an hour, they were getting up and going downstairs for coffee and cookies.
BTW, I’m advised that those were Irish pipes, not Scottish. Us Northern Luddites don’t know nuthin bout no pipe, howsomever.
I hope that the joy and beauty of the season will be with all of you throughout the coming year. Whatever you’re celebrating, may peace be with you and yours. From Casa Luddite, Merry Christmas!
Bah! Humbug!
Gee, what happened to the war on Christmas?
Happy holidays all!
I will have to make or receive about 5 or 6 calls today. Three of them will be no problem and I could chat for hours. But I know they have family to get back to, so I’ll cut it short.
I will have at least two obligatory ones where I run out of shit to talk about four minutes in. Thankfully, this year, we can swap very recent weather anecdotes.
I hate awkwardness. I am calling you or you are calling me out of perceived obligation. I don’t really know you, and you don’t know me and we never think about each other at all ever, but we are compelled to pretend to care.
Everyone I actually care about got their present two weeks ago (mail early). You got a card.
When you are going into an awkward / uncomfortable fake bonhomie everything is copacetic phone conversation always have an out planned beforehand. Always!
5 to 8 minutes and bail. Ask about family. Talk about weather. Bail. There is no upside.
I lost.
Kari Lake got her dumb ass lawsuit bumrushed out the door late yesterday. She asked to be declared the winner and had no evidence.
One of her begs was that excessive wait times chased away R voters. Dude! I grew up with if you went to vote after work it was guaranteed two hour line. I coped. It was expected.
Does waiting in line only impact R voters? Urban voters are used to that shit and it is remarkable if it only takes a half hour.
They were hanging their speculation on very urban, very diverse Maricopa County. You know, a hot bed of suppressed Republucan voters. I’m curious why the court even entertained the suit without any merit.
@de stijl:
America does not like poor losers and unsportsmanlike conduct.
Amongst persuadable voters this nonsense looks and feels like really shitty, and frankly detestable behavior.
Suing because you lost is a pathetic loser asshole move. You win no future votes and lose many by doing that.
You lost. Admit it. Be a fucking adult.
@de stijl: It’s OK if DEM voters have to wait 3 hours in a freezing rain to vote because they are godless heathens who deserve to suffer. GOP voters however are the chosen people who if inconvenienced in any way possible it is an offense to God and the constitution.
Yeah, I’ll just bet they were full of Xmas joy.
I just realized that in one of my obligatory calls I can’t even bring up the weather because that guy will go off on how AGW and the whole concept of global warming is a plot and is not happening at all and will prompt a reactionary anti-Marxist screed. Happens two times out of three. He is very predictable.
Dollars to doughnuts that guy bought into QAnon in the last 12 months. He is that stupid. He is 100% the type to be that amenable to their pitch.
Fuck my life! Grr! I have a dodge planned out, it’s cool. My doorbell will ring mid “conversation” guaranteed. A friend is coming over soon. I will ring the doorbell myself. I will have planted that seed up front. Always have a plan!
Merry Christmas, OTB friends!
A merry and a happy to all!
@de stijl: My plan would be to plant my phone in a kitchen drawer.
@OzarkHillbilly:
Then maybe you’ll like this one:
Robespierre once argued passionately in front of the National Constituent Assembly for the abolition of the death penalty.
A few months later he voted for the execution of Louis XVI, after arguing the deposed king shouldn’t even receive a trial.
A few years after that he was the prime moving force behind the Terror, which saw thousands executed with minimal legal niceties, and often for spurious reasons. Many were his political enemies and rivals
It gets worse. Two of those executed political enemies, Danton and Desmoulins, were his friends.
The morning of September 11th, 2001 was an local election day in Minneapolis. Bright, sunny, gorgeous day. I was between gigs. I was up early. My polling place was about a mile away up on Lake St. In September so it had to have been a primary. I cannot recall exactly.
A mile? Yeah, I’ll walk it and not have to worry about parking. I showed up about 8:03 AM and I was first to vote there that day. No line that Tuesday very early morning. I got the first “I voted!” sticker of the day. I wore it proudly. The poll workers were very pleasant. Got a coffee to go at Brueger’s. I walked home. Easiest voting experience ever.
Stopped off at the corner store at Hennepin and Franklin to buy a ginger ale and everybody was looking at the TV in the corner and was kinda freaked out. Something weird was going on in NYC.
I got home and turned on the TV to watch CNN to see what the hell was going on.
@de stijl: I was doing a couple of side jobs for friends. I watched the towers come down and then I went to work. When I was finally finished that evening, it took damned near forever to find a gas station that still had gas.
I just felt like “Haysoos crispo! Fer cryin’ out loud, it’s not the end of the world!”
@Sleeping Dog:
Well, I did get a giant Bi Flag colored Squishmellow that’s also a DJ. So, I think we won that war. At least around these parts.
I’ll use my Christmas edit:
https://squishmallowsquad.fandom.com/wiki/Syana
Merry Christmas to all who gather here. I appreciate the community, virtual though it is.
The kids (23 and 25) live in the Bay Area. Daughter #2 who works in a grocery store had to work Xmas Eve and morning. So we decide to fly up. Except that we just got a dog who’s had a tough life and was not ready for airports but is an excellent car dog. So, OK, we’ll do the drive, stopping for the night as always (because I’m that lazy) at the Allegretto, in Paso Robles.
The glitch: dog, plus suitcase plus tons of gifts do not fit in a Mercedes convertible. So, shit, fuck, we have to take the Volvo EV. Here’s the thing: the charging structure for EVs is absolutely not there yet. We did the same drive a year ago and it was bad, but this time we planned more meticulously. Which would have worked except that:
1) 80% of available charging stations are basically an extension cord out the window of someone’s garden apartment. I exaggerate, but not by much.
2) Of actual available chargers, only 10% are reasonably fast, the 350 watts.
3) Of 350 watt chargers, 80% are broken. As are 70% of 150 watt. What is actually available? 50 watt. Which is to say, 36 watt in reality. Hours and hours of waiting to get another 200 miles.
Conclusion: we dumped the Volvo in Paso Robles after a desperate morning searching for juice. Rented a massive, gas-guzzling Toyota 4Runner, and drove to the Bay.
God bless the internal combustion engine.
Things I like about Christmas: The lights.
Things I hate about Christmas: The music, the way things close down, the utter waste of time and money that is gifting. The way materialism crushes the poor and working class. Trying to remember what we tipped the pool guy last year. The Santa lie we tell to children, setting them up for a lifetime of distrusting their lying parents. Everything about the tree – the buying, the schlepping, the decorating, the disposing – everything except the actual finished tree, which has the aforementioned lights.
I realize people would not be able to go cold turkey, but I have long hoped that we could begin to transition away from Christmas. A first step: reform the gifting process. Everyone in the usual gifting group writes a hundred dollar check to everyone else. On Christmas morning, having enjoyed the experience of opening envelopes to find $100, we all ceremoniously tear up the checks. Then we order Chinese food.
A Merry and Safe Christmas too all who observe! And safe travels to all on the road.
@Michael Reynolds: The wife and I largely eschew gifts for one another on the reasonable grounds that we pretty much just buy what we want all year. Gifts for the kids still make sense, given their extremely limited income. But her side of the family has this annoying tradition where her parents, her sister, SO, their kids, an aunt and uncle and sometimes their kids assemble, along with the seven of us somewhere (lately, here) for a near-Christmas meal and gift exchange. Except that the gifts are almost always complete crap that nobody wants but, not only cost money, but also stress and time trying to guess what some reasonably affluent adult they don’t actually know all that well might possibly want. I’m trying to get them to abandon that practice on the account of it being stupid.
@OzarkHillbilly: In Lake’s case, it’s AZ. It is trivially easy to be on the list where they mail you a ballot every election and you can sit in a lovely warm dry kitchen — say, with cookies baking in the oven just for ambiance — while you fill out your ballot. Note that this system was installed by Republican-controlled state government, before the crazies took over the party.
ETA: When I gave blood earlier this month, the new t-shirt says, “Will exchange blood for cookies.”
@Michael Cain: The Republicans liked vote-by-mail prior to 2020. In fact, the one case of which I’m aware of large-scale fraud through mail ballots was the 2018 House race in North Carolina (which led to a do-over). But somehow they never bring that one up.
I bought and put up lights one year. Holy crap, was that a mistake.
I’d never owned a house before. It seemed like a good and neighborly thing to do. I was wrong. I hated putting them up. I actually plugged them in for a grand total of maybe twenty hours. I hated taking them down. The entire process annoyed me greatly. Why would anyone do this on purpose? Every year?
Not my speed. No offense. I am not a Christmas light decorative homeowner.
Next winter, or the winter after, I saw a neighbor on a ladder putting up his lights. (I smoked at the time. You see a lot if you are out on your porch 7 minutes of every hour at odd times night and day. Interesting stuff is happening all around you and often and you never see it because you are not outside.)
I fetched my four strings of lights out of the basement, walked up and called out “Hey! I have some Christmas lights I no longer need. They are yours if you want them.” He gladly accepted. More power to him! Win – Win!
I wanted them out of my possession to prevent sunk-cost pressure to try it again. I am literally that stupidly bull-headed.
I like buying gifts for people I know well, because I can get them stuff that they will 1) appreciate and 2) possibly not get for themselves.
A memorable one was for a friend who loved combat aircraft, and in particular the Panavia Tornado (a fighter built jointly by several European countries in the 80s). I got him a very tall, very wide, very thin, hardcover book printed on glossy paper with tons of illustrations, photos, and diagrams, telling the history, development, specs, and deployment history of the Tornado.
I also got similar books for myself on the A-10 Warthog, and the Space Shuttle.
Otherwise, I would endorse Michael’s addition to the Sheldon Cooper Gift-giving Principle:
“You think you are being generous, but the foundation of gift giving is reciprocity. You haven’t given me a gift. You’ve given me an obligation. .. I now have to go out and purchase for you a gift of commensurate value and representing the same perceived level of friendship as that represented by the gift you’ve given me. It’s no wonder suicide rates skyrocket this time of year.
..
The entire institution of gift giving make no sense. Let’s say that I go out, and I spend 50 dollars on you, it’s a laborious activity, because I have to imagine what you need, whereas you know what you need. Now I could simplify things, just give you the 50 dollars directly, and you could give me 50 dollars on my birthday, and so on, until one of us dies, leaving the other one old and 50 dollars richer.”
While I have also spent years trying to get my extended family to limit gift giving to kids, I have to admi that getting annoyed at giving gifts is the ultimate first world problem…
Where I’m staying for the holiday is quite nice, but the beds are the highest I’ve ever seen. I literally have to climb into mine. Getting up is largely a matter of sliding over the side and hoping you land on your feet.
Merry Christmas to all who observe it!
We have no family within 500 miles and so the holidays are always celebrated with our friends, our “chosen family.” My wife and I don’t give each other presents, as James says we pretty much just buy what we want all year. We give the kids money, the gift that is always the right size and color.
We had our chosen family over for a great feast on the 23rd. The highlight of Christmas Eve was a nearly two hour video call with our daughter who lives too far away. Today we’re going out for Chinese.
My wife and I have the next week off. There will be much relaxing. Maybe we’ll make our way into DC and hit a couple museums.
Merry Christmas to all!
@Kathy: Why is that a problem? We are like elephants, wolves, lions; we’re pack animals. Mutual reciprocity and obligation is fundamental to that. Yes, I am wealthy enough that I have no material needs, but I do need family and friends. I try to gauge my gifts to make sure that my good financial position doesn’t create an unwelcome imbalance. This requires some effort at times. The effort, the hassle, the nuisance is the point. Kathy, please accept my figurative gift of a book of nature illustrations by early European explorers. Michael, I have a bottle of the 18 year old Oban for you. I’m still working on the gifts for the rest of you.
The best of the season to all. I’m glad it’s winding down though as I’ve had enough, pah rump a pum pum
@Michael Reynolds:
Inject the grumpy directly into my veins. Lol, that was a nice present.
Today is pretty hard for me. I’m massively estranged from my birth family and I’m fairly well estranged from my in-laws. I miss my parents. But it’s not real. Their love was always conditional on whatever shifting vagueness floated into their brains on a moment to moment basis.
As for gifts, my dad frequently got my mom aggressively crappy gifts. There was one year he got her a Barbie fur coat and a bunch of matchbox cars. Or the year that he RENTED her a slide projector. Because of that I try and get my partner something nice and thoughtful. I failed at that this year for reasons. She understands, I just feel bad I had my head up my tuchus.
Anyway. Sorry for the bummer. Hope everyone is having a nice day.
@Sleeping Dog:
Looking around Casa Luddite, we surrendered, or at least retreated towards Paris from the road to Moscow.* No, seriously, this year, as every year for the past 11, I’ve gotten what I most wanted – another trip around the sun to spend with my family and friends. Sappy but true!
*No, actually, it was pretty quiet here. Usual breakfast with SWMBO and the kids; exchanged a few gifts with each other. Later, we’ve got a ham and cheesy scalloped taters in the oven. Half a dozen desserts, and whatever else we can find to stuff our faces with.
@James Joyner:
Yeah, SWMBO’s family was into that whole shebang for years. Stupid poem with blind packages (mandatory ceiling of $25 circa mid 90’s) being handed left, handed right, etc., etc. for an eternity. I apparently broke the idea the year that we found a very nice cast iron tree stand, enamel coated, gorgeous! It weighed about 30#, and I couldn’t keep a straight face watching everyone! Only part that sucked was we didn’t win it – we’d really wanted it to cat-proof the tree!
@Michael Reynolds:
I don’t remember lying to her about it after about age 5, but I’m sure we did. Cultural upbringing. But when she was old enough to ask about it, my response was, “if you’re following the example of St. Nicholas in gifting to others without expecting anything in return, congratulations, you’re being Santa Claus.” While she still likes getting gifts, she spends significant time picking out things to delight others.
@Beth:
I won the family fight by getting kicked out of my birth family (apparently my imitation of Christ and the Temple Moneylenders one Thanksgiving was too good). BTW, love the Squishmallow! Even cooler than the unicorn one I got the daughter!
@Michael Reynolds: Yup, that’s roughly the experience that the car mag guys have been having, and probably the only reason Tesla is still afloat: their stations actually work (and are mostly of the fast variety).
@Beth: From what I know, your “reasons” are pretty solid this year. But don’t f*** it up next year! (joking) I’m glad you and your partner are thoughtful about it. Gift giving/receiving is not my personal love language, but I put thought into it when I must.
Happy holidays everyone, whatever you’re doing or celebrating this time of year!
My kids are at their mom’s, but they celebrated with me yesterday and it was joyful. A couple friends are stopping by today, so I’m not doing Christmas alone, yay!
Happy Holiday to all you woke libruls..cuz Merry Chrithmus is for real ‘Murikins 🙂
@Beth:
No need to apologize. I was estranged from my mother for decades. Unmedicated bipolarism (my strong assumption) = bad parenting. Being an adult with strong, clear boundaries is a good thing. Keep on your path if you know you are right. Screw those guys!
Find / make your own family. People you trust to have your back. People who know actually the real you. Hold those tight (but not too tight).
Be you. Be honestly you amongst your chosen family. Maybe hold back a bit on the stuff you choose not to share with your therapist. (Be open, but don’t be a moron.)
—–
The best weird gift story is not mine but a friend of mine. The BiL of my friend gave my friend’s sister a rototiller as a gift. She apparently loved it.
A rototiller? Not in a million years could I have been that creative. It only gets used twice a year, but both times saves her dozens of hours of hard labor. Dude was a genius!
As to your gift to your partner that did not work as well as you’d hoped. Hey, now you know better. You now have the perfect opportunity to give an unexpected gift out of the blue. Pick a random Thursday in January and do it. The thing, the gift, itself does not matter, like, at all. Give them their figurative rototiller. Or a blatant white elephant. The thing doesn’t really matter. Everybody needs socks. Socks are always a good option. Nobody “needs” fancy cool-ass napkin rings, but once you have them they can cross that off their list. I’ve got the whole napkin ring situation permanently sorted out thanks to a thoughtful gift. An 8oz. bag of Fun-yuns is a fine gift.
The “it” doesn’t matter.
The internal combustion engine is a curse upon the face of mankind. Did you know we used to walk every where we needed to go? Then we rode horses and donkeys where we needed to go? Then we trained oxen to pull our carts/wagons where we needed to go?
And now we dare not be inconvenienced in any way shape or form on our journeys as we desire to be there there there right now now now. Never mind wait an extra day. (don’t even get me started on how long it took our forebears to cross this continent)
Jesus H f’n Christ, we actually think we have a right to be anywhere we want to be any time we want to be and fuck the world our children will have to live in.
Humanity sucks donkey f’n dick.
I sense a disconnect here.
You can always do what I did James: Refuse to partake. Sure, some will have their feelings hurt, but most will be secretly grateful. The few who will still object? Will be told the sit down and STFU.
@de stijl: I got you beat: I have never put up Xmas lights.
Oh, F that sht. I didn’t ask for it, I never wanted it. Here, get your money back.
Really? Must be nice to receive shit you never wanted and would never buy in a thousand years and pretend for the rest of the day like it is just the thing you’ve always wanted because you can see in their face how much thought they put into buying the “perfect” gift.
Fuck. that. shit.
I got my Mom a Roomba for Christmas. Even if the damn thing doesn’t clean to her satisfaction, we have had HOURS of laughter today watching it do a mapping run. And it got stuck on one of her glue mousetraps, so they thought that was pretty hilarious when “Roomie” sent her a text saying he was stuck. I would imagine she’ll spend all night watching it bump into shit. 😛 😛
Lying parents
I remember when the big kid down the block told me that there was no Santa Claus. I might have been in the first grade. He was in 2nd or 3rd. I went home and asked mom and dad “Richie Gruenberg just told me that there is no Santa Claus.” They fessed up. I don’t remember being all that disappointed. I don’t think that I really believed one guy could get to every house in the world in one night even if he had a flying sleigh. Not possible.
The Easter Bunny was another matter. For several more years my folks kept up that ruse. Baskets of candy they said they found on the front porch. My dad even told me he saw the varmint at the neighbors front door. Don’t remember how long it took me to shake that tale.
@Michael Reynolds:
I love the idea of just giving cash as a gift, but I would go one step further and put a caveat on it.
Unless you absolutely need this $100 for groceries or bills, this gift is for a thing that you seriously considered, but passed up on for whatever reason. Go buy that thing you almost bought that one time. You will enjoy it.
Everybody needs to spend excess cash on something they want, but cannot justify practically. We need to be stupidly frivolous on occasion. Being strictly practical is stifling.
I don’t care what is – a Warhammer 40k figurine you fancy, the super-deluxe Blu-Ray of Fast and Furious Tokyo Drift. Whatever, it doesn’t fucking matter.
Just buy it. Trust me. You can thank me later.
—–
Cash as a gift. One day out of the blue my buddy Art called me up and asked me to be his Best Man. When? Saturday. Okay.
The thing is that I had spent maybe 30 or 40 hours total with him over the span of 6 years. Of course he was marrying Angie, perhaps the cutest, most adorable person on the planet, maybe ever. She’s maybe 4’11” and Art is at least 6’2″. They are so cute together. Warms my heart thinking about them.
A super solid interesting guy who I enjoyed interacting with occassionally, a very focused cat. He was into fencing and bagpipes. Not the world’s most socially adept person by any standard, and my standards are pretty low. The bagpipes practice thing got him banished to the far northern reaches of the soccer practice field as far away from anyone as possible. 8AM to 9 PM only. Art created a new campus rule which I think is pretty fucking awesome.
One day he was at Friday Afternoon Club drinking beer with the crew and I asked him if he would be okay in giving me the basics of how to play the bagpipes one day. He said sure, how about tomorrow morning?
I dragged my sorry, hungover, aspirin gulping ass up to the far edge of the soccer field by 9AM. Art was so chipper I wanted to punch him.
He ran me through the basics. One thing I was totally unaware of is that the sound only comes from squeezing the bladder out through the various horns kind of like an old school organ. The straw thing you see bagpipers blowing into is only to refill the bladder for the next riff. It’s very aerobic, I got light headed. You have to puff pretty fucking hard.
The controls for the horns are wicked hard complicated. Fingerings is involved. I sucked.
After an hour I could “sqounk” a little bit as if I knew vaguely what I was doing. It was delightful and very cool to try. Highly recommended.
I watched him in fencing competitions a few times.
When Art asked me to be his Best Man years later it struck as to why and I was deeply ashamed and chastened. I saw him as an interesting buddy.
I rallied the troops. “Art and Angie are getting married this weekend in Duluth. Angie’s an awesome girl. Art is a super dude. We are going in force to be there for them! Be there or be forever judged lame.” Ten, twelve people rallied. We had a three vehicle convoy north. Stayed at the round Radisson hotel that looks like the LA Empire Records building.
It was freaking awesome! We bummed around downtown. The waterfront. Went up to and climbed Enger Tower for the view. The girls took Angie out for her Bachelorette, the boys took Art out to the world’s coolest nudie bar. It’s right downtown by the waterfront. Gorgeous wooden horseshoe bar and built in dioramas of taxidermy chipmunks playing pool, cards, etc. So frickin adorable!
Not a fan of nudie bars, myself. I’m het, but unearned nudity kinda freaks me out. Earned nudity is cool as fuck, unearned public nudity creeps me out hard. Not a fan. I don’t judge (much) for those that can cope with it. I hung out with the gay lads that night, mostly. We were cool. The only person that got wasted that night was Timmy. Fucking Timmy, man….
Art impressed the fuck out of me. As we walked in he declared loudly that he would accept no lap dance. Nope. Would leave and get a taxi home. Not having any of that at all. Good on him! Every girl in the joint kissed his cheek and wished him a good wedding. Hell, I kissed his cheek! He was such a gentleman all night. He’s a good dude.
My friend Jodi has video of me desperately trying not to cry throughout the entire ceremony. I failed twice. Catholic wedding, so a mini sermon. I prefer Lurheran weddings. In. Out. Boom. Done. 18 minutes or less. Lutheran weddings are efficient.
The girls bought a super awesome thoughtful gift which I have now forgotten entirely. Us boys gave the gift of cash. Here’s 12 hundred dollars in twenties fresh out of the ATM. Buy something nice. It was the best we could think of at the time.
Who doesn’t like cash? How often do you use that sterling silver melon baller thingie you got? Why would anyone want a gravy boat? Wedding gifts are stupid. Give cash.
@Jim Brown 32:
Well, this Lefty’s only recognized holiday is May 1. So I’ll bank your happy holidays for that day.
If that means my RealMurican pass is revoked, so be it.
So, we had our Christmas miracle 🙂
Last night, on Christmas Eve, I was over at my parents’ new senior living apartment, where they were hosting my visiting brother and sister-in-law. Dinner was in the oven, almost finished. Dad opened the oven to peek at it, and *POOF* — flash of sparks, smoke, dead stove. Our best guess is that steam from the oven shorted something in the control panel.*
Oh noes! But Christmas Dinner will be here tomorrow, and most of the menu just became impossible!
So, what did we do?
0. The pies had already been baked. Yay!
1. Finish dinner in the microwave. Eat it. Yum.
2. Take out tomorrow’s beef, season it, and wrap it to take over to Other Brother, who will cook it at his house in the morning
3. Replace all of the roasted/braised/sauteed dishes with steamed treatments that can happen in a microwave
4. Do the rolls at my house, and add some raw heirloom tomatoes and balsamic vinegar to the menu
5. Bring good wine
It was a lovely meal — tenderloin, sauce bordelaise, mashed potatoes, green beans, sourdough rolls, cornbread, heirloom tomatoes drizzled with old balsamico, 1999 1er cru burgundy, chased with pecan, cherry, and blackberry pies. Kept warm in the toaster oven Other Brother brought over with the beef. Presents for the kids, then the adults all watched “Knives Out” (which the parents had never seen).
Pretty damn good Christmas.
* Genius design award #126: put electronics in the path of steam
@de stijl:
AFAICT, every single thing in the Lutheran Book of Worship is designed to last exactly 50 minutes, start-to-finish. I was taught growing up that that’s because it takes 50 minutes for the 4 coffee urns in the basement to finish perking. Only time I ever saw the Old Ladies in the Second Row get upset was when visiting ministers would run significantly over 50 minutes. Past an hour, they were getting up and going downstairs for coffee and cookies.
BTW, I’m advised that those were Irish pipes, not Scottish. Us Northern Luddites don’t know nuthin bout no pipe, howsomever.