OTB Caption Contest Winners

The Three Hour Tour Edition OTB Caption ContestTM is now over.

The Three Hour Tour Edition OTB Caption ContestTM is now over.

North Korean leader Kim Jong Un stands on the conning tower of a submarine during his inspection of the KPA Naval Unit 167



First: Franklin – And now, I will preemptively attack the yachts of Seth Rogen and James Franco …

Second: Doug Mataconis“The weather started getting rough, the tiny ship was tossed. If not for the courage of the fearless crew, the Minnow would be lost, the Minnow would be lost…….”

Third: markm – “They call me Kim Jong Unshmael….”


Mu – “And they told me I couldn’t have a submarine as a bathtub toy. Just needed a bigger bathtub.”

RockThisTown – We’re gonna need a bigger boat.

OzarkHillbilly – The Kimchi of the seas.

Paul Hooson – “Wow, those James Bond villains are sure going downhill….”

Guarneri – Kwang said “hey fat boy the whales are over HERE,” Ho laughed……..and no one has seen them since.

RGardner – My submarines are so powerful that they are always on the surface! Only weak Imperialist lackey submarines submerge!

James Pearce – “I’m king of the world!”


“Who’s the Un-boat commander?”

“C2…” “Crap, you sunk by battleship.”

“No Dear Leader, no girls here… I think EMERGENCY BLOW is only a submariner term.”

I am Dear Leader of the sea,
The ruler of my own Navee,
and I always wear grey khaki pants.
“and so do his sisters, and his cousins, and his aunts!
and so do his sisters and his cousins, and his aunts!”

I sorta get a power high
At sea, I watch my missiles fly.
And I snap my fingers at South Korea’s taunts
“and so do his sisters, and his cousins, and his aunts!
and so do his sisters, and his cousins, and his aunts!”

But when an ill wind blows
I lead then from below
and compose new despot rules and rants
“to make for his sisters, and his cousins, and his aunts!
to make for his sisters and his cousins, and his aunts!
His sister and his cousins, whom he rules by the dozens, and his aunts!”

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Rodney Dill
About Rodney Dill
Rodney is an IT Implementation Consultant in the Motor City and working within the Automotive Industry. He contributed to OTB from November 2004 until retiring in July 2017, hosting some 1200 OTB Caption Contests.


  1. Gustopher says:

    Nothing about Dukakis? You people disappoint me. This is a conservative blog, and at least half of the commenters are conservative, and still no Dukakis…

  2. Rodney Dill says:

    @Gustopher: John425 had this one: “Little Kim Jong Un decides to do Michael Dukakis’s tank photo op one better.” It just didn’t make the cut, not that it wasn’t funny, 90%+ of the captions are good. You should note that while I will recognize political captions or slams, the best captions, IMO, are often not entirely political in nature.

  3. Paul Hooson says:

    Not only are the James Bond villains going downhill….But, now Roger Corman is producing the movie and they can only afford to pay just three Koreans…

    Oh, and in reference to Gustopher, it was rather remarkable that no Dukakis references were made here…Well, tanks alot….

  4. Paul Hooson says:

    @Rodney Dill: I certainly agree that many of the best captions are not political. Often, they come across as merely partisan jabs rather than being more universal humor or just a cheap little joke which is funny and good for a laugh.

    BTW, talking about cheap, I hear some people are saving money on presents this Christmas….They took Robin Williams off their list…And Bill Cosby too!

  5. anjin-san says:


    Yea, the “playing chicken with Mike Dukakis” thing seems obvious…

  6. Rodney Dill says:

    @Paul Hooson: I did mention the one Dukakis reference, above.

    …and the problem with political captions is the attempt at commentary or just out right jabs gets in the way of the humor. Of course, when rarely done right, they can be the best.

  7. Rodney Dill says:

    @anjin-san: Actually “playing Chicken” with Mike Dukakis might’ve made the honorable mention. Dukakis is dated and slamming him just isn’t that funny, but playing chicken with him is a twist.

  8. Franklin says:

    Thanks for the victory … IIRC, that’s my second first place, woo-hoo!

    BTW, I haven’t figured out what tune to sing your song to …

  9. Rodney Dill says:

    @Franklin: Here is the tune.
    Not the best example of it, but you’ll get the gist.

    Didn’t cross my mind that people wouldn’t think of this one,

  10. rodney dill says:
  11. Franklin says:

    Heh, undoubtedly a classic. But I’m just not that familiar with the scores of famous comic operas (or really, any operas at all).